"Maybe they could use a nice picture from him in hospital."

World Surf League accused of “passive aggressively trolling Ethan Ewing” as surf fans mutiny over controversial Finals Day format

“So is Ethan Ewing going to compete as a bodyboarder or how is he supposed to surf with a broken back?”

In a couple of weeks, the top five rated men and women will compete at Lower Trestles in a one-day grand final that’ll decide the world champions.

At least that was the theory until the world number two-rated surfer Ethan Ewing broke his back at Teahupoo. The twenty-four-year-old Australian’s accident was met with aquarium-like silence by the drama-adverse World Surf League, who merely mentioned he’d been scratched from the upcoming Tahitian Pro and replaced by a local surfer. 

Eventually, the WSL allowed that if Ewing cannot compete the men’s div would be reduced to four with the winner of the first heat, fourth and fifth-rated Joao Chianca and Jack Robinson, gifted a bye into the penultimate heat against world number two Griffin Colapinto. Win that and y’into the final against tiny-wave tyro and reigning world champ Pip Toledo. 

Despite our sources telling us Ewing is “not in good shape” and may have to wait three months for an operation, followed by six months out of the water, the WSL continues to presume Ewing will compete in the event, running graphics that include Ewing.

And, oowee, it’s driving the WSL’s own fans nuts. 

This is starting to feel like you’re just passive aggressively trolling Ethan

there is a WSL obscenity all over the post putting this up.

maybe they could use a nice picture from him in hospital.

Wtf Ethan Ewing won’t recover in time everybody knows you better update the rule book and tell us if Medina replaces him or if it’s gonna be a 4 men’s final, you act so silly sometimes 

So is EE going to compete as a bodyboarder or how is he supposed to surf with a broken back?

The lack of transparency on Ethan’s condition and his replacement is beyond ridiculous. Do we need to wait until “make or break” covers it? Why not release a statement about his possible replacement in the event he can not recover on time? It isn’t difficult. Medina should take the number 5 spot and every other surfer should move one spot closer to Filipe “cavern dodger” Toledo

Not putting the next in the rankings if Ethan Ewing can’t run due to injury is a big mess to the surfers and the public!!! Haven’t been looking forward to watching this tour joke in a while…

Why wouldn’t you replace Ethan with Medina? I don’t even like him but it’s stupid to run it this way. I was so excited that things would get better when Logan got the axe. It’s just more of the same. Maybe Eric Logan just got all the blame but was never the problem. Put the best surfers in the best waves. @redbull please start the purple blob tour.

The @wsl and @ethan_ewing are both keeping conspicuously silent about what’s going on. How about an update on his back injury? How serious was the injury? No one is saying anything.

How hard is it to say:

1. Due to the wipeout in Tahiti, @ethan_ewing will not compete for the world title at Trestles. Or 2. Medical professionals are watching @ethan_ewing closely, the severity of the injury is not fully known at this time and he might still be able to compete. Or 3. @ethan_ewing has withdrawn due to injury, and the #3 spot will go to @joaochumbinho, #4 @jackrobinson72 and #5 the next highest ranked surfer, @gabrielmedina. Then they can put all this suspicious drama and politics to rest.

that’s exactly what a statement of the WSL should look like!

And they know exactly that Ethan won’t be able to compete…and he shouldn’t! He shouldn’t be under pressure, he needs to focus on the healing process.

And it’s ridiculous if they don’t replace Ethan. They do it all the time when a surfer is injured. (And I think it’d be a good idea to add Ethan’s throwaway points to his end result.)

@wsl behavior is a shame!

And on, and on. When they’re not tearing hell out of the WSL on Ewing it’s the Finals Day format although, here, I differ from majority opinion. It’s the only contest of the year that has any meaningful drama throughout the course of the event.

As much as a bitch needs dick sometimes she needs a director more.

And Finals Day was Logan’s crowning glory. 


Lone Ranger who has appropriated @philiptoledo Instagram account shreds Brazilian superstar ahead of Finals Day


We live in the future, all of us, where electric FedEx trucks sing songs while double parking, the world’s richest man Jeff Bezos has married an AI bot and sitting world surfing champion Filipe Toledo, who refuses to paddle into big lefts, has his Instagram account run by a troll.


