John John Florence watchers, Kelly Slater, attempt to discern clues left in explosive new interview: “…and while his knee sounded like the Fourth of July, cracking and popping, he pushed through .”

Tea leaves.

Surfing’s grand debut in the Tokyo 2020 Olympics, being held in 2021, is mere weeks away and professional surf fans are growing increasingly thrilled, three questions dominating conversations and minds: How will Japan-by-way-of-Huntington-Beach’s Kanoa Igarashi take being unseated as darling by Australia’s Sally Fitzgibbons? Will John John Florence’s knee heel from his unspecified surgery in time for competition or will he cede his spot to runner-up Kelly Slater? Will Stab magazine savage the Olympics like it does the World Surf League or elevate its tone to match the gravitas of history?

On the penultimate, a new, wide-ranging interview just released today provides clues about the state of Florence’s knee but does it provide clarity?

Let us read together.

“Body’s doing good,” Florence tells The Manual, his blonde hair a trademark mess but with clear eyes. “Once you get to this three-week mark, it just gets so much better every day.”

The swelling is down, the range of motion coming back. Just today he hopped back on his Peloton bike (Florence was announced as one of nine athletes sponsored by the company in April), and while his knee sounded like the Fourth of July, cracking and popping, he pushed through. “It felt good to get my legs moving like that,” he says.

Later…

But on the day we talk surfing, we don’t speak of Slater. Instead, we talk of Florence’s own generation, his roots as a Hawaiian, and the people and places that influenced him.

Ending with…

Time is not on his side — Florence admits that if everything with his rehab goes smoothly, the earliest he’ll be back in the water would be two weeks before he’d need to fly to Tokyo for the Games. When he’s able to surf again, it will be in California waters, not Hawaiian, so as to prepare for less-powerful waves that might mimic competition conditions.

Time to sort the tea leaves.

Is a knee that sounds like the Fourth of July good? I’m no doctor, I’ll admit, but it doesn’t sound good and rehab needing to go smoothly in order for Florence to have two weeks of training also doesn’t sound good but, again, no doctor.

Also, is not talking about Slater but rather the people and places who have influenced him Florence’s way of letting Kelly know that he will not give up his slot even if injured? I think it may be a reasonable assumption to draw.

If I was going to put money on it, after reading this interview in any case, I would push it all on Florence heading to Tokyo, Slater heading to Tokyo too, and maybe Shane Stant coming as Slater’s plus one.

My professional surf journalist opinion.

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Simon Says
Simon Says
5 years ago

Ok! I’ll admit it. I read through this entire article before realizing that the whole thing is a parody on investigative journalism. Touche’ Chas! You sucked me in and then spit me out! I feel like the lobster diver swallowed by the whale!

Simon Says
Simon Says
5 years ago

JJ giving up slot: Zero chance!
California training in weaker waves: Who’s kidding who? Summer time on Oahu is ground zero for weak surf.
‘gravitas of history’: Where am I?
‘penultimate’: WTF?

diamond chief
diamond chief
5 years ago

Your frame rate is set too low

sharkguitar
sharkguitar
5 years ago

For the Dream…..BIGLY!!!

🏳️‍⚧️Alliance🏳️‍🌈
🏳️‍⚧️Alliance🏳️‍🌈
5 years ago

John John Florence seems like the next Westerly Windina.
So much media can be bogus. As a contributor for the eminent 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈 OutinPerth.com, we believe all of this stuff about John Florence’s knee is a cover story to blacklist her from coming out gay like so many celebrities are silenced, even to this day, “don’t ask don’t tell” (that John John Florence is gay).

Anything can be faked. Sorry but this is a bearding…as someone who has been in person close to John John Florence while all of this was happening “allegedly” we witnessed NO injury as a well meaning, truth oriented, investigative reporter.
As far as our network is concerned, John John’s “View From a Blue Moon” IS a gay reference to one’s bootie…
John Florence surfs like a leopard in honor of muse #Vela.
This is from Camp Friends of Florence:
#JohnFlorenceLeopard .

Like JJF’s official IMDB page, many media outlets support John Florence as transgender – this widely distributed story refers to her as Cleopatra https://beachgrit.com/2021/… .

And at least one other legitimate news source is questioning this knee surgery as possibly bogus: https://stabmag.com/news/ex…

Finally, anyone who was at Margaret River in person like I was witnessing John John Florence’s final heat can tell you she paddled in and was totally fine – didn’t even need jet ski to bring her in. Check the footage.
Soon John John Florence will be coming out there crossdressing like Westerly Windina…since she is a transsexual.
That would be great for the Olympics, even though only the insane / suicidal would support an event in the most radiation saturated part of the ocean – Fukushima.

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

JSC
JSC
5 years ago

“his roots as a Hawaiian, and the people and places that influenced him”

Still an ethnic Caucasian, not Hawaiian at all. If not a champion surfer, then “just another fukken haole” in Hawaii

Stick man
Stick man
5 years ago

***FIX THE FUCKING COMMENTS GLITCH ALREADY YOU SLACK MOTHERFUCKERS!!!***

WTF???

