"I recommend you go to Nosara in Costa Rica."
Once upon a time, surfers were wildly tribal creatures. Each fell into one very specific camp, high performance Merrick shortboard only gang, say, or below the knee Billabong trunks exclusive crew, and would claw any outsider right in the eyeballs. Alas, times have changed with the swelling ranks of illiterate Covid learners and “good vibes’ enthusiasts. Still, the pockets of rage remain, and let us travel, together, to Central America where one spark has ignited a long-simmering blood feud.
Thunderbomb Surf Camp, which calls Nicaragua home, recently receiving a message asking, “hi, I’m looking for a last minute surf trip for my son. He’s 16. We’re both intermediate surfers but I surf on a SUP. We are looking at the first week of April and can be a little flexible on dates. We would prefer not to have to bring our own boards.”
Jonathan, Thunderbomb’s proprietor, neatly responded, “Hi, I’m sure you are a nice guy but sups and or foils are not allowed here. I recommend you go to Nosara in Costa Rica.”
And, thus, all hell broke loose.
Desert Coyote waded in “always enjoyed following you because it was always positive vibes and good feels. Lately it feels like you might have some ego issues going on centered around 🇨🇷. Everything okay?”
And the pile on began. A sampling:
“It’s wild you don’t understand that you’re not just losing sup surfers, you’re also losing regular surfers and customers who don’t want to stay with a clown. And that’s not even the point, I’m sure you’re doing just fine without us and life’s grand, it’s just crazy for ego to be the thing you’re known for.”
“Damn dude. I don’t SUP but the guy is trying to spend time in the ocean with his son. That’s what life is all about, sharing experiences with each other and spending time together. We are all water people enjoying mother ocean no matter what we ride. Same goes with skateboarding. I treat the scooter kids in the skatepark with respect even though scooting is very uncool in my opinion but the big picture is they’re just trying to have fun and shred! Just hoping my perspective helps a bit. Respect”
“Keep sending them over brotha 🫡 more opportunities for our locals, hotels and the whole community. Should Maybe think of opening another resort under a separate name or something, targeting a more broad market. missing opportunities my friend to help grow ur community!”
“Jonathan / AKA king stirrer of the ‘sup’ers aren’t humans’ pot”
“You are usually funny … but my dad is a lawyer and this is discrimination per se”
“This comes across pretty dickish, FYI.”
And the classic “The ocean belongs to everyone!”
Does it, though?
More to the point, will this trouble lead directly to a reprise of 1980s Central America instability?
More, certainly, as the story develops.
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He should allow SUPs but with a max volume under 40l.
How can you tell if someone grew up poor or rich?
By the way they ask the question, “Do you know who my father is?”
Jonathan’s a great guy and I’m sure this is ‘tongue in cheek’ marketing at work!
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
He could just sit on the beach and Mind Sup the waves.
I remember a time when ski resorts would ban or have restricted areas for snowboards.
Discrimination is discrimination.
We have all the right to indiscriminately or by negligence, kill so many sharks and giant manta rays that we could lose our oxygen maker, the phytoplankton in the sea.
I’m not JFK or MLK so I won’t make a nice speech, and I probably am just too unimportant to get assassinated. My purpose is to inspire hope but in this conversation I’m just going to inspire fear because hearing his entitled SUPing discussion makes me terrified.The host nation, said no. We all should learn when to go, and how to say no, like that. They learned it…
It’s not the Amazon that’s a diverse ecosystem, no net O2 comes out. The more I research, I can surf now, because I’m scared of how this tsunami of 8 billion people, mostly sprang up, in the last 200 years, of 300k, how it’s a jacking rogue peak gonna crash, or is it gonna level off at 11 billion as the UN thinks could be best scenario. I seriously doubt that because it’s never happened that way before, and similar predator prey cycles have. Our civilizations last about 5000 years.
If this is TLDR now, I don’t care, I hope I’m wrong and paranoid and someone can tell me why, or that we stop doing whatever else and help out on this Moon base, I’m not citing anything, ask Google if our CO2 zero, and cheaper energy, is working. Or how many people can earth hold how long till… you’ll see lots of differing opinions but much of it’s what I’m saying.
So once, engineers like I was, ruin the ozone layer in the south of the earth by an air conditioning technology that fed a chain reaction. Oops chaos theory. Side effects. Next we are going to bioengineer methane consuming seaweed, what could possibly go wrong, it seems great. Methane was planet killing gas once and still is 30x worse than CO2, with much less of it.
