Gabriel Medina (pictured) Olympic-bound?
Gabriel Medina (pictured) Olympic-bound?

Gabriel Medina wins World Surfing Games thereby punching bonus Olympic ticket for Brazil!

But who will Teahupo'o?

The dark night is back(ish). Minutes ago, former World Surf League champion and dogged competitor Gabriel Medina took out Morocco’s Ramzi Boukhaim and France’s Kauli Vaast plus Joan Duru to win the International Surfing Association’s World Surfing Games. The victory hands Brazil a third Olympic slot, on the men’s side, giving the proud nation of order and progress a legitimate shot at victory in Teahupo’o.

Before the World Surfing Games, held in the U.S. protectorate of Puerto Rico, Brazilian surf fans were rubbing their foreheads in dismay. Their two qualifiers, Joao Chianca and Filipe Toledo, limping down the back stretch toward Tahiti with potential problems. Chianca, brave and skilled, has been injured since a horrible accident at Pipeline and is yet to surf in an event this year. Toledo so scared of bigger surf that he pulled out of competition entirely.

The brightest analytical minds are, currently, sorting through the data to see which Brazilian will lay claim to the third Olympic slot as the qualification rules and regulations are more difficult to sort than the formula for cold fusion.

Is it Medina because he won the World Surfing Games?

Is it Italo Ferreira, previous gold medalist, since he is currently the top ranked Brazilian?

Do you know?

Do you have a doctorate in theoretical physics?

Please weigh in below. There’s also job at Surf Ranch for you. Winning at life.

Kelly Slater (pictured) at Surf Ranch.
Kelly Slater (pictured) at Surf Ranch.

World Surf League pivots to “indentured servant” model in job listing for Surf Ranch “Guest Experience Host”

Opportunity knocks.

Dreams about to come true for a lucky job seeker. A path set to radically change. For the World Surf League is officially hiring a Guest Experience Host at its Surf Ranch facility in basically sacred Lemoore, California. Yes, the chosen one will, of course, get to move to “the cow’s bosom,” the center of Kelly Slater’s lugubrious vision, but also work for almost free.

The candidate must be able to tick all of the following boxes before even imagining what that glorious life looks like in the shadow of the Tachi Palace.

Responsibilities include, but not limited to:

-Acting as the main point of contact from the time a group arrives on site until they depart
-Coordinate with Guest Experience team to gather information for upcoming experiences
-Welcome all arriving guests to Surf Ranch
-Champion the collateral creation process including but not limited to guest itineraries, site maps, welcome videos, etc.
-Ensure guest satisfaction and keep open lines of communication with group lead and other group stakeholders
-Relay information to the appropriate team to ensure a smooth-running operation
-Be the liaison for all operational teams on site and relay the proper information to decision makers
-When daily itinerary becomes adjusted ensure communication down to all teams and ensure clear communication to guests on any changes
-Attend operational meetings as necessary
-Coordinate with on-site facilities teams as needed based on guest requests and needs.
-Communicate all maintenance requests and ensure resolution for any guests on site
-Coordinate with team daily to ensure all required guest items are completed and a seamless arrival process can be created
-Work with culinary team to ensure satisfaction for all upcoming groups based on group make-up, requests, and knowledge as the point of contact
-Activate spaces around the property as needed and act as a host to the group while they occupy said space
-Gather and memorialize any data from groups such as requests, preferences, etc.
-Ensure Run of Show is being completed and is accurate. Ensure Run of show is available to all team members
-Build, compile, and track guest profiles to ensure return guest satisfaction
-Act as support when needed for front line Hospitality team
-Perform the welcome presentation daily for all arriving groups
-Perform property tours as required
-Check in all guests to their lodging accommodations
-Ensure the itinerary is distributed to all group members
-Have an intricate knowledge of each day and ensure the flow for the group works
-Have the ability to mediate guest complaints and relay information for resolution
-Accommodate guest needs as requested
-Ensure all pre-arrival information is complete and if it is not gather all information required
-Own the welcome shack and ensure presentation, cleanliness, and all other standards are upheld
-Assist in any projects applicable to further the guest experience
-Perform guest transport to/from property, and around property
-Assist in coordinating flow of guests on and off of the property
-Any other job duties as assigned

Experience and Qualifications

-Previous experience in a resort or hospitality setting
-Outstanding interpersonal and presentation skills for interactions between guests and staff members.
-Demonstrate ability to work with all levels of employees and management, and willingness to give assistance to co-workers
-Prioritize and organize work assignments, have timely follow up and execution.
-Have superb time management skills.
-Maintain complete knowledge of all services/features and hours of operation and be able to communicate them clearly to guests and staff.
-Ability to comply with physical demands as outlined below.
-Knowledge and understanding of Surf Ranch and WSL culture & initiatives
-Technologically sound with Microsoft Office applications.
-Must be able to maintain a flexible work schedule.
-Food Handler card required per CA law.
-Clean drivers record
-California Commercial Driver’s License with a Passenger Endorsement (in good standing and clean driving record)

Personal Attributes

-Exceptional work ethic
-Exceptional attention to detail
-Optimism and energy for the brand and its future
-An open and collaborative nature
-Strong team player

Working Conditions / Physical requirements (if applicable)

-The employee is regularly required to talk and hear. This position is very active and requires standing, walking, bending, kneeling, stooping and crouching.
-This position is very active and requires standing, walking, bending, kneeling, stooping, crouching, crawling, and climbing all day.
-Must be physically able to wipe down surfaces, reach, twist, bend and be able to pick up debris from floor or items from storage spaces.
-Lift/carry 25 lbs (frequently) and 50 lbs (occasionally)
-May be exposed to extreme temperatures, dust, dampness, height, and moving machinery.

