But a ray of hope?
The World Surf League’s 2023 Championship Tour is three events in and what are the storylines grabbing you by the throat, floating through your dreams, or nightmares, during the sleepy hours? The dominance of the young guns like Jack Robinson, Joao Chianca, Griffin Colapinto during the first third? The fact that only one Yeti cooler has been released by Santa Monica? The who’s who club existing below the dreaded mid-season cut line?
Ahhh that’s what it is for me.
The ultimate surfer Zeke Lau, Olympic silver medalist Kanoa Igarashi, onetime-prodigy Kolohe Andino and living legend Kelly Slater all in much danger of being relegated with just two events to prove their mettle.
Yikes.
Lau is almost certainly done for. Andino in more danger than he’s ever been in for a decade. Igarashi and Slater right there, so close yet still so far.
And what will surf fans do in the absence of the man who has utterly dominated the scene for thirty-odd years? Easy to feel that nothing will change but how does anyone know? What if competitive professional surfing implodes once Slater is pushed out?
There might be one ray of light, though. The Rip Curl Pro Bells Beach is next, on the calendar, and did you know that Kelly Slater is the winningest ever surfer there, tied with Mick Fanning?
It is true.
The greatest of all-time won in 1994, 2006, 2008 and 2010.
But do you think he will dig deep and, at least, claw out of the round of 32?
It’s going to take a quarterfinal appearance to create real relief but winning at least three heats would be something.
Light a candle, please.
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It isn’t the boards. It took decades but they finally caught up to Slater’s skillset.
Can we get Sam Waters opinion on all this ??
Sure. Forgot that part. So as long as Ziffy is also bailed, the show will go on.
Slater is going along with the misapprehension that he can qualify by the designated route for the US Olympic surf team. And then retire in glory as he leads them to Gold. None of that is likely to happen as he isn’t surfing well enough. Though he might be able to wangle a wild card for the Games too. If that doesn’t work out he could find himself some long lost Italian lineage and buck Jesse Mendez off that team.
His dad was syrian according to scuttlebut. Nit sure if he’d stoop that low, but it’s a possibility!
I have noticed a bit more of a stoop since he hit 50. Needs must when the devil drives.
Uh Chas just FYI, Mark Richards has also got 4 Bells, and of course Gail has 10.
Do you even do Surf Journalism?
I LIT TWO CANDLES FOR KELLY…
outerknown walkin sticks
seriously, essential. see below/
Kel needs to stop trying to be a teenager on a 5’3″ and use the extra kegs hes carrying around to draw longer turns on a bigger board.
If he must ride a tiny board at least try something different like josh kerr on that twin fin. My god that footage blew my mind about what can be done on a twinny. No more double pump bottom turns like mick fanning, just endless carving turns like a modern day richard cram.
Finally kel is getting a taste of his own medicine being low in the draw and facing the top guys in rd 3.
He’s got more chance at bells than margarets unless they hold the entire comp at the box. Which they won’t, because the wind will come up and they’ll move it to main break and some young brazzo will destroy him with airs.
If he can get lucky he might be able to beat some lower ranked goofy footers at onshore winki and he may just scrape home against leo or caio at the bowl. But against anyone else, on those little boards hes riding… i dont like his chances.
Sounds dead on.
Slater needs to play to his strengths, just like the young mini-sized air show from Brazil has. They’re looking more powerful now, as they get older and stronger, but they didn’t get onto the CT by trying to surf like they had a different body type. They got there by wowing the crowds with what they did best.
Rob Machado bailed out a long time ago, and this allowed him to play with a ridiculous variety of boards. The WCT is really only a sliver of surfing, even for the best of the best.
A long time ago, Tom Curren paddled out into a heat on a longboard. He advanced, too. But that was clearly the point where he’d gotten bored with the whole thing.
Kelly is much more the extrovert than Machado and Curren. But he’s also a smart guy and it’s hard to imagine his mind being satisfied with doing yet another CT. But if you’re gonna do the CT, it’s not the place for riding the wrong boards.
Just not by US.
He should ride one of the boards he won it on…take it off the wall of the local surf shop or cafe/pub.
Surfing had reached a plateau, Curren and Occy were less than motivated, Kong, Cram and Carroll were gone and system surfing was winning titles. Yeah, Gerr and Pottz were diff, but there were too many Damien Hardmens (point machines). The criteria sucked, everyone knew it and there were so few guys that could paint lipstick on that pig of a tour.
The sport caught lightning when Kelly, Chris Brown and Shane Bevan broke in. Momentum Gen was a good story, but all were Kelly’s Cucks…. Brownie couldn’t travel and dunno what happened to SB. Kelly took our imaginations and put them into action.
My boards changed so much in a short period of time and not for the better. Way too tempermenta, but when they did work, you thought you had found that magic 5% improvement that you could only remember when Simon flipped the entire sports equipment switch.
Kelly was the ultimate lifestyle. I didn’t envy him, I wanted his freedom. He never went home. He won a contest and went on a surf trip in the region of his next contest. It was so pure, organic. Not only was he the best, he was the most committed to free surfing.
Won’t go into his career arc, but Occ and SUnny won lifetime achievement awards in his late 90’s absence. Shane Beschen was his only rival. The only one that had the balls to step in his way.
