Chants of "we want Yago!" filling the humid air.
The final final final Olympic qualifying opportunity is now, officially, in the rearview (I think) with every ticket to Teahupo’o now thoroughly punched (maybe). Surf fans were thrilled, yesterday, as Gabriel Medina righted his competitive ship and stormed though all comers at the World Surfing Games thereby gifting his nation, Brazil, a bonus third slot that he will occupy.
Assuming that Joao Chianca is healthy, the land of order and progress has a legitimate shot to take gold and silver and the place of broken skulls, though a historic medal sweep is certainly off the table with Filipe Toledo also on the team.
While, in most cases, it would seem fortuitous to have a two-time world champion in the fold, Toledo presents a unique case what with abject terror seizing his heart, rendering him unable to even paddle, much less surf, the “Cave of Skulls.”
Now, the world’s undisputed small wave king has angrily defended his timidity, openly declaring that he owes nothing to no one, before taking the year off citing “mental health.” Surf fans, with generally muddled minds, have listed to the li’l lion’s meows and accepted the various excuses proffered, even praising his pre-Olympic vacation as “stigma busting.”
The question, though, is will Brazil’s “passionate” fanbase be as understanding?
Imagine that the ocean cooperates come July 27 – August 4 (the Olympic surf window). Imagine postcard perfect Teahupo’o, those ultramarine swells bending into giant tacos as they touch the reef. Imagine the eyes of the world watching John John Florence, Jack Robinson, Leonardo Fioravanti otherwise known as the United States, Australia and Italy, being taught a sharp lesson by the aforementioned Medina and Chianca, or Brazil. Imagine the civil pride, green and gold uber alles, but then frustration as Toledo bows out China’s Siqi Yang in the first round knowing that it could have been Yago Dora there instead, bronze medal dangling around his bronze neck.
Toledo, no doubt, beginning to feel the pressure to vacate. Will he stare down an entire sport mad nation, mustering vast resources of will, or will he wilt as is his wont?
More as the story develops.
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Everyone is pushing for Yago but Miggie won chopes in 2022 in pretty good conditions.
Any word as to if T*led* picked up a Wavestorm sponsor.
Surely a perfect fit
Pips gonna need a lot of Hinano’s for all the food poisoning Chopes dishes.
The only way he’s not going is if he gets injured or “fails to uphold the olympic spirtit” whick is code for doesnt fail a drug test and doesnt get a swastika tattooed on his forehead.
He might go and chicken out again but he’ll definitely go. I mean it’s the fn olympics.
https://youtu.be/-h-crmBPHb…
Torpedo will chicken out and hand his gifted spot over to someone with GONADS
I say gifted spot bcos he knows and we ALL know he was NEVER going to be a World Champion. Unless someone changed the rules and that’s what happened. Unfortunately the World Championship trophy has been defaced in the process, by twice having an imposter’s name on it.
Except that in 2023 he’d have already won the title on the old rules.
It might be small and pipable Chopes but if it gets over 6 foot I’d wager he’ll fold like a cheap tent
6 foot your dreaming, back up big fella. Try 4 foot at CHOPES
Pip “hey sharpeye, how’s my chopes quiver going bra?”
Marco “bro, u didn’t ride your Hawaiian boards, just take them..”
One week window in the Olympics. Chances are it’ll be tiny and shit. Toledo for the gold.
…yeah, why have only a week? sounds silly doesn’t it.
Siqi would go.
Look at that thing on the right of Felipe, then try and eat breakfast
too late, she already stole your breakfast
LOL
identifies as a priority buoy
who doesn’t love a great revenge story
https://youtu.be/uw66FA6OTq…
Rooting for pip to stay in the draw and that he sends it. Not holding me breath tho
This Time!
That should be launched right to the top of the most ridiculous surf related comments ever made on BG.
I’m thinking Brazil should keep Felipe on the team because they might have a backup venue called the “Beach of Small Penises. “
So hard to find parking there. The Beach of Small Penises lot is always full with big lifted trucks and short dudes with bad tattoos.
Heard from the boys who surf the waves are usually pumping and obviously they were ripping
Sssshhh, please don’t tell everyone about my secret spot