Caio Ibelli, seconds after God interfered with judges' computer panels to send his fav boy through.

Swimmer “taken” by suspected Great White shark at popular Western Australian beach on twenty-one year anniversary of horror shallow-water attack at nearby Cottesloe, “We got out to get a look from a high vantage point and as soon as we did we saw a massive shark out in the water!”

Man swimming fifty feet from the beach disappeared by suspected Great White.

A male swimmer is missing after being hit by what witnesses described as a “massive” shark at Port Beach, a dozen clicks or so west of Perth. 

A chopper and marine rescue crews are searching for the man who was swimming fifty feet offshore when witnesses say he was “taken” by what was, likely, a Great White shark. 

Three ambulances are waiting in the carpark. 

A witness told the West Australian he and his pals had been surfing when a man in a dingy “came flying at us and screamed at us to get out of the water because there’s been a shark attack”.

Witness Kaiden Boult told the West, “We scurried out onto the rocks as soon as we got out to get a look from a high vantage point and as soon as we did we saw a massive shark out in the water. It was very big. Next thing you know there’s cops and paramedics coming out of everywhere, and they cordoned it off and said it was a crime scene.”

Another witness told WAToday he saw the man being circled by the shark before disappearing. 

The attack came on the twenty-first anniversary on the twentieth anniversary of Ken Crews’ horror death in a Great White shallow water attack at nearby Cottesloe Beach. 

Attacks by Great Whites, once a wild rarity in West Oz, have become wildly common. 

Last October, surfer Andrew Sharpe was disappeared by a Great White at Kelpies, near Esperance, south of Perth; that January, an Esperance diver was hit by a Great White and three years before that, still Esperance, teenager Laeticia Brouwer was killed by a Great White in front of her family at Kelpies. 

Plenty more, of course, but y’get the picture. 

Tons of Whites. 

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Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago

It must be a parody, right?
Wrong.
https://youtu.be/iBRtucXGeNQ

snapper
snapper
4 years ago

If a beautiful 17ft Great White shark swam through the Malibu lineup tightly circling a certain pudgy man with a long john but deciding to back off in disdain…..would that make prime Beach Grit news?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
4 years ago
Reply to  snapper

If you mean a newly muscled movie star sex symbol, yes!

Firelipe Torpedo
Firelipe Torpedo
4 years ago

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Everyone blames the whites

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
4 years ago

Tough way to go, if he saw the shark circling him first. Not a fun last few minutes of life.

Wilbur
Wilbur
4 years ago

On BBC they interviewed his wife. He was a keen 57 year old swimmer. She said the required “he died doing what he loved.’ BS. Who loves being ripped to pieces by a killing machine?

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
4 years ago

A crime scene? What laws were broken?
The only crime here is fisheries mismanagement.

Tom
Tom
4 years ago
Reply to  Urchin Sepsis

I wonder how they tape off the ocean?? How far and do they have enough tape?

AI (for ever) .
AI (for ever) .
4 years ago

Local news is reporting two sharks attacking one being a white the other a tiger.

V3 Rocket
V3 Rocket
4 years ago

If a shark with COVID tried to attack Mick Fanning, but Kelly saved him telepathically …
Would that be peak Beach Grit?

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
4 years ago
Reply to  V3 Rocket

Only if Mick was wearing a whoop and Kelly gave bone broth to the shark

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago

While Kelly believes everyone is entitled to his opinion and of course his bone broth(sick AF) I suspect the shark has other ideas for Kelly

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  V3 Rocket

World title on the line?

V3 Rocket
V3 Rocket
4 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

Yes, this would need to happen during a World Title showdown at 2ft Trestles

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  V3 Rocket

Metavigilance at work?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
4 years ago
Reply to  V3 Rocket

You’re missing Uncle Joey Hill and Ez Logan, but yeah, close.

munnstrosity
munnstrosity
4 years ago
Reply to  V3 Rocket

checks off some of the boxes but i feel a thing or 2 missing for that ellusive unicorn.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
4 years ago

Today I read an article about Tasmanian Fisheries ripping predatory Long-Spined Sea Urchins off reefs and possibly using them to make fertilizer ….
Strange how we are happy to annihilate poor little marine creatures to protect the Abalone and Lobster industry but not ……..ourselves ?
https://www.abc.net.au/news…

c4
c4
4 years ago

I took five minutes to look at the reason why there is an imbalance of sea urchins because that doesn’t happen in nature by itself.