I think we should find another planet and we haven’t even tried. We should go now. We don’t deserve anything and in nature, conflicts are worked out by natural law. The laws of men and society got us to a level of amazing and powerful technology, at the cost of specialization, but that theoretically would allow us to make starships. In theory that’s not new. But we lost along the way the respect for animals, and for the ocean, so it’s time to go. NASA knows but everyone needs to support them, even if we grew up on xenobotics and are scared, we can’t pull back now, it’s full Star Trek, AI, plasma drives, and gamma resonators, whatever. We have to man the missions, fund them.
We fixed the ozone, but the stuff is in landfills leaking and still gets up there with the methane from all the bioengineered fat cows, farmed fish and other wildly successful food producing for all 8 billion of us entitled fools, little internet bitches. And I admit I am doing that right now but I can’t watch this unfold. Must be the estrogen in the milk making men cowardly? I’m a coward and people are terrified of me because I’m 600 years old can pop up because I’m not obese and I rehabbed for years till I could do one-arm pushups.
So in Bali/Austria, South Africa (ruined by traffic and construction) you get burned in 35 min. In the north you get 2 hours. So there we use nanotech and kill the reef,
We are so righteous we put all the apex predators on the extinct, threatened or endangered list. So what who cares, we are the top, no caged tiger roaring and rattling my bones on the other side of the worl that i can hear. or , orangutan in a box car ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,jail looking at my eyes asking what did I do wrong? I can’t let him out I’m still shaking, bones rattled, from the tiger’s roar. I’m a zero, next to that creature. Even with my cowboy guns, Tiger pure rage is gonna take me unless he discriminates if I had helped him out once.
Knowing I am a bule, in Bali and I get discrimination and violence everywhere I go, and I go alone and deal with it because they killed a dog for just being a dog. I saved him, and later that boy saved my life and they still do that for me. The animals.
Now they locals don’t discriminate on me or any dogs so much, because, they know I’m seriously not ok with that by looking at my dead soul.
But we maybe already did it…the earth is our mother and we the well motherfuckers… putting fans on it. I’m not sure if the ocean can recover. From runoff and bioshock.
Nature has a way to gimp the apex, that’s too successful. With sharks, they alone went extinct nearly, once.. it’s a big mystery but I think I know why because I find out by digging deeper. They had a special geometric shape on the skin scales, made them have longer range with less effort. That trait was recessive too, and they got lazy and it wasn’t required and the trait got lost. Sharks came back from the brink, they don’t reproduce as fast as fish. Without the special shapes they aren’t victims of their own success. After 420 million years, they survived even the asteroid and the methane, the “great dying” period, but we humans, they ain’t gonna survive us unless we do something very risky and either way, we are leaving or starving and collapsing.. If a just a matter of time that the choice needs to be made and fully committed to. Chaos theory predicts cyclic chaos and like the weather it’s not accurate but rogue waves break the same and they happen.
So my point is if we don’t leave the earth in spaceships we build on the moon, we go extinct or gimped, we aren’t nothing versus a tiger or elephant or any animal, without our amazing high tech that’s just blowing up and not a year too soon. If we was a war or asteroid or some chain reaction from loss of biodiversity, we will get bifurcated, scattered, likely not extinct, but we will forget all our technology and we probably need 5000 years to try again.
That means no internet not technology, and I don’t have to do research and not surf. And if you are old, 600 you pop up by doing one-handed pushups. Train like a marine, and your weight should be on the border of underweight because we are greedy and have gone soft.
Changes made:
runoff”.
53. Changed “bioshock” to
Objection: Relevance
Thunderous Bomb on that one dog! Buenos Suerte guey!
Just let E Lo book a trip already
okay so let me get the story straight.
guy from Boston, Mass (Jonathan Dickface) moves to Nica, buys CAS land, builds a surf camp and discriminates against people that he deems not worthy…..because he’s a “real” surfer.
If I were dad, i’d pack up the biggest baddest SUP you’ve ever seen, head to Nica, and everyday, be at Thunderfuck, follow them to their chosen break and drop in on every single “camper” on every wave, and if they are riding a wave and I’m on the inside, I’d bail my board in front of them….but then again, I’m a bit of vengeful cunt.
And you obviously SUP.
HA! I have never sup’ed in my life…well except one time when I took my dog out….and when we used to teach surfing we would paddle out using canoe paddles, before SUPing was SUPing.