And will earn between $17 and $20 U.S. dollars per hour.

It is fantastic that the World Surf League is already learning about business and staffing from its new friends in the United Arab Emirates, where the other Surf Ranch is. Indentured servitude for the win.

Apply here.

Chris Cote reports from Olympic qualifier as Yago Dora and Gabriel Medina fight for coveted Teahupoo ticket!

"The hottest show on earth!"

Today we find Chris Cote, BeachGrit’s man on the sand at the Olympic qualifier in Puerto Rico, reporting on the penultimate day of competition for his new YouTube show Toxic Positivity.

The most important matter is whether or not Brazil, already hamstrung in their quest for Olympic surfing gold with one surfer injured physically, the other famously terrified of the site of the Games, can squeeze one more surfer into the mix.

The coveted extra ticket to Teahupoo will go to the country that finishes atop the team leaderboard at the conclusion of competition tomorrow. Brazil, whose team at the Qualifier includes the recently retired Filipe Toledo, as well as Gabriel Medina and Yago Dora, leads with France a not-too-distant second.

The question Chris Cote asks, therefore, if Brazil wins will the third male surfer be Yago Dora or will it be Gabriel Medina?

The answer will surprise.

“I’m sure you’ve been watching, I’m sure you’ve been complaining – this is BeachGrit,” says Chris Cote. “So to all you haters out there, why don’t you celebrate what’s been happening down here in Puerto Rico…Finals Day tomorrow will be the greatest day in surf.”

And come tomoz for Chris Cote’s wrap of the Final Day!

“Symbol of colonial impression” aluminum surf judging tower rises above waters at Teahupo’o

Extremely provocative.

One of the more inspiring bits of this still-young 2024 was the valiant effort of Teahupo’o locals attempting to stop construction of a needless aluminum judging tower proposed to replace the perfectly fine, though quaint, wooden one. Long an iconic part of the “End of the Road,” the “Ndhawu leyi ti yeti coolers ti tshamaka eka yona” or “Place Where Yeti Coolers Dwell,” has witnessed decades of famous performances from the likes of Andy Irons, Nathan Hedge and infamous performances from the likes of Filipe Toledo.

Olympic organizers, however, deemed it too rickety with not enough bidets and, thus, proposed a giant new metal structure. Locals fought, marched, protested against and won a re-imagined tower, still metal, but smaller and without bidets.

The compromise, a lightly less provocative symbol of colonial oppression, is now, officially, poking out of the South Pacific.

Barbara Martins Nio, head of the Tahiti site for the Paris Olympics told the press, “Supervision of the construction site by the teams who have used the tower for 20 years, the opening of the information kiosk, and local consultation on ‘environmental and heritage’ issues have favored a return to calm.”

The brightest linguistic minds from around the world have been gathered and are currently working to decipher what she meant.

“We’ve thrown in the towel,” Cindy Otcenasek, president of Vai Ara o Teahupoo, one of the associations opposed to the work, also told the press, adding they had done “everything that was possible within the limits of the law.”

Where do you stand on the whole situation? Team “Big Aluminum” or “Team Burn It To The Reef?”

World Surf League sheds twelve staffers
Tears as a dozen staff shown door at World Surf League.

Bloodbath at World Surf League as surfing’s brightest creative talents shown door!

Including creative director who created iconic line, “It takes a tour to make a title!”

Five months ago, surf fans woke to the shock news the World Surf League had shuttered its famed Santa Monica headquarters and moved to a shared rental space in El Segundo alongside an animal urgent care facility and a pet cemetery. 

The old joint was originally listed for sale for $14.5 mill although that price has since been shaved by two mill. The selling realtor describes the owner as “motivated” and asks buyers to “submit all offers.” The office is also available for lease at “a special introductory rate.”

After an annus horribilis where the World Surf League mysteriously disappeared its CEO Erik Logan and a world champ was again crowned in weak two-foot waves, bad has apparently hit worse with the sacking of some of the League’s pivotal staff including the creative brain behind the iconic line,“It takes a tour to make a title.” 

(Yeah, I know, redundant after the switch to a Finals  Day. But, still…)

Twelve staffers were iced in the blood-letting, executive assistants, the aforementioned creative director and some creative team members, along with members of the ad op team, as well as the VP of Events. 

No one left empty handed, the WSL generously giving each employee two months severance pay.

Observers suggest the WSL is “likely trimming the fat, could be to make the profit and loss look a little better ahead of a potential buyer looking into the books.” 

As Chas Smith reported around the time of the World Surf League’s move to El Segundo, the likely buyer will be a Saudi awash with petro-dollars and a yearning to own the sport of kings and queens.

Rumors have been boiling for months, now, that the reclusive billionaire and owner of the World Surf League has been shopping his failed asset. Even though former CEO Erik Logan promised growth and “momentum being real” he got fired after telling a boy to “take his shirt off” and those pronouncements were flat out lies.

It is neither growing nor having momentum, exciting ladder sponsorships being the best it can do, and you must imagine that Ziff is chartering the family jet and punching in coordinates as “middle” and “east.”

Wave tanks in Jeddah.

Final’s Day in Haql.

I’ll put all my agurot that Ziff will, anyhow, sell to, if not Saudi then Bahrain sometime next year, using the Olympics as leverage.