Aliens also, apparently, exist, but back to Filipe Toledo. The Brazilian flyboy has lived in the United States of America, near Lower Trestles, for some time now thereby rending his name Philip Toledo. Wonderful and blended with the only trouble arising from the fact that he doesn’t actually own the name “Philip Toledo” on Instagram though somebody does do who enjoys commenting about fear and big waves on other posts.

A sampling.

Very funny and true, though I’m trying to get real inside information from Toledo himself on why he don’t like to go big and left thanks to our Voice Of No Reason’s pushing.

Light candles.

In the meantime, and with the Teahupo’o Olympics coming up, do you think Philip is ready to actually face his fear legitimately?

Or will a “Kelly-Slater-needing-to-go-to-Brazil” type injury beset him?

On that note, Slater is the best professional surfer to ever live. Why can’t he just admit he hates progress and order?

Doubling down, why can’t Filipe just say, “It’s true. I’m scared. Have you seen that reef up close?”

Are you there, Julian Assange?

It’s me Chas.

Assange and pal.
Assange and pal.

Greatest surfer ever Kelly Slater joins Roger Waters, M.I.A. in narrating new documentary on WikiLeak founder Julian Assange

"He (Assange) put out information people didn't want being put out but it was all truthful and I don't know how you fault a guy for putting out the truth."

There’s good news and then there’s great news and today’s announcement, that the 11x world surf champion Kelly Slater will be narrating parts of new Julian Assange documentary THE TRUST FALL, is absolutely fabulous news. News worth mixing a fussy French 75 and hoisting it to the sky whilst saying “huzzah!”

Per the press release:

We are stoked to announce that 11 time world champion surfer Kelly Slater will be doing some narration for The TRUST FALL: Julian Assange – Documentary!

There are very few celebrities who have brave enough to speak out on Julian’s behalf, such is the strong adherence to the establishment amongst A-Listers. No-one wants to be black-listed or excluded, so conformity is the modus operandi of the vast majority of high profile people.

Slater is one of the few celebrities who has been willing to voice his support for Julian, as revealed in an instagram video in March this year where Slater stated:

“He (Assange) put out information people didn’t want being put out but it was all truthful and I don’t know how you fault a guy for putting out the truth”.

Slater will join our celebrity narrating team along with legendary rockers Roger Waters and U.K. rapper M.I.A. plus Aussie voice-over artist Jonathan Oldham.

Having a professional surfer sportsperson may seem like a strange choice for a political film, however please bear in mind that this film aims to educate a very wide audience about the important issues surrounding the Assange predicament, and one of the best ways to reach a wider audience is through role models and people with a large following and fan base who might otherwise never take the time to watch a political film. So this is a strategic move and somewhat of a marketing move to have the involvement of people from a variety of walks of life.

The project is now nearing completion, however there are some crucial steps remaining before we can do the worldwide cinema release include making the all-important final trailer, additional colour and sound grading, making a website, translating the film into many different languages, having the film classified, and entering the film into festivals in order to obtain distributers to help with the theatrical release.




As a surf journalist, I was always surprised that the public, celebrities included, hated on Assange which, I suppose, means I stand with Slater.

Who knew?

You can support the film here.

Tudor (pictured) victorious. Photo: WSL
Tudor (pictured) victorious. Photo: WSL

Surf legend Joel Tudor goes nuclear in economics debate, shreds opponent with brutal but antiquated slur

"You just confirmed you’re are retarded."

The three-time longboard champion, and father of its modern old-school iteration, is nothing if not prolific. Just yesterday saw him dividing the internet after a cryptic post written in Spanish denied the catastrophic effects of climate change. And today sees him embroiled in a wild economics debate, going nuclear on opponents with antiquated slurs.

The whole business got underway on a post from the Instagram comedy account Toby Honk wherein he poked fun of the high cost of surfboard pricing. Tudor swung in with “Airbrush was 50$ …..thanks to bidenflation it’s now about 150….ohh what difference 4 yrs make,” to get the debate started which began slowly at first, all agreeing with the elder statesman’s stance.

#JoelTudorsAmerica etc.

Until Shea Somma, a shaper from California’s central coast, suggested, “Maybe it shouldn’t have stayed the same price for decades.”

Tudor wasted no time going to his arsenal, finding a very powerful but outlawed word and dropping it from altitude, declaring, “You may be retarded! Price of materials being stable benefits the builder and keeps cost low for customer …basic win for everyone involved!”


