The future is now.
Architectural renderings are such wonderfully utopian works of art, no? There’s something about the aspirational quality, the gauzy haze, the real-yet-computer-generated people standing here and there. Everyone always having a good time. Much space between parties, especially in the day of social distancing.
I’m a fan of the genre and am thrilled to showcase a just released piece featuring Kelly Slater’s recently announced Palm Springs Surf Ranch from CCY Architects, a team of “architects, interior designers, sketchers, writers, snowsliders, and motivated people united by a passionate spirit” based in Basalt, Colorado.
Per Instagram we read, “On The Boards: Located in California’s Coachella Valley, Coral Mountain resort is a next-generation recreational experience, anchored by the Kelly Slater Wave Company’s 14-acre Wave Basin.”
https://www.instagram.com/p/CADKst6lb-a/
And if you click here you will behold the most detailed description yet of the project but back to the rendering, doesn’t it make you want to book your trip immediately?
John John Florence determinedly heading out in full wetsuit even though it is Palm Springs and everyone is in shorts and a girl appears to have just gotten out of the pool in a bikini. Seabass, maybe, watching from deck with triumphant fist raised. Millennial on skateboard really cruising for a bruising. Plenty of open space. Friendly conversations here and there. Enough ethnic diversity to feel “woke” or at least “woke-ish.”
Which brings us to the real question.
How much would you pay for a condo onsite?
What about a condo three blocks away?
Clickbait title. This site is like ultra hard surf candy, because no one likes hard candy.
Palm Springs Surf Club pitch deck is making its way around. They’re already strapped for cash and who would want to throw them more given the moves they’ve made thus far in public? And now these other fools think the Valley can handle 3? The weather is near unbearable June to mid-September. No one that can afford luxury is going to spend thousands to go surf a pool in 115 degree desert heat that drops to a cool 102 at night. The weather Dec-Feb isn’t warm either. So they’re really looking at a 6 month window at best to make their money each year. Country Clubs all around the valley are bleeding membership because no one younger than 60 wants to buy into communities filled with geriatric mid-westerners and Canadians.
succinct and immaculate analysis if there ever was one.
and all those golf condos are going to be nearly free once the later boomers drop. the era of two homes is ending now if anyone can’t see it…. especially shoulder season niche properties that are unbearable in the summer.
my uncle is a classic Palm Desert golfer. rode his cart around his hood and he pointed out all the homes fetching near 7 figures. we went into the club for lunch after a round and I pointed out all the 80 year olds to which he replied “it’s so good, they’re too old to play I have the course to myself”…. which did endear him to me a bit more, BUT, the golf homes in the next ten years or one corona outbreak within the gated walls will create so much inventory for sale prices will plummet for the stucco and dry homogonous “homes” that really only appeal to snowbirds. that era is fucking over.
Don’t tell Derek. He’s already trying to get to Orlando for a ‘CJ’s sex-meth neighbour’ session. He’ll be having to put together a whole itinerary.
Completely complimentary. I’m a) a dad, so anything that can elicit groans from the audience is good, and b) part of the commentariot ‘wall of positive noise’ team.
I made my 13 y/o son laugh from a dad joke the other day and he’s mortified that I “got him”. He’s on high alert now to suppress any laughter and rather cue the groan and eye roll.
How are you holding up with the no booze, high level quarantine, brother JP?
Ups and downs, ups and downs.
There are big hints that our overlords are going to treat us less like naughty children quite soon = booze + flexible exercise time. But still a fucken curfew!!!
I don’t think surfing will be explicitly allowed for a while still. Holding cells here are hellholes, so there’s massive disincentive against a sneaky paddle. Our police are generally corrupt and unaccountable at the best of times, let alone under these police state regulations and being encouraged by the police minister to crack down hard – you just don’t want to be on the wrong side of some barely-literate fucker who’s having a bad day. I always have my phone at the ready to record any interactions if I’m stopped for any reason. Crazy times.
I got a “that was actually a pretty good one Dad” the other day from my 14yo. The only other time I would get any credit would be when he takes the jokes to school and I would get the reports on how successful the jokes were. It ain’t much of a living, but it’s honest work.
BG should crowd fund and buy whichever one has the most imposing frontage and time share it out with us cunce.
Forget the Volcom House
the BG Coral Mountain Condo is where Kelly will pop in to mind fuck future world champs and the cocaine is served poolside après barrel..
Eugene in full flight
#kellyslaterisasuperpolluter
True to its color – all I see are white surfboards.
Hell get epsteined.
hulurlulurley
I miss ChannelBottom!
It’s about 8 bucks for a pack of 6 Condos
Which is about a 10 year supply for me…of course I am way past my prime now
Back in the 80s I was so prolific I had a condo sponsorship from Ansell…was riding a quiver of condo shaped boards
The ribbed model worked surprisingly well, particularly in sloppy conditions
I like wearing them while having a beat
Lasts longer.
Coooming? https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Can you imagine the CCY crew reading all this back in the office?
No doubt about it…if we do escape the grips of pandemic hell anytime soon and places like this have early success, the vultures at Vail Resorts, Intrawest, Peak Resorts, etc. will swoop in and help in turning surfing into the unaffordable yuppie milquetoast embarrassment they’re 3/4 of the way done doing to snowboarding in North America.
pro surfings resident antisemite, MICK!
There it is. That’s the comment we deserve.
Hopefully the multiple wavepools will coax the VALs to this scorched wasteland and away from the beach.
At least everyone will know where to go for water in 20 years after SoCal fully dries out.
Definitely! The rise of the wave pools in Palm Springs/Coachella will add fuel to the already heated battle over water rights down there.
Will Kelly be bulldozing the Californian koala equivalent?
Trailer Parks full of meth babies?
Haaa!
Look at that arsehole on the balcony punching his fist into the air. A modern surfer without doubt.
Haha! Totally!
Did that baggy you found the other day find companionship?
Yes, not proud of myself but that’s normal..
Wax out, fins first, leash dragging, gawky looking wetsuit despite the warm conditions. All Jon needs is a pair of thongs (flip flops) to complete the total VAL aesthetic
Rubbah Slippas, Haole.
Jandals (Japanese sandals)
Socks on or GTFO…
Which one of you humorless bastards down voted a Haole making fun of other Haoles???
Tevas. That’s what they wear in Arizona. At Rick Kane’s homebreak.
Have I been carrying my board incorrectly all these years!??!
Yes
That is a bummer..
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
superb.
we are from France
we consume mass quantities
The all seeing Kelly!
Did anyone else catch this on Kellys Insta and the exchanges he had with people accusing him of illuminati ties and subsequent debate about God and Satan existing? https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
God no.. But how I wish I had! This picture tells me all I need to know. Illuminati as fuck.