Ecosysytems have been in balance for millions of years. Sure enough the reason is that the urchins only predator, the lobster has been over fished. Now they are calling the urchins pests that need to be killed, when the real answer is to stop over fishing lobsters.

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
4 years ago
Reply to  c4

Urchinists!

c4
c4
4 years ago
Reply to  Urchin Sepsis

You must not be happy about the crab delay. Crab for Thanksgiving was what our family had for years.

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
4 years ago
Reply to  c4

Yeah good thing we’re off the water. Now they can be killed off without witnesses by the tras Pac container fleet.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
4 years ago
Reply to  c4

Hi C4 ….. To be honest I was just trying to point out that under the current laws concerning fishing , is that it ok to stop urchins to save lobsters but not keeping Sharks away from Humans ….
So Hypothetically …..Are Urchins lives worth less than Sharks ?

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
4 years ago

I’ve been told so by many shark huggers.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

Urchin Lives Matter

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
4 years ago

Dickensian Twist …..

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago

It get’s soo Urchin.
Urchin Urchin Urchin Urchin emergency!

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
4 years ago

In Australia, it appears that Shark Lives Matter.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
4 years ago

Three million kangaroos fall under the hammer every year, ain’t much chatter ’bout that.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
4 years ago

Yep .
Hypothetically……For what reasons are certain creatures defined as a pest , representing a danger to a fishing industry , and therefore removed , while others in the same environment , ours , the earth and its oceans , should be protected at all costs , even though they represent a danger to human life ….?

joeys nosegard
joeys nosegard
4 years ago

tasty suckers them roos. if i could go to the fish shop and buy great white i’d be a pescatorian pronto

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  c4

I’d say the governments of Oz have proven to be idiotic at many levels with their handling of covid so I feel for the urchins on land and in the ocean

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  c4

Humans aren’t natural?

c4
c4
4 years ago
Reply to  Hot stuff

Sure, we can eat all the animals that taste good and exterminate all the others but that didn’t work out too well in the past. Otters and peregrine falcons etc are just now recovering around here after almost becoming extinct.

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  c4

So what, they’ll be extinct one day anyway
It’s just a matter of time.
The animals couldn’t care less

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  Hot stuff

Jebus made us,
This I know,
Becuz teh bible
Tells me so.

Travis Edgar
Travis Edgar
4 years ago

Breakfast..lunch or dinner.

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago

At least this time it wasn’t in Australia

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
4 years ago
Reply to  Hot stuff

What do you reckon they should call West Oz? New Australia? East South Africa?

turts
turts
4 years ago

The place the props up the rest of Australia’s economy.

Bloody parasitic east oz cunts

astro
astro
4 years ago
Reply to  turts

Give them hell, turts !
Fucken ANZ and WEstpac posting record profits off the back of kiwis for years. Cunts.

AI (for ever) .
AI (for ever) .
4 years ago
Reply to  turts

The Rhinehart?
Palmers paradise?

Just working on suitable new names.

Gil Gunderson
Gil Gunderson
4 years ago

Western Twiggy Sticks

turts
turts
4 years ago

Twiggy town. Palmer can just fuck right off

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
4 years ago
Reply to  turts

Nah, he’s yours now. Although, I live almost next to his ex-resort. Fucken dickhead lands his chopper every now and then, which freaks out the dog when the it is only about 50m overhead.

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago

East Wadjemuppet

janeausten
janeausten
4 years ago

South Kuta.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
4 years ago

For a while there New Durban or New Cape Town would have been apt ?

AI (for ever) .
AI (for ever) .
4 years ago

Dutchland or in keeping with its population Little London.

Chad Lebrone
Chad Lebrone
4 years ago

They’ll just go back to calling it Terra Nullius. That way they can happily keep on destroying sacred caves.

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  Chad Lebrone

Why are they sacred?

Bush
Bush
4 years ago
Reply to  Hot stuff

Why are u such a cunt?

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  Bush

Just trying to fit in

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
4 years ago

I’ll be laughing at “East South Africa” for days

Bush
Bush
4 years ago

Gods country

Bush
Bush
4 years ago
Reply to  Hot stuff

Not a fan of the west? What’s your beef?

Hot stuff
Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  Bush

Never been, its good?

Otto
Otto
4 years ago

Great Whites Union Rep: “Oh nooooo! Another Great White attack! Big whoop! Not like you humans will ever do anything to make us stop attacking you. You’re too soft hearted.”


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