I actually listened!
God bless Drew Kampion and I mean that seriously, honestly, with every ounce of passion in my fucked up heart and, truly, I am three sheets to the wind right now on Grey Goose (thanks to the Florida Surf Film Festival founders Kevin Miller and John Brooks who brought a bottle over recently buy tickets here (if it ain’t already sold out)) and La Croix Berry (which I hate but was just at Target buying daughter and her best friend toys because I just just got paid from Lonely Planet for contributing to their epic Epic Surf Breaks of the World book which will indeed be epic because I think Finnegan, Warshaw, George, Etc. have entries and remembered I had no mixer and La Croix Berry was the only anything besides Coca-Cola Target had at its self-checkout checkout.)
But I actually, really listened to the entire Drew Kampion x David Lee Scales podcast and God bless him (Drew Kampion… not David Lee. He shaves his balls).
Drew Kampion, for the surf culture tourist, was the man who put the “journalist” in “surf journalist” and is epic. Almost as epic as the epic surf breaks of the world but I’m serious(ly fucked up) but also serious.
Drew Kampion hates me for such perfect reasons but also hates me for the wrong perfect reasons. The evil threatening force he perceives, he fears, is not fucked up-ness but rather the Wall of Positive Noise. That is surfing’s great enemy and if we don’t beat it back now we are done. Surfing is done. Surfing becomes a purely athletic pursuit.
A purely athletic pursuit layered with layers and layers of whitening toothpaste smiles.
No?
Disagree?
Tell me why because I refuse to become old (mentally).
I’m going to my Pacific Northwest soon and forcing Drew into the water but until then…
…I forgot.
*This message was brought to you on the wings of Grey Goose.
that was the weirdest voicemail I’ve gotten so far…..
vodka isle?
thats a thing?
need a tissue?
I know mate
I couldn’t believe what they were coming out with
I felt like I was so straight edge.
“Tell me why because I refuse to become old (mentally)”
christ in a sidecar.
I am kid because I can tell by what you write that you dont surf?
insecure a bit?
maybe you and scott can get together and play video games.
I dunno. I’m not a jaunty sailor type.
Aren’t there laddery / net things to go out on sometimes?
No names so I’m all good
You’ll need more than one bag, and make them big…
Bookie?
You are the wings beneath my goose.
I meant Drew Kampion, but good luck with the rehab.
Brain luffing is a fantastic phrase! Is it an LGR original? If so very, very well done.
“wasted your whole life on surfing”
do you surf or have you ever?
none of your comments here seem to indicate you have.
I hope that Eddie Haiku has saved all his works. Those should be compiled into a book.
does Mr Marcus have input in the lonely planet guide. be a good fit I reckon. comes across as very lonely.
If you are referring to the Brazilians, I don’t think this bunch are actually catholic.
Bourbon when it’s warm out, cognac when it’s colder.
writing for a lonely planet surf guide? you are absolutely part of the problem you rail against
Chas has to make a living cashing in so he can provide us this pure gold in his free time.
hold on a second. I thought he was paid by Ziff for BG. was that fake news?
I’m sorry. I revealed the secret spots of Bells, Puerto Escondido and Ditch Plains.
150+ dollar ticket for parking without the ($400) non resident parking permit, 3 hours from civilization, and yet somehow ditch was more crowded than a rush hour subway car last weekend. still can’t help myself and brave the crowd a few times a year. winter can’t come soon enough.
Maybe the WSL is right? Surfing a trillion dollar future growth market?
stay in brooklyn, its much more civilized. go to long beach.
the parking fee is so high so that locals can still find a parking spot after work.
locals dont pay to park, the fee is an attempt at limiting free loaders
fair enough. i grew up on eastern LI surfing ditch sometimes but mostly hamptons beach breaks. parents still out there but i’d be beyond priced out in montauk even if i could find a job out there. think the millionaire weekenders who can afford property there have more of a claim?
EDIT: i’m not against the parking fee, just surprised at how many people pay it or take the ticket… and “civilization” was ironic…
Cool, unfortunatly the beach breaks have been shitty for awhile now. they used to be great on certain swells.
that has increased the ditch crowd since there is no where else breaking often.
I had to leave. place is ruined. was back this summer. yuk!
I grew up surfing the jetties mostly, honestly. but they dont break good anymore either.
those rich people dont even blink at a 150$ ticket and they spend 400$ on dinner out there.
peace
where did you decamp to? summer is really not worth it, but it’s been a real good fall so far
Hawaii.
I actually caught the hurricane humberto swell right before i left.
broke my board, that sucked, but was nice to surf out there again.
i saw the footage of long beach last swell.
looked killer.
nice, i heard you get some waves there too. humberto was my favorite swell of the season. i was out at [spot redacted] friday and saturday, wonder if we were surfing the same break.
thank you for not naming spots. Friday, I was all alone at a long walk spot near where you were. thats where I broke my board. long swim in good chance we were at same spot on the saturday.
who got the “eastern California” chapter?
One of the George Bros. Can’t remember which…
what did you say about Ditch? I grew up there when it was empty. its rarely good but its always surfable. hence the 1000 hipsters clogging up the lineup
Basically that minus the growing up there part plus being very confused at seeing Danny Fuller at Surf Lodge years ago then surfing with male models.
confusing… yes but that is sort of his thing right?
can you add that it is also the only known birthing ground for great whites in the world and thats where the near by Cape Cod sharks come from and that the book Jaws was inspired by those waters. thanks
I’m just copying and pasting this for my entry and yeah totally Danny’s thing but this was maybe 9 years ago before I knew either that surf chic was a thing in Montauk or that Danny Fuller was an artist.
Got a birthing ground for Great Whites in my neighbourhood.
where? what continent?
NZ, the Hokianga. Lots of wildlife around and a Great White nursery. Lots of encounters but no attacks
cool info thanks.
As long as they don’t mention Lemoore,we should be ok.
What’s that thing where you go waaaay out on a pole thing to lean out and help stop your boat from tipping over in the wind?
Hiking out, but the above use of luffing is a perfect match of a sailing term and Chas’s drunken rambling.
Yes I get the luffing part. But I also love that ideas of juuuuuust being in control enough not to keel over, and riding something by the skin of your teeth.