Matuse.
Matuse.

This latest decline and fall of western civilization will someday be tied back to the short-sleeved 2 mm full wetsuit!

Decadence.

We all feel it, see it, shaking ground under our feet, thick cracks in the once impossibly strong foundation of western civilization. It’s over, again, just may take a few weeks to fully teeter into collapse. Someday historians will look back into the crystal clear 2010-2020 and be able to finger where it went wrong.

Decadence.

It’s always wild, over the top decadence that sends once strong empires crumbling to the ground.

Rome burning while Nero danced with a new-fangled fiddle.

Marie Antoinette prancing through King Louis’s court smeared with fruity cakes and multi-colored macaroons.

Decadence but what is the high-water mark of decadence betwixt 2010-2020?

No.

It is the short-sleeved 2mm full wetsuit.

Has there ever been such a creation so perfect yet meeting such a tiny window of “necessity?”

Water temperatures a smidge above normal 3/2 fulls. Water temperatures just a sliver below jacket and trunks.

A tiny window of roughly 1.5 degrees.

When I surf in my Matuse 2 mm short-sleeved full (currently sold out) I feel like the Dauphine himself and I gaze around the lineup at multiple other Dauphines and think, “We’re fucked.”

No?

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East of the 5
East of the 5
6 years ago

I equate my SS full to wearing a nice suit with a short sleeve dress shirt & tie. I makes zero sense. Nonetheless my new Xcel SS full came in the mail yesterday and I will probably wear it tomorrow. My arms will be tan, but cold. My friends will make fun of me because I had it special ordered in “flesh” color so I look buck naked from a distance. Should be a hit with the misses also….

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

True dat.
Well done Chas.I’ve always looked at these as a unicorn.

Very popular in Sydney, yet you never even see one on the rack down here in Vic

Uneducated
Uneducated
6 years ago

I am in the final stages of inventing the most dynamic and advanced wetsuit of all time
I call it the 3skin. It’s made from 1000 Jewish foreskins…seamless and zipperless. When you want to put it on and take it off, just rub it furiously and it stretches, then it shrinks again when put in the cold.
Just make sure you don’t piss in it…it causes infections

VP
VP
6 years ago

You don’t understand the SS full because … wait for it … you’re not the center of the universe. Surprising, I know. East Coast, Spain, France all employ that suit with abundant frequency. Decadence says you, utilitarian says I.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

I wear full length arm and leg active wear every time I go out in summer
And I hardly ever go out in winter.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago

Hey mate [email protected] is my current email address. I got locked out of my [email protected] account.

I had a good chat to Morgan recently. Feel a bit bad about the email addresses but life goes on.

Cap'n Crunch
Cap'n Crunch
6 years ago

Upvote?

Wilbur
Wilbur
6 years ago
Reply to  Cap'n Crunch

Best comment I’ve read anywhere!

Otto
Otto
6 years ago

If that Matuse 2mm short-sleeved full had a V neck would you change your tune?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago
Reply to  Otto

Oh it’s my favorite suit I have for 10 important days of the year already. With a V? I’d suffer further into middle autumn. It hurts to be pretty.

Otto
Otto
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

It’s not essential to be pretty anymore.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago
Reply to  Otto

Damn it. What was all that suffering for?

Otto
Otto
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

To find the humbleness necessary to buy the mid-length.

The Plowking
The Plowking
6 years ago

I’d like a 3/2 long armed spring for Vic shoulder seasons.
I’m probably in the 0.0005% that would require said suit though.

longtom
longtom
6 years ago
Reply to  The Plowking

my dream

Choc
Choc
6 years ago
Reply to  longtom

This one is 2.5mm! I highly recommend for winter in your parts. That’ll cost you 1 set wave next time I see you at the point and $180.

https://needessentials.com/…

Twinnie
Twinnie
6 years ago
Reply to  The Plowking

yep. wind chill is worse than water temp.

Choc
Choc
6 years ago
Reply to  The Plowking

In case you didn’t see my reply to Longtom. Do yourself a big favor and order from here. Not quite 3mm but pretty dam close at 2.5…

https://needessentials.com/…

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago

I can’t imagine how tough it would be having to think about whether I remembered to shave my arsehole before each surf.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

Boardies to boardies and vest to Short arm 2mm to Steamer. Perfectly acceptable.

Though for some unknown reason I recently decided to go long arm short leg. It Fucken sucks and has probably accounted for more than a few fertility issues.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

The doctor found a lump in my left nut a few weeks ago. I had to go get an ultrasound and everything. Had the cancer dilemma etc. Turns out I basically had a varicose vein in my ballsack. Most likely due to the wetsuit pinching off my ball every now and then. The only way to fix it is surgery which is not worth it. It doesn’t bother me that much just a bit sore. Anyway. You should ditch that wetsuit mate they actually do damage. I used to love having my nuts sucked but that’s pretty much done now.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

Not to mention they horribly contrast my hideously white and gangly pins with my ever enveloping gut.

Thanks Wigs, you’ve sold it for me. Gonna go sit the little guys in a saucer of warm milk now

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

That’s the way. Go make wifey a cup of tea.

Wilbur
Wilbur
6 years ago

I call that an oyster shooter when your nut pops in and out.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Mine are sensitive too but little nibbles and licks..
Did you hear Pete Mel talking about you?

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago

Na what did he say?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

You’re his favorite.
Chas was the special guest.
It’s called Any Kine
Starring Pete and that guy who rooted madonna

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
6 years ago

Thanks mate. Will have to check out what this dog is saying about me.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Don’t get too excited
If you blink you’ll miss it.
Still, he did express thy name.

Noncompetitor
Noncompetitor
6 years ago

The Artist Formerly Known As Kaipo Guerrero

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

Ouch.
I had no idea what a fissure was until the Drs finger almost sent me to the moon.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

In Victoria it is steamer to boardies for that one hot day of the year, then back to steamer.
Machos might wear a spring suit for a few weeks.

The Plowking
The Plowking
6 years ago

Yeah naah.
Long armed spring with a thermal rashie most of summer with a plain old springy on the hot days.
Plenty warm

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

True.

Saw a body surfer once at the Gunnery with boardies in winter

frank
frank
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Long arm short leg works good for short dudes, like myself, I think only tall people can pull off the short arm look.
I bought a 3/2 on sale, then had a wetsuit maker chop the legs and sew on cuffs. I only wear it like once a year. Dang, now that I think about it, I am totally decadent!!!

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

It’s one I can’t understand unless water is warm and wind is very cold.

longtom
longtom
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

thats the sich here.

Twinnie
Twinnie
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

So you can understand it.

BleekBleek
BleekBleek
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Makes perfect sense for our Sunny Coast winter mornings. That’s the most rubber need up here.

Bush
Bush
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

You honestly went the long arm short leg? You kook! Was is it a peak? its supposed to be a boogie board only thing I thought.

Choc
Choc
6 years ago
Reply to  Bush

If you get a good one it’ll get you through most winter days on the east coast from Sydney north. So much faster and easier to take off then a steamer

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  Choc

I’m still rocking a Quikky one I bought in the late 80s. Mostly black, so it doesn’t look unfashionable. The neoprene in the shoulders has just started falling to bits this winter…

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago
Reply to  Bush

I know, I know. Perhaps the greatest testament to its shittyness is the fact I accidentally left it at a busy beach Car park and when I went back three hours later it was still there


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