Come into our tent. Wet and loosen your lips…
Yeah, sorry about Disqus being yanked down around our ankles three nights ago.
One of the networks serving those stupid ads that at least a hundred thousand of you devils are clicking on every month (Married teacher screams as she’s jailed for affair with student, aged 12 etc) , decided to introduce infinite scrolling into its code without a call, a mail, whatever.
It ain’t going to happen today, tonight, in whatever time zone you occupy. Bulletproof-ish.
Today, the newly anointed round of 32, formerly round three and the first time we see a bulk of surfers ejected from the event.
Can you believe there’s been sixteen heats, for a total of eight hours of surfing, and only four competitors have been sent home?
Now we get real.
Sixteen heats for sixteen losers.
I’ve got a cheap wine poured over ice. And plenty to refill.
Men’s Round of 32 Matchups:
Heat 1: Jordy Smith (ZAF) vs. Soli Bailey (AUS)
Heat 2: Owen Wright (AUS) vs. Joan Duru (FRA)
Heat 3: Gabriel Medina (BRA) vs. Griffin Colapinto (USA)
Heat 4: Ryan Callinan (AUS) vs. Yago Dora (BRA)
Heat 5: Kolohe Andino (USA) vs. Adriano de Souza (BRA)
Heat 6: Jeremy Flores (FRA) vs. Deivid Silva (BRA)
Heat 7: Julian Wilson (AUS) vs. Ezekiel Lau (HAW)
Heat 8: Conner Coffin (USA) vs. Adrian Buchan (AUS)
Heat 9: Filipe Toledo (BRA) vs. Michael February (ZAF)
Heat 10: Michael Rodrigues (BRA) vs. Willian Cardoso (BRA)
Heat 11: Wade Carmichael (AUS) vs. Sebastian Zietz (HAW)
Heat 12: Michel Bourez (FRA) vs. Ricardo Christie (NZL)
Heat 13: Kanoa Igarashi (JPN) vs. Frederico Morais (PRT)
Heat 14: Seth Moniz (HAW) vs. Peterson Crisanto (BRA)
Heat 15: Kelly Slater (USA) vs. Caio Ibelli (BRA)
Heat 16: Italo Ferreira (BRA) vs. Jack Freestone (AUS)
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Come on Davo, do us all a favour and deep throat a shotie and pull the go button
me…
You coulda just pretended.
Um beijo minha princessa!
would have liked to see curren and occy surf again this year.
id rather just watch Curren all alone
that last time was not good for occy, seems to be in much better shape nowadays.
“not so good”? pretty fucked i say ..
You were GREAT!
Can you still see the moon?
Let’s look at it together and we’ll conquer our tyranny of distance
Good event so far.
i love it
Sim, only 12 and already cooler than Pete!
He’s looking at Pete like who’s this Forest Gump muthafuka
She’s gotta keep it out of the way of her left tit.
Caroline !
She woulda beat jack weakstone
Very rad!
steph is a faller.
It’s true
Women not ladies Barton. You are lucky Jen See is not awake yet.
You could say t”dickheads “for men, and no-one would care
Yeah, my suspicion is that it Mick fucked Tyler half to death. Yikes, Twillsy, we really have to stop fantasising about this stuff.
Geez lil extreme?!
Lakey looks good enough to pull into
You might need another time out.
Pete Mel: “speed is great, but you gotta control it”
Pete’s gotta go
He’s dead weight
Isn’t that a prerequisite?
he knows
Fred Morais for the height X skin tone
M Feb vs S Gilmore – who wins?
50 50
This a snooze fest already.
I’m tapping out.
Longtoms getting his Kelly on
I can feel it
They allowed to catch waves?
Bit rough following the brazzo Ferrari.
Italo just said jack smells like rotten baked beans