Florida surfer-parents get lambasted for smoking “joints as big as cigars” while children learn from home: “You can’t do that!”

Florida teachers not happy.

It is difficult enough to be a surfer-parent, balancing the needs of young children with favorable swell reports, planned boat trips to the Ments with “da crew” etc. and now, with Covid keeping those young children learning at home, sucking up precious bandwidth typically dedicated to gazing at sunbathers on the beach etc. it is downright impossible.

Well, Floridian surfer-parents have discovered a solution.

Smoking “joints as big as cigars” while their young children finish online math tutorials and also drinking heavily.

Floridian teachers, obvious downers, are not happy.

Edith Pride, who teaches at Boca Raton Elementary School told Fox News:

“We need to make sure parents don’t get on the computer to help their children with joints in their hand and cigarettes in their mouth. Sometimes the joints are as big as cigars. You can’t do that! We’ve seen the parents in towels, we’ve seen them in underclothes, we’ve seen them in bras. It’s just inappropriate. The children can see it in the squares.”

Pride brought up her concerns at the school board meeting and other teachers chimed in with stories of 11 am beer drinking, partying and whatnot.

Surfer-parents have never been known for decorum but what are they to do? What solutions can there be?

Elysa Grossman, a Johns Hopkins University professor, and Susan Sonnenschein, at University Maryland Baltimore Campus, conducted a poll earlier this year and discovered that stressed parents are drinking more during the coronavirus pandemic, to say nothing of stressed surfer-parents.

“We found that parents who are stressed by having to help their children with distance learning during the COVID-19 pandemic drink seven more drinks per month than parents who do not report feeling stressed by distance learning. These stressed parents are also twice as likely to report binge drinking at least once over the prior month than parents who are not stressed, according to our results.”

Again, obvious but what’s the fix?

Where’s the solve?

Should local surfer-parents get together and form a collective where the children learn in one room while adults smoke, drink, wander nude etc. in an adjacent room with no connecting door?

What would The Dude do?

Much to ponder.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
28 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Gino
Gino
6 years ago

Im in the east as well.
Still have a few gov housing.

Mitch Bligh
Mitch Bligh
6 years ago

Why are the cameras on anyway?

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
6 years ago

Teachers not happy ? Secure career , bankers delight , Late start , early finish , lots of surf time , never ending holidays , ok kids a tough ….
but they could deal with the kids ,just like parents do, self medicating with drugs and alcohol …. responsibly of course

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
6 years ago

nailed it

SSD
SSD
6 years ago

Na na na na hey hey goodbye…..
To the privacy of your own home.
How about minding your own business Mrs Pride? Or better yet, tell the damn school board you are ready to go back to the classroom and teach in person. Our local school had everyone on board to resume teaching at school except for one teacher in his early 40s that threatened lawsuits against the district if they dared go back. Even with covid precautions, etc. His exact words were “you will be sentencing my family and I to death should the district pursue this”. I’d say fire the clown but that would cost the district at least a quarter million dollars or so.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

He could be re-educated and given a job in the public health system ?

Wilbur
Wilbur
6 years ago
Reply to  SSD

The richies in La Jolla pulled their kids from public and went private. I read enrollment in public schools is down like 40% or somethin’.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  Wilbur

Yes, and they are going full home schooling because they are homeschooling anyway.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

I have peeps with cans in their hand answering the door at 11am.

Uneducated
Uneducated
6 years ago

I think i must have been about 8 and my mum was dating a guy that was later to become my year 8 maths teacher

We stayed at his house one weekend and I guess they went out for a while and told me and my brother to tidy the house

I have no idea what may have possessed us this day…but we went berserk. Got through our bedrooms, lounge, and in to the kitchen.

I opened a cupboard door and found what I believed to be a bowl half full of chopped up dirt and grass.

Calling upon my newfound cleanliness streak…and long held need to please…i washed that shit down the sink

Standing at the door proudly when my mum and her new school teacher boyfriend arrived home I couldnt wait for them to inspect my work

“You’re kitchen was so dirty…you even had a bowl of dirt in the cupboard”

Never seen someone move so fast, he headed straight to that kitchen door

They weren’t as pleased as I had anticipated

c4
c4
6 years ago

https://uploads.disquscdn.c… Just make sure you trim your weed in a different room.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago

I wasn’t sure if I failed as a surfer, or as a parent. Now I can fail as both.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

I have to get signatures for parcels every day.
Believe me…it’s not only Floridians who get on the beers before noon.
UDLs for the real early crowd.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  Gino

I’ll put forward the idea that it is stress. Not seeing a lot of pre-noon drinkies around my postie run. That being said, and I’m going to take a risk here, I am tempted by the Bundy and sarsaparilla cans available for a limited time.

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

Stress for sure.
My drinking has ramped up with this lock down.
I’m off to Dan’s after I get off here tbh.

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
6 years ago

If this continues
We can return to the swamp
Where we all belong!

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago

Bongers/Beer drinkers
Lives
Matter…

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

For sure there are people getting deliveries who might be more than half-baked. You can tell by the sequence.
‘Knocks on door’.
‘Shuffle, scuffle, scuffle, scuffle. Curtain peels back slowly. Bloodshot eyes peer out’
“Relax dude, it’s just the postie”
“Package for …
“Oh, yeah, right. Fuck, what did I order this time. Heh, heh, heh, cough, cough, hack, hack hack…”

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
6 years ago

They were perhaps afraid is was not you , Postman Pie , but The UBER MENSCH …… Come to take them AWAY ?

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago

It’s the bloodshot eyes that give them away. Not enough time for the Visine to hook in.

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
6 years ago

I miss the constant shark stories

Dick Simmons
Dick Simmons
6 years ago

Seems the easy answer would be send them back to school. But everyone is still running around scared shitless dipped in hand sanitizer to avoid the common cold.

Otto
Otto
6 years ago

The Dude: “Listen man! The death of Ruth Bader Ginsburg cured Covid-19 man! I’m telling you, it did man. Watch the news. Covid-19 is cured man, it’s gone away. Are you hearing anything about Covid-19 anymore? Man, I’m not. Let the kids go back to school man. Hey man, you got a light?”

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
6 years ago
Reply to  Otto

And a white russian.

?uzzled
?uzzled
6 years ago

I believe he referred to the beverage as “a Caucasian”.

FL Skunk Ape
FL Skunk Ape
6 years ago

The Dude abides…

FL Skunk Ape
FL Skunk Ape
6 years ago
Reply to  FL Skunk Ape

Nah fuck it, he sparks that thing up in a bathrobe with a fresh drink

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  FL Skunk Ape

Shut up Donnie.


28
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x