Jimmy Slade, is that you?
The world’s greatest surfer, Kelly Slater, is far past his competitive prime. Oh, what he has achieved over the course of a 45-year professional career, winning 11 championships, an Eddie, 8 Pipe Masters etc. will likely never be eclipsed though, like many athletes, he has hung on too long and as a still very handsome 56-year-old will never win another heat.
What, then, should he do?
Rumors floated that he was angling to be coach of the U.S. Olympic surf team over certain objections. But imagine him bobbing in that channel boat, watching, Billy Stairmand et. al. thread Teahupo’o, a wave he himself has conquered 5 times. Torture. It would be a pure torture more excruciating than the Dune pain box or getting stung on the testicles by a scorpion.
What, then, else?
Slater watchers know that he needs the spotlight and so a quiet fade into obscurity is not in the cards. Likewise, entering the World Surf League booth would be a hefty step down, singing and dancing for 15,000 fans. Moving full time to his new Abu Dhabi facility might seem fun for a minute, and he would certainly be feted, but as someone who has spent enough time in the United Arab Emirates, the thrill quickly wears off.
Enter Fox.
The right-leaning television network has just announced that it is bringing a reboot of the 90s hit Baywatch back to the small screen.
Fox and Fremantle have tapped Lara Olsen (“Spinning Out”) to serve as showrunner for the new “Baywatch,” which was originally created by Michael Berk, Douglas Schwartz and Gregory J. Bonann. Starring David Hasselhoff, “Baywatch” originally ran from 1989 to 1999 and then was retooled as “Baywatch: Hawaii” from 1999 to 2001.
Olsen, Berk, Bonann and Schwartz will serve as exec producers on the one-hour drama, which comes from both Fremantle and Fox Entertainment. Here’s the new logline: “Daring ocean rescues, pristine beaches, and iconic red bathing suits are back, along with a whole new generation of Baywatch lifeguards, who navigate complicated, messy personal lives in this action-packed reboot that demonstrates there’s the family you’re born into and the family you find.”
Besides Hasselhoff, the show’s cast over the years included Pamela Anderson, Yasmine Bleeth, Alexandra Paul, Erika Eleniak, Nicole Eggert, Parker Stevenson and many others. Hasselhoff also starred in a spinoff series, the private eye drama “Baywatch Nights,” which aired from 1995 to 1997. “Baywatch” was a syndication sensation, airing in more than 145 countries at one point, more than any other TV show. The series’ PR company even made up a stat, calling it the “No. 1 series in the world,” which was then reprinted as fact in publications.
Left off the list of stars the show broke, one Kelly Slater, who thrilled audiences with his turn as Jimmy Slade. Handsome, brooding, sensitive and sexy, Slater was perfect in the role and a reimagining of that character at 58 would be the perfect bookend to a phenomenal career.
So good it feels destined.
Should we start an online petition demanding Slater’s casting?
Those usually work really good.
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How do you write an article and misstate the subject’s well-known age by 4-6 years, twice? Great, um, journalism?
If only he’d died at 27 like all the stars seem to do.. ,we’d have nothing to spaz on about, hell we’d like him. Remember him
Maybe…
Maybe next year?
right wing news meets the wall of positive toxicity…
typed Kelly Slater Baywatch character on go duck…and what’s the Number 1 link? “All Eyes On Kelly” @Beachgrit. Start The Petition!
We can all agree he’s close to 60.
….and what of Beach Grits very own Michael Newman?
squeezing into the faded red budgy smugglers of old, or going with the new short cut boardies?
R. Kelly in a Hasselhoff toupee would be must see tv.
I honestly thought all eyes would be on supertubos and how onshore it may be?
‘twas pumping today apparently ! Not sure about the waiting period though
“the forecast shows promise…” Surflineman
& In surf news a guy drowned a gland
More like teasing the weasel.
It’s doubtful the surfer Jimmy Slade would’ve reached the heights on the pro surf tour that the actor Kelly Slater did.
After dropping out through injury and inevitable hair-loss disappointment, he would’ve skulked back home and carried on with van life, supporting the drug and booze habits he picked up (while hanging out with Kong and Pottz et al) by selling dream-catchers made from beach carpark trash.
Or he would’ve become a frustrated real estate salesman who still trys to snag every wave off the children and elderly at his local…
Stop projecting Wes
or holding out for the Sheik’s daughter? Dubai…Prince of the chlorinated pool bestowed upon him by the King of the indoor ski thingy…
Kelly is 56 not 58.
52! but who’s counting! his hip is a newborn!
Surely the weight of his ego and 52 year old body cant be supported by a newborns hip
would need an exoskeleton for that heavy load
And a big dose of cunty. Champ got plenty of that.
Kelly could play an old grumpy lifeguard that is well past his prime and wont give up his tower to the younger up and comng lifeguard. While on duty this older grumpy lifeguard is often seen purusing and engaging in Instagram tiffs.
So, us?
Bangin Pam in her prime > 11 World Titles
definitely had more competition for the former
Going in post Tommy would give you PTSD
And Hep B. Timing is everything. Kelly makes his own luck
Hep C
she left KS alone at the alter. FLA man.
PTSTD
P STD
If you haven’t read it, I recommend the Motley Crue biopic “the dirt”. The best bit is when Tommy Lee dates Pam for the first time and says “she had been dating some surfer called Kelly Slater”.
the opening scene is a real squirter…
What about when they are snorting ants with Ozzy.
Native Californians of Spanish or
Mexican descent (Californios)
accumulate great wealth, largely
through cattle ranching, and build
large adobe residences
Pio Pico, the last Mexican Governor
of California, awards generous
land grants containing thousands of
acres, 19 of which are located in
Ventura County
Battles between troops loyal to
Mexico and opposing Californio
rebels prompt the ouster of
governors from the province of Alta
California
Rancho Ex-Mission San
Buenaventura, which contains
present-day downtown Ventura, is
granted to Jose Arnaz
Not sure where you are going with this, but if Rob Machado is to be believed, his abuelo owned a huge ranch in what is now LA.
save the mission failed. surf in front is OK…my parcel has shrunk from 350 to 1/3 acres…no worrries!
canoes and such
a lil’ cali history…pre-Baywatch. when life was black&white. what evolved couldn’t have happened without some tussles. it wasn’t always clean waves and blonds with silicone. the eventual KS &PA coupling took centuries of drama and shouldn’t be confused with other realtitties…
<iframe width=”1280″ height=”773″ src=”https://www.youtube.com/emb…” title=”How Many More Times (Remaster)” frameborder=”0″ allow=”accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share” allowfullscreen=””></iframe>
stage frieght…https://youtu.be/Q7kA5qDOUHE?si=gIc…
Do you think Kelly keeps a lock of his hair from those heady days in a shoebox like a new mother would with her child’s hair?