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
5 years ago

To owens point, I think we should make all the WCT/WQS surfers wear helmets and padded wetsuits! Gloves, and eye protection will be discussed as well. This will really protect the athletes, and provide a more entertaining opportunity for Scorn.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
5 years ago

I went to the track and field and got stared at for carrying on like it was a football match.

c4
c4
5 years ago

The heat and humidity, very few vaccinated people all trying to accommodate the visitors. Sounds like hell.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
5 years ago

The Olympics died in Sydney 2000

J H
J H
5 years ago

Sound strategy.

c4
c4
5 years ago

Haven’t been down there in years so I’m just going by the generic Mcmansions and the pro surfers.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
5 years ago

I don’t think he is going to acquire some tigers and a raging cocaine habit though.

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

Hard to waste two hundred million and end up bankrupt like Tyson haha. Respect.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

Massive respect, “I did a ton of blow and bought some tigers, the rest I just squandered.”

wincy
wincy
5 years ago

Which date should a knee sound like?

channelbottom
channelbottom
5 years ago
Reply to  wincy

1st of January

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
5 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Ha, nah day before.

channelbottom
channelbottom
5 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

But that’s not quite the K____ Y___ yet.

Stick man
Stick man
5 years ago

Florence of Rehabia.

samwaters
samwaters
5 years ago

Not many people know that the host city is the one taking all the financial risks– while the dudes running the IOC are almost guaranteed a return in the billions from the television rights, licensing, etc.

Black Rubber
Black Rubber
5 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

Except everyone knows that. But thanks for being smarter than everyone else and enlightening all of us with your unique knowledge.

Fukkada Bong
Fukkada Bong
5 years ago
Reply to  Black Rubber

Sam must believe that all Olympians are drug-free too.

Fukkada Bong
Fukkada Bong
5 years ago
Reply to  Fukkada Bong

Or is he going to tell us the secret that not many people know that basically all of them are fully juiced up?

samwaters
samwaters
5 years ago
Reply to  Black Rubber

Your welcome, and I don’t think everyone knows it, but the media and Japan are doing pretty good job right now getting the word out.
Dude, these IOC executives are making Barracudas and Great Whites look tame.

Black Rubber
Black Rubber
5 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

Those guys are chicken shit compared to FIFA

diamond chief
diamond chief
5 years ago

My mom owning a house at pipeline with a spare room would make me feel “set for life”

GBP
GBP
5 years ago

Would the team coach get the final say in this? I would have thought so in most sports.

And if so where do simpos allegiances lie? Slater hater or gushing of the wrinkly master?

samwaters
samwaters
5 years ago

Uhh, he doesn’t need the money, he’s already set for life.
And he doesn’t seem to like the limelight, or the public screwtiny– I think he’ll pass.

Dovakin
Dovakin
5 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

I find it cute how y’all have such romantic views of JJF.

ricmatic
ricmatic
5 years ago
Reply to  Dovakin

He’s the new Curren

Brutus
Brutus
5 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

nah JJF has a lot more interests other than surfing…compared to Tom JJF is an extrovert ..

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
5 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

I liked his old stuff better than his new stuff

ricmatic
ricmatic
5 years ago

I used to watch em at the Manzil Room

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
5 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

If you survived The Manzil
You’ll survive anything.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
5 years ago
Reply to  Dovakin

I know right.
Hed be a useless cunt at a party.

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

He just put up an IG post today of himself on his Peloton bike that he has a paid contract with and also a link to buy the same vitamins he is using for his recovery. Seems like more of a sellout than Slater honestly. Slater never put some poison energy drink sticker on his board like John John.

Brutus
Brutus
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

yeah but Kelly spruik beers , but doesn’t drink beer , Firewires are very cheap construction sold for top$ worldwide /green wash as they do not last! Then there’s his surf tub that uses so much water in a drought stricken Cal, a finacial disaster and plans in Australia Kelly is spruiking to build his new pool project on wetlands…….

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

I don’t know about the beer stuff, must only be in Australia but everything else has been his own startups. So for me that’s less of a sellout even if the things he does aren’t that great for the environment.

Edit: You’re right on the beer thing. Super bowl ad.

Brutus
Brutus
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

you can actually argue Kelly is the anti-christ of Surfing’s commercial business’s…..consistent failure!!!

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

He’s lucky the WSL was stupid enough to buy his wave pool, somehow though I have a feeling we’ll be seeing a John John Florence soft top in the future.

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
5 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

If only he would have followed the successful formula you used. Maybe you could give him a little advice, seeing how well you’ve done!?

Brutus
Brutus
5 years ago
Reply to  ValiantScorn

WTF would you know you dog fucker ……I have no assets if that ‘s what you mean , why don’t you fuck off back to kandahahaha…….and rape some kiddies!!!

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
5 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

And the most pathetic

goofyfoot
goofyfoot
5 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

Don’t hold back brutus

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
5 years ago
Reply to  ValiantScorn

Best ever rebuttal

Brutus
Brutus
5 years ago
Reply to  Capt Sensible

talking personal bullshit about me because , fucken Tall Poppy syndrome , I don’t even own a car …..LOL


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