Troubled waters.
The world has finally taken notice of surf fans, our passion, candles lit for a grand reunion between Kelly Slater and his Gisele Bündchen.
Of the power of dreams.
And candles.
Subcontinental sporting website Essentially Sports posting to its 1.3 billion fans While Surfing World Reminisces Over Gisele Bündchen’s Fling With Kelly Slater, 11x Champ Recalls Another Iconic Moment From Over A Decade Ago.
It was not his fling with Pamela Anderson but rather a win at Pipeline (I think).
In any case, much hope has led into this almost new year, Bündchen beginning to date a jiu-jitsu instructor aside, though now a revenge of the nerds hovers just over the horizon.
Jilted crypto enthusiasts threatening to sue the Brazilian supermodel, her ex-husband Tom Brady, Pete Davidson’s exes’ father Larry David and more.
Per the New York Post:
Investors not only are suing Sam Bankman-Fried, but also celebrity endorsers of his bankrupt crypto company FTX, including Tom Brady, ex-wife Gisele Bündchen, Larry David, and sports stars like David Ortiz, Steph Curry and Shaquille O’Neal.
Attorneys including star litigator David Boies filed the lawsuit on behalf of Edwin Garrison, an Oklahoma resident who had an FTX yield-bearing account which he funded with crypto assets to earn interest, and others like him.
Celebrity endorsers such as David, who filmed a Super Bowl commercial for FTX, are accused of engaging in deceptive practices to sell FTX yield-bearing digital currency accounts, the suit claims.
“Part of the scheme employed by the FTX Entities involved utilizing some of the biggest names in sports and entertainment … pouring billions of dollars into the Deceptive FTX Platform to keep the whole scheme afloat,” the lawsuit states.
As any student of marriage knows, financial stuffs make or break and here we have Slater, potentially, on the hook for billions if he marries quickly without prenup.
The 11x Champ is notoriously cheap.
Ridiculously cheap.
Will he not do the required work that it will, no doubt, take to win Bündchen’s fated hand?
Will he sacrifice his stingy for love?
More on his discounting surfboards and curb stomping domestic producers tomorrow but until then…
…no more candles. Send money to Bündchen’s legal fund instead.