Problem solved!
But how poor has this Coronavirus Apocalypse made you and whom do you blame? City officials frothing with newfound powers, closing businesses, parks, beaches, etc. just because they can? State officials making obscene plays for the presidencies and prime ministerships? Presidents and Prime Ministers frozen by fear or China, where this novel disease was first synthesized and released out into the world?
The surf industry, made even poorer than you and I, might never fully recover from this blow. Dirk Ziff, owner of professional surfing and co-Waterperson of the Year, could easily pack his remaining pennies and skulk off. Erik Logan, professional surfing’s chief executive, could continue his dream of becoming Instagram famous. Rip Curl, Quiksilver, Volcom could shut doors and congratulate themselves on a few fun decades. Board builders could go back to doing it part-time alongside long haul trucking.
Well, what if that same surf industry got progressive, like the Germany’s largest newspaper Bild and simply invoiced China for damages?
On Wednesday in an article titled “What China owes us,” the newspaper created an itemized invoice of damages from the pandemic. The items on the list included €24 billion in lost tourism revenue from March to April, €7.2 billion in losses for the German film industry, €1 million per hour in costs for Lufthansa, and €50 billion in lost profits for German small businesses.
The total losses came to a total of €149 billion, which the newspaper estimated caused a 4.2 percent drop in Germany’s GDP. It said that such a drop would amount to a loss of €1,784 per person.
That same day, the Chinese Embassy in Berlin responded by claiming that the estimate of damages printed in the newspaper “stirs up nationalism, prejudice, xenophobia, and hostility to China.”
How did editor-in-chief Julian Reichelt respond?
In a searing open letter to China’s President Xi Jinping.
Very fine, inspired, and if Germany’s bill equals €149 billion what do you think the surf industry is owed?
€149 and seven bars of Sticky Bumps wax?
€1490 and a promise from Fernando Aguerre to apologize for all his “Olympic” antics?
€14,900 and an artistically powerful piece of artwork featuring Dirk Ziff kissing Harv Weinstein?
€149,000 and enough Hurley skin toner to keep Erik Logan looking sharp all year?
Other ideas?