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Giant “mutilated shark alien” spotted lurking off coast of Southern California causing much consternation and hand-wringing amongst SUP community!

The end of the world?

There are many odd creatures on God’s blue earth but many none odder than the ocean sunfish or mola mola. Considered the heaviest boney fish, it looks like it is missing its entire body, just head and tail and is found in tropical waters or, apparently, off the coast of Southern California where one caused much consternation and hand-wringing amongst the SUP community.

Two paddled out to examine what they first thought to be a “mutilated alien shark.”

“He’s as big as your board,” one said to another before giggling.

Odd.

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Jonah Hill-esque.

WEB EXTRA: Sunfish Gets Up Close With Paddleboarders

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14 Comments
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Yachats

That foil board without a leash is an extreme hazard to others in the water. Get it leashed or this will happen again.

Dogsnuts

Sup’ing is snorkelling and surfing for those whose don’t really like getting wet.

Barrelled

Chas,
Did you fall into a coma or deep sleep for a couple days?

Beef & Beer

Soft gums can sink molars
(that’s what my dentist said)

Ricky Spanish

Looks kinda like Jesse Miley-Dyer

Dogsnuts

Care to post any pics of yourself in revealing clothing?

Ricky Spanish

Check my onlyfans.

Otto

I don’t know. That Boston accent may be a weapon of Mass. destruction.

Beef & Beer

Luckily that’s generally a smaller portion of their regular diet.
Hence the high prices and desirability of their many pounds of flesh.
Don’t let Jonah near one (or Shylock)…

Beef & Beer

A top quality ‘table fish’ by all accounts, and worth a pretty penny in the markets of Tokyo…

Otto

I have it on good authority that that is a baby fucking whale.
https://youtu.be/r0IQCLQDfKw

Firelipe Torpedo

I remember my first ocean sunfish

Stick man

What the Hill is that?!?

Picard Madeoff

If only it had a hoodie from Jonah


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