I don’t like SUP’s but everyone has their right to do what they want….and if you want to SUP, then SUP, just don’t be a hog and don’t burn me.
Hey while you’re here. if hippy requests my email contact, can you send it to him? Cheers.
Thunderfuck is a way better name, sign me up
it’s name of a strain of pot in Alaska.
I like pot!
Do you need some crackers with that salt? Maybe a frozen marg?
nah, I just throw it over my shoulder for luck.
I just always get a kick out of expats that move to foreign lands and become the self appointed arbiter(s) of morality….and we all know how immoral those SUPeople are.
Kick his ass seabass!
I think he’s just messing around and shouldn’t take it too serious. It’s funny that ppl are getting so worked up over it. Just go to chancletas if your need to SUP there so bad.
I’m just having fun being the contrarian.
personally, I couldn’t give a rats ass about SUP’s or expat surf camp owners.
Touché … that’s what the internets for! 🤙🏻
I will say that everyone else involved with that camp is a local, and they are stoked and great ppl. Braj out
What do you do if you are broke and fat with a coke habit? Go to Nica, follow others to the surf spots, then open a surf camp for clowns. Sit at the top of the peak on a mini mal. Take your groups and shit all over the beaches after you drive all over the turtle nests. Crack pre surf with dudes who really like hanging with younger dudes.
I back it 100%. Dad’s spending time with kids: always cool. But….the Boom is actually a really bad wave for Sup’s so he’s doing you a favor and being truthful rather than taking your money and saying “come on down it’s great for supping!” Jonathan is honest and the world needs more of this. Not everyone gets a trophy.
I see many SUPers at Pipe….guys that would absolutely blow you away when to comes to surfing skills.
does he reject beginners. intermediates, Felipe Toledo?
It’s his camp and he’ll cry if he wants to, cry if he wants to
Bono….honest ffs
Leave the dick draggers at home to bahahahha!
He successfully filtered out the VALs, great business plan.
I’ve stayed with him before, best trip of my life. The boom gets heavy! Plenty other killer spots too
Thunderbomb? Isnt this the name of the special drink that got me in Pattaya? Apparently I was out for two days. It left me with a face tattoo, lost rectal virginity and never mentioning Thailand again.
Ouchie
Oooft, a bit of a tickle or full pénétration?!
Xox
When I cross my legs I’d bleed but time and bodies heal. No one realizes how monotonous life is when you cant cross your twigs. To live again, to live…🫶🏽
I hope you’ve found a way to empower yourself and enjoy bumsex now 😘😍🥰
Xox
Tell me it’s a tear drop
Opposite reaction over here. Make me want to book a trip with Thunderbomb.
I’m paying attention just wish the pronies would too, I would never paddle out at the regular peak but heaven forbid I get a couple nice ones down at the reef I’m surfing alone and down they come. Fuktards are fuktards no matter what board they ride.
No SUPs but we’ll allow a gang of dick draggers…#core
https://thunderbombsurf.com…
Look! They formed a bulls eye!
Now where’s that release button?
If you put the SUPing aside its a weird business tactic to post yourself “cool guying” a potential customer.
If Dane sushi salsa were around he’d post: “send lawyers guns and money” and some other shit about busses on catchpa
I really miss that guy. He was way more fun than Negatron.
It’s only been like 2 days… but yeah!
#freeDSS
and S
WHAT HAPPENED to our main man of prose?
He’s in a moderated time out apparently…. we will rebuild.
So many leaks in this vessel amazing she still floats..
NOOOOOO! I need the intellectual challenge and joy of trying to figure out his posts! This ruins my day. Negs must offer up a new badge for this sort of trangression against BG humanity.
Seems like forever
2 days without DSSS is like a year without Wiggoly.
Honduras (or havana). But close enough!
(Warren) Zevon gleaned the title for this song on one of his many adventures.
He and his label rep Burt Stein were on a trip to Kauai, Hawaii, and ended up in the company of a young lady who took them to a friend’s house.
On the way, she mentioned that her friend might not be home, in which case they’d have to break in. Zevon started thinking of the letter he’d have to write to his label boss if it got hairy. “Send lawyers,” he said. “And guns,” Stein added. “And money,” said Zevon.
As an old guy who sups due to being an old guy I’m fully on board with banning Stand Ups, most of them never learned surf rules anyway. As the old question goes, what do SUP guys hate in the line up? Another SUP guy.