Help is on the way.
Erik Logan, former chief executive of the World Surf League, was fired in the rudest way almost three weeks ago. Since then, the Championship Tour has traveled to South Africa, Chief of Sport Jessi Miley-Dyer has reignited her love affair with swimming pools, Kelly Slater has lost another heat but Erik Logan, himself, has vanished completely.
The overactive social media user has silenced his channels, refused to respond to messages, is no longer asking young men to “take your shirt off” because he is wearing their skin. He has appeared on no red carpets alongside the effervescent Jessi Miley-Dyer, given no speeches about vectors and synergies, is just… gone.
The World Surf League, for its part, is pretending the former Oprah Winfrey Network boss never even existed.
My initial mirth at his dismissal soon turned to sorrow but now hovers in deep, deep worry.
While collaborationist surf media is moving on without care, praising the ELo years by spackling the Wall of Positive Noise, I am not able to rest. Sleeplessness haunts my nights. A spectre of Logan wearing latex, duct taped to a wall, ball gag in mouth. A shadow of Logan wearing leather, strapped to a table, ball gag in mouth. The owner of the World Surf League, Dirk Ziff is, as you know, a billionaire and… well, I’ll just leave it at that.
Stab is not going to help. We must.
I must.
Logan was last seen in Brazil, getting uncomfortably close to his employees and praising a bright future while the WSL ran the Vivo Rio Pro in waist high slop. Thus, I must start in Brazil and find him or at least find rumors of where he might have gone.
I have booked last minute passage to Sao Paulo. Did you know the most populous city in the Americas has a motto declaring, “I am not led, I lead”? It’s true and I feel Ziff might either be sending a message to the surf fans he so loathes or Logan will have beaten it out of Rio in order to enjoy Adriano de Souza’s home, knowing that it has been essentially erased from surf history thanks to the aforementioned Slater.
I leave first thing tomorrow morning. Forgive the 24 hours of silence. No wonder Kelly Slater refuses to travel to the land of Progress and Order.
It’ll be my first time down under and am certainly looking forward to the much-ballyhooed “passion” but will also not let racist dog whistles derail my mission.
Hold on, Erik Logan. I’m coming for you.
It takes forever.
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THIS is wrong at so many levels, yet so right!
Hannibal Lector picked him up off the streets and let’s just say…aged fine wine…and a heart that didn’t taste anything like a lion…
If only BG created a pic of this plausible scenario…
Sorry my reading comprehension is weak today. Did you mean just the tip? Did Elo use just the tip?
She’s like a real life Debbie Downer. Wah wah wahhh…
fired drinking too much at almost every event and spending one too many times doing innapropriate shit with employees and others. was warned and finally had to be fired.
And then that incident in Brazil behind the bleachers with Elo doing those disgusting acts with Chris Coté just sealed the deal. Can’t believe they let him get away with that so long after catching him doing those things so many times before.
Thank you, my wife would not answer that question and returned to something she considered interesting.
“The rudest way”. That got me good
Chas: “Now how can I make my annual vacation tax deductible……?”
Kevin Spacey is innocent!
to all dim dudes. “we’re managing a coastline here & there. donate!”
student of the game
And JMD in a pink tutu as tinkerbell
Tick tock
Judges are playing Surfival league i reckon.
or was Elo dressed up all Transgender like and made a poass at JMD ?
AGAIN, if only BG created a pic of this plausible scenario…
I agree, just grasping at straws here. Con actually wobbles off a couple of the early turns – just bizarre.
Ok , so Elo is in a bunker with his lawyers , trying to work out how to minimize the damage to his impeccable reputation , as his closet behavior has now buried him to wall of lonely isolation called now, “the ELO wall of positive spin?”
waxing & waning. tides are consistent. all else is not.
Some might speculate Elo ran afoul of the moral turpitude clause in his contract, but not me as he seems so gentle, so all American, so Okie likeable and of course he has a mighty purdy mouth!
Let the banjos play boys!
Welcome to Saquarema … now go to hell.
p.s. godspeed on your noble quest.
Go the Chasolo !
Be fun to track down the Security Company that gave ye auld heave-Ho to Elo – to find out who gave the order. Wooz or direct from the Amship?
Like Tom Hanks in Castaway Elo will be found alone in the jungle wearing a t-shirt of a mans chest tattoo talking to his only possession of a past life, a JS Forget Me Not, reminiscing of times of activations, vectors and synergies