"He pointed out qualities of the board – the fin, nose, and leash – that could injure someone in the water."

California is a very easy state in which to be a surfer. Virtually all the beaches are public and few laws govern behavior. Oh sure it is illegal to have booze, pop fireworks, let dogs run leashless but otherwise freedom reigns. Even the surfer, grouchy and anti-social, is generally tolerated. Sometimes, over some stretches, the black ball flag flies high but it is rare and usually flying high over less than ideal waves.

The same cannot be said for surfers on the United States’ east coast where draconian laws govern every small detail of beach life. No surfing here, no surfing there, no surfing during these months, no surfing during these times.

Well, the Cape Ann Surfers Union in Gloucester, Massachusetts recently met with their city council in order to extend the surfing calendar where currently, per Article III subsection H-2, “Surfing is prohibited between the hours of 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. from Memorial Day to Labor Day, without the permission of the lifeguard.”

Many “pro” arguments were offered. Surfing being good for health, good for the environment, good for local businesses etc.

Another non-unionized group of surfers, however, asked that the rules be kept in place seeing that our kind is degenerate and dangerous and let us go directly to the Gloucester Times for first hand reporting:

Carrying a 10-foot tall long surfboard to the podium, two local surfers expressed their concerns with the community’s safety if the requested changes were to occur.

“The surfers union, in my estimation, gave a very idealistic, fun view of surfing that was beneficial to the surf community. Not beneficial to the swimmer, beach-going community,” surfer John O’Hara said to a Times reporter following the meeting. “I am not an opposition group. I am coming from more of an educational and safety point of view.”

He pointed out qualities of the board – the fin, nose, and leash – that could injure someone in the water.

“Between nine and ten (in the morning), the beach crowd increases significantly,” O’Hara said. “So by extending that to 11 a.m., to me, is incredibly dangerous.”

Other long-time surfers agree.

“Good Harbor is not a surf destination, unless you plan on visiting Addison Gilbert (Hospital),” Gloucester resident Paul Feenie said.

I agree with John O’Hara. Any board longer than 5’11 is not only dangerous but evil and the city council should take them out and try to sink them all in the Atlantic and if they don’t sink that means the long boards are witches and should be burned at the stake.

A fine little town called Salem is just a stone’s throw away and the burning can be done there.

"Very hesitant and extremely careful."

It has been almost one year since Sunny Garcia, 2000 World Champion and six-time Triple Crown winner, was hospitalized in Portland, Oregon after a reported suicide attempt. He had been found unconscious at his home. A few months later, to the surprise of doctors, he began breathing on his own and responding to stimuli, after being taken off sedation and the family reported progress with his condition but then all communication suddenly ceased.

Yesterday, on the Instagram page @prayforsunny, Sunny’s daughter Kaila wrote:

I know it’s been a long almost six months since the last time I posted anything and there is a reason for that. I just wanted to explain briefly why there have been no updates on my dad. I just wanted to say how grateful and thankful we are for all of your love and prayers for my dad through these last ten months! Prayer is so strong and

I know it works! God is so good and though the pain of what has happened to our dad has been excruciating and unexplainable we know that God has a plan for him.

We have been very hesitant and have to be extremely careful with what we say that pertains to our dad. I have asked one of our attorneys if it was OK to explain why we have not been allowed to update anyone on our dad.

We have been told we are not allowed to give out any information to anyone about our dad anymore. And that’s why the updates stopped.

I’m sorry it has to be this way because I know there are so many of you who love and care for my dad including those of you who have known my dad for 30-40 years or longer and are so eager just to know how he is doing. We wish things were different but this is the reality of this situation for now.

Thank you all again so much for all your continuous prayers! Please please continue to pray for our dad!

Certainly cryptic and, with no other reporting, difficult to parse. Respecting the family’s privacy is important but the desire for information also understandable. Sunny is, of course, a legend and well-loved in our surfing world and many have donated to the family’s medical expense fund in order to pay for the myriad expenses associated with his ongoing treatment. The most surprising donation came from Percy “Neco” Padaratz, who fled Pipeline in 2007 after he hassled hell out of Sunny in their Pipe Masters heat. On the beach, Neco jumped a fence and climbed into the relative safety of the judges’ tower and was given a police escort back to his house.

"Fifteen years ago you got out of the water and drank a beer."

But when you think of this, our current epoch of professional surfing, are you happy? Filled with joy? Positivity? Or do you quietly mourn that once upon a time when surfers were curse-mouth’d derelicts?

You know my position.

Cocaine (buy here).

But where do you stand? In front of your still wall-tacked poster of Andy Irons?

On a SUP with visions of Kai Lenny dancing through your head?

Somewhere in between?

Well, there is no doubt that surfing as a “sport” has cleaned right on up but who is to blame/credit with squeaky cleanness?

According to The Economist our eyes belong on Gabriel Medina and let’s absorb this hot take quickly.

Gabriel Medina, arguably the best surfer in the world, grew up in Maresias, a coastal town in Brazil known for its white sand and rolling waves. As a child in the early 2000s, he watched his fellow Brazilians compete in the world surf championships in Hawaii. They were known as “small-wave surfers”: scrappy but second-rate. Australians and Americans took home all the trophies.

That changed in 2014, when Mr Medina’s daring aerials and cut-throat competitiveness led him to victory. His generation, called “the Brazilian storm”, professionalised the sport. “Fifteen years ago,” says his trainer, Allan Menache, “you got out of the water and drank a beer.” Adriano de Souza, a Brazilian surfer who went pro before Mr Medina, introduced unprecedented discipline. Cross-training (eg, swimming and yoga) gave him and his compatriots an edge.

Etc.

And hmmmm.

Do you agree?

I’m going to blame/credit a combination of Kelly Slater and polo-shirt-tucked-in-to-light-blue-demin-held-together-by-braided-belt Dirk Ziff.

I’m going to call it “synergy.”

But you?