Kelly had Merricks and Quik money to surf trip on.
Andy arrived with enough juice to coax Kelly back into the game. That Japan contest was so sick and Kelly had to rise to the challenge. New competitive life, mirroring Curren in an odd way now that I think about it.
That’s when HUBRIS struck. After 11 Titles, the king found his mirror in Twatter and IG.
Ego forced his hand with his equipment, he could ride anything unlike Cheyne H.
How many more titles would Kelly have if he hadn’t left Al?
Trapped in a house of mirrors of social media and attention needy, he stopped free surf traveling to my knowledge. He liked scenes instead of scoring alone. His boards and his athletic magic began to work at fewer venues, but thrived in consequence which may have supported his equipment decision to some degree. Yeah, he has Pipe, Cloudie and Chopes wired, who cares about Bells?
Well, now he cares about Bells.
“How many more titles would Kelly have if he hadn’t left Al?”
One.
Can’t say that because we don’t know. You’re logic is, he was close to one on terrible board choices.
He needs to switch and you know it.
Pre baldness kelly was a sight to behold, and he was unstoppable.
But yeah those banana boards of the early 90s only worked in high performance waves. History has judged them as a design dead end. And fuck they held an entire generation of surfers back.
such a nice write-up – that’s pretty much the way it went down for me too. I lit a candle for Tom Curren when he was on his way out but that never stopped him and I’m guessing it’ll go the same way for Slats. I do wish him to be surfing as awesome as Curren does in Free Scrubber when he hits that age too.
How sad is pro surfing as a sport when a 50 year old veteran is the most exciting news it has going ?
Imagine having to roll out Mike Jordan or Bjorn Borg to keep your fan base
How sad that they don’t get that kids aren’t interested in anyone over the age of 25, and kids are the only market that pro surfing has got. This is not golf or tennis where old cunts will watch the events and buy the shit the advertisers are selling.
Pro surfing was awesome when there were wild guys like Martin Potter and Matt Archbold with wild hair doing wild things on surfboards. Interesting that when Kelly arrived he was the damp squib who didn’t drink or smoke or do drugs. All the pros thought he was soft in the jocks until they found out that he was just so much better than them regardless.
If only Kelly didn’t go bald and hadn’t been such a bore, maybe pro surfing would have survived.
just as good as JJF and Dane at Haleiwa
Would be fucking awesome if he smells blood and goes full on competitive machine, buzzer beaters, post heat presser shadethrowing, not knowing what to do with all those hard earned yeti coolers etc etc
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
But how unlikely is this.
How the fuck is this still interesting to Kelly?
tax deductions?
Why do all major league sports fail to embrace the genius of the mid season cut; MLB, NBA, PGA, NHL F1, cut all sub .500 teams and individuals at mid season. Second half comebacks are impossible! WSL is run by clowns.
Except that the major sports do.
NBA playoffs have now become such an overwrought and drawn out affair that a good half the league now qualifies for the playoffs. Same with the NHL.
The MLB is the only league where getting into the playoffs is actually difficult.
I’m any event, the WSL could just adopt more of a playoffs approach by doing the cut before the last event, just taking the top 16 men and top 8 women, seeding them according to their points accrued during the season, and just running a single elimination bracket over a 2+ day event.
sporting events are hard to find between commercials…
All they need to do is permanently cut 4 surfers from the men’s seeding and two surfers from the women’s. That simple change eliminates round 1 and 2, and cuts two days of pointless competition from the event, allowing more chance of it being held in the best conditions.
You have a top 30 in the men and top 15 in the women and the sponsors are happy because they still get 2 wildcards in the men and 1 in the women. It’s such a fucking no brainer I don’t know why they don’t do it, unless the sponsors actually want more competition even if it’s in shit surf so they get more press coverage?
usually pushed…
Kelly needs to ride a more standard board and put it on rail. Thats his strength out side of barrels. Feel hes almost to scared to do his best surfing incase it comes up short….so he rides skitish little boards that make it look like hes always close to falling off.
Would be good to see him just go surf properly for his last year on tour.
Handicaps himself for a decade now.
Also those awful potato chip thin late ’90’s boards.
He’s just bored of riding those boards. I get it, I’ve gone though that phase and I’ve only got a 3 turns up my sleeve.
You and hippy have nailed it. He is riding the wrong boards. Has been for years. I mean he’s still radical but he over pushes all his turns. Its like he’s gone full gary elkerton when he stopped being kong and became an ugly contest surfer.
Yup- Chrome Dome always insists on paddling out on some bullshit experimental 14-fin-carbon-fiber FireWire. Which he then uses to mostly just Shark the lineup while Felipe/Italo/brazzos take him to ComboLand within the first 8min doing air reverses and rodeo flips. Then it’s off to the elimination round he goes.
And like someone else posted- what the fuck does he even bother doing this for? He could easily and very permanently fuck off to wherever he wants to surf perfect waves and play golf at only the best courses. And he could still poke his head up for a Wildcard or two at Pipe or Tahiti- if swell outlook is suitable for his Royal Baldness, ofc. But instead he’s grinding out elimination rounds in cold and dreary Portugal, or the always exciting 1-2ft dribblers at beautiful Saqaurema.
Slater missing from the CT is the equivalent of the missing risk manager in SVB.
Is there a way to bailout the WSL?