Somma took the explosion and responded, “My point wasn’t that materials cost going up is a good thing, my point was that price remaining artificially low over the course of multiple decades is a bad thing.”

Tudor, seemingly satisfied with the first use, came back with, “you just confirmed you’re are retarded.”

Somma, dazed, asked, “So prices and wages remaining the same for glassers while cost of living steadily rises… is a good thing? I’m pretty slow here as you’ve pointed out so please explain…”

But Tudor was finished.

Others engaged, however, and the conversation is both interesting and informative, as it relates to the nuances of the surfboard industry.

Very inside baseball, as it were.

But, in any case, do you have opinions on Bidenomics? Did you like when he went to Maui and made some yucks with a dog wearing shoes?


Triple world surfing champion divides internet after cryptic post written in Spanish denies catastrophic effects of climate change

“Where can I sign up to learn more about meteorology from professional surfers?”

As we all know, or should, the world is rifling to a bitter end. Soon, the water will be at our necks, the sun will boil our blood, and all because we didn’t have the courage and foresight to make the necessary adjustments to our carbon dioxide-spewing lifestyles.

This is fact, dogma, whatever you want to call it. Question it at your peril and so on.

The ultra-purist long boarder Joel “Tinkerbell” Tudor, who became the sport’s oldest-ever world champion, winning his third log crown aged forty-five two years ago, thinks otherwise, it appears.

In a post mocking the idea that Hurricane Hilary might be the logical result of climate change, Tudor posted satellite photos of the same hurricane with the caption, “Hurricane heading towards CA…it’s climate change!!!” on one and “Hurricane heading towards Mexico… it’s summertime” on the other.

The inference being, hurricanes swing by in summer. Ain’t nothing to get lit up about.

His caption Mucho Mierda, an old Spanish expression often used to wish actors luck prior to a show, translates simply as “Load of shit.” And, oowee, it has driven progressives mad.


The third tropical storm to hit California in recorded history is very normal indeed. Where can I sign up to learn more about meteorology from professional surfers?

(Joel replied, “hhhhhhhahahaha this weirdo has been commenting back novels for 24 hrs ….can you say obsessed fan boy upset at a phone much hahahahhh.”)

Hurricanes are tied to water temperature, so yes water temperature is warmer further south. Water temps are historically colder further north…. So a hurricane that hits further north is indicative of abnormally warm water in the north and a changing climate. Even still the changes are gradual, but the expression becomes more and more extreme like a pendulum picking up speed.

Imagine swallowing the Fossil Fuel industry propaganda and confusing it for being a ‘free thinker’

Sometimes he’s right, sometimes he’s the biggest Barney on the Internet

Ok, so there’s no such thing as climate change, Mr. Tudor? Love your surfing and everything you have done for the sport, but this post sucks…

So regardless of this being the 1st time NHC has issued a Tropical Storm Watch for this region, do you think Climate Change is a hoax

nice thing to post after un precedented tragedies fueled by droughts, hurricanes, and poor land management in Maui. Not sure why surfers like to latch onto bad propaganda while the scientific community and all of our global meteorology data is in agreement. Storm severity, frequency, record setting temperature of land and ocean, increasing scopes of natural disasters. That’s climate change. The planet will be fine, our infrastructure, food sources, and impoverished communities will suffer. When did surfers become so brainwashed to believe conspiracy theories

And, ominously,

Are you a climate change denier?

Denier! A blasphemer!

Plenty on his side, howevs, reflecting, I think, the climate change fatigue among average people a little tired of being fed apocalyptic scenarios.

While all the Climatards jump all over this thread with all their “facts” the forecast has been downgraded to one day of rain 1-3 inches and 20mph winds as expected 😂 you’ll get us next time climate change.

These comments are classic… everyone with a sane brain knows it won’t be near hurricane force when it come remotely close to us in SoCal. No matter what the Climate bafoons think… why? Because it will hit cold water or land first. Which we have both also why we don’t have hurricanes. Every single model shows this….. but but but muh Carbon…. Enjoy the rainy day

Personally, I find the hoo-ha exhilarating and, given we’re all doomed anyway, I hope to be here, dressed in a maraschino-red suit with silk lapels, a black shirt and a bow tie, ready to clap the apocalypse on the back as we all burn to hell, the liquid fire eating me alive.


Are there smart people out there ie anyone not coloured by political allegiances, who can give me their thoughts on the matter?


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