Dream Hard: 40-ish-year-old “British” surfer set to make Olympic Team!

Would you like a BeachGrit sponsorship?

And you thought Kelly Slater’s Olympic aspirations were inspirational. You thought the greatest competitive surfer the world has ever seen, armed with affirming life coach, supportive longtime girlfriend, millions of dollars, professional surfing’s owner Co-Waterperson of the Year Dirk Ziff, millions of sycophants including, but not limited to, the involuntarily celibate Ben Marcus, etc. was inspirational?

Well let me introduce you to 36-year-old Jay Quinn. He’s got none of that, surfs for the World’s Greatest Surf Paradise Great Britain and is headed to the Olympics, I think, but we must head to the BBC for all the truth and not only because the BBC is the historical record of the World’s Greatest Surf Paradise but because, much to Drew Kampion’s chagrin, I’m boozed again.

Britain’s number one surfer Jay Quinn feels he has a good chance of qualifying for the 2020 Olympic Games and is already dreaming of a podium finish in Japan next year.

The 36-year-old will be guaranteed an Olympic spot should he become the highest placed European competitor at the International Surfing Association World Games in Miyazaki, Japan from 7-11 September.

Born in Gisborne, New Zealand, Quinn qualifies for Great Britain through his Welsh-born mother and has become Welsh, British and European champion since moving to Cornwall in 2016.

New Zealand? Son of a bitch and Negatron? Can you claim some other nation too?

But ok here and let’s be real honest with each other. You have a shot. You know you do. What nationality can you claim? BeachGrit will sponsor if you can prove a legitimate shot for Kazakstan slash Kazakstan-esque nation.

I’m drunkenly serious.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
54 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
John Non John
John Non John
6 years ago

SPONSOR HIM or some other low skill surfer! Are surfboards allowed to be covered in sponsors logos in Olympic comps?

Make some fun gear for him to wear, add some good PR, training videos etc. and, oh boy, you could help him become a popular athlete. NonJohn approves.

It seems like a very good idea currently, but NonJohn has well exceeded his daily rations.

slaters foot
slaters foot
6 years ago

So excited to watch him compete in 1-3 foot slop. At least we all have the up-coming excitement of this momentous occasion to get us through the dark days of our lives

torteloni
torteloni
6 years ago

why isn’t this cunt surfing for new zealand? his home country and the place that taught him how to surf? what a fcukin traitor, these flags of convenience are vomit inducing and deserve to be called out as such.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago
Reply to  torteloni

He’s not good enough to surf for NZ these days though…
(Which means the Brits must really be crap)

f u
f u
6 years ago

Potzz should make a comeback and surf for the UK

joeys nosegard
joeys nosegard
6 years ago

I have grand parents who are Dutch on one side and Romany the other. I’m still decided which country to hitch my caravan to

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  joeys nosegard

Birmingham, England. Peaky Blinders all the way!

shootsthen
shootsthen
6 years ago

“Tommy!!”

Ollybeak
Ollybeak
6 years ago

Otherwise known as a “Guernsey” – my home land is the place of origin.

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
6 years ago

well tanned. just back from a month in indo.

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
6 years ago

yep. known as the ISA

John Melba
John Melba
6 years ago

My dads Scottish…but yeh still Great Britain until we Get our Freeeeedom lol.
And yeh better surfers than me in even in the Grey icy north seas of Caledonia.

Brutus
Brutus
6 years ago
Reply to  John Melba

is your sista Pam?

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago

Na, it means Shun (provisionally) would be in via this route, and Iggi still gets in with his high wosl rating

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
6 years ago

I’ll compete for Germany with Marlon Lipke… sponsor me!… while we work out a deal, you can solidify our team by hitching a ride on the Gabby Train!… https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

David
David
6 years ago

I reckon I could actually surf for the Iran team, still have a passport too

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago
Reply to  David

…do it. I was just up in Indo and surfing with a guy who might qualify for Algeria. He’s pretty handy, but let’s just say Gabby’s still a safe bet. How much fun would it be!?!

David
David
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

would be such a claim!

ST
ST
6 years ago

Way too drunk Chas! How olds that news piece? Comp finished over a month ago and he was not the top European finisher. Pretty sure it was Frederico.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago
Reply to  ST

Oh wow. Sorry!

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
6 years ago

The Ben Fucking Stokes
Of surfing makes me dream of
A borderless world

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago
Reply to  Eddie Haiku

Dreams without borders
Can ride the line of wonder
Surfboards are the way

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
6 years ago
Reply to  Eddie Haiku

do you think stokes is welcome back in NZ after the last couple of months?

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
6 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

Red Headed Traitors
Are welcomed with open arms
By the Long White Cloud

Mads Naeraa
Mads Naeraa
6 years ago

Denmark.

Here are two of my hard-rocking ancestors before a comp at the local. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
6 years ago
Reply to  Mads Naeraa

is there a Denmark in Pennsylvania?

Mads Naeraa
Mads Naeraa
6 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

We’re everywhere!

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
6 years ago
Reply to  Mads Naeraa

Shit, is that Pottz in the left? I thought he was
a British Saffa?

timsluis
timsluis
6 years ago
Reply to  Mads Naeraa

Ah, the original Neckbeard from the Channel Islands

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago

Is he in?

M.
M.
6 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Provisionally not.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago

In the story of the Olympics and of our generation I shall find and claim Atlantis and wreak havoc in the repechage rounds.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

I called you and Mazz for the Olympics the other night not knowing how close I was

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Could you sponsor my only slightly better half?
She’s half flip half jap
And she can prone not very well.
Don’t need cash just send gear.

longtom
longtom
6 years ago

I haven’t listened to the poddy, can someone summarise the Drew Kampion beef for me?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

Drew is a bit long in the tooth and suffers from the good old days.
Sounds jealous of Chas and his lifestyle.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

In short, Drew is probably unaware he has a new stalker.

Brutus
Brutus
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

who?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
6 years ago

I’m going to break the cardinal rule of surfing at a point break and paddle around everyone to get to the point. Surf Splendor published the Drew Kampion podcast on Wednesday, yourself and David recorded on Friday. On second listening, you already knew what Drew had said about you. Before David said anything you were feigning surprise that Drew wasn’t rotting in a grave. And straight away when DLS reiterated what Drew had said you were on the offensive! Hoping I’m wrong, nothing bores me more than Miki Dora-esque posturing!

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago

Not true! I had seen that DLS had interviewed Kampion but not listened. DLS and I never ever speak or text outside microphone. Literally don’t even say hi when we meet unless mic is on. I had no idea!

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Lies upon lies
I like it!
A true journalist!

East of the 5
East of the 5
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Barrel or nah?
Podcast-only friends (I don’t podcast, but I have drugs-only friends…)

Superworm
Superworm
6 years ago

*301 redirect to Yago Dora.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

Which brings us back to that pillow fight at the surf expo.
The person with camera was pretty fucking lucky to capture it start to finish.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago
Reply to  Gino

And can we discuss Slater and that fucking lame video at the pool.
Act 1, scene 4.
No way is anybody that fucking weak, I’d argue it’s part of all the WSL wanting us to believe he’s a pussy to drag us into his world again.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago
Reply to  Gino

He definitely appeared strange with the unemployed office worker looking false guru bloke and the earnest spinner chick ‘guiding’ him so who knows….
Did he come across as completely lame and weak ?
Hell yes
Goodness knows why they’d think it’d drag anyone back to really give a shit about him though, if anything I reckon it’ll put more off him.
Though of course, ya actually bloody right, they’ll be trying to gather any sympathy possible to get him a shot at the Olympics, and all the new understanding office worker adult learners and their children will be praising him for being open and honest with his feelings and hold him as a beacon, a lighthouse in the storm to lead them to safety and “fun”…

Gino
Gino
6 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Funny how his own creation is what exposed his decades of a facade.

If he doesn’t visit here,he has to of heard through the grapevine that BG is laughing at him.
Wonder if his inner circle will ice out BG.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago
Reply to  Gino

I doubt he gets to hear anything negative about himself and perhaps doesn’t even know that BG exists

Gino
Gino
6 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

True

timsluis
timsluis
6 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Nah, he knows. He called Chas out publicly over the Backwards Fin Billboard last year.

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
6 years ago
Reply to  Gino

not sure if you have noticed but ass-tonne has cameras on him pretty much all the time these days. I am guessing Charlie should be getting some of the credit for that. he launched chas’ glasses. chas launched his career.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

Nah..to be honest, I really don’t know anything about him aside from the expo. I did however wonder if he had a beer in him when they went at it.


54
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x