"He's stuffed!"
The 2012 world surfing champ Joel Parkinson has issued a grave warning to fellow Gold Coast surfers after a mistimed rock jump that ended with his wedding ring being ripped from his finger and the champ being smashed into a volcanic rock garden.
Joel Parkinson may be better known these days for his hometown policing, his legend cemented after he tried to stop two TikTokers filming ‘emselves sliding down a muddy hill citing environmental damage and, possibly, excess noise, but his surfing bona fides are still impeccable.
However, even champs like Joel Parkinson can have a bad day, a lapse of judgement. And, at a joint like Snapper Rocks, where the intrepid surfer must dance atop the volcanic outcrops to finally be confronted by a wall of water, one mistake, as they say, and you’re cooked.
Forty-four-year-old Joel Parkinson, whose eyes spark with all their old fire and brightness and who looks younger than his age by a decade at the very least, is forced to abandon his surfboard as waves pummel him across the shelf and into a hole.
“Never underestimate the power of the ocean…even at your local!” writes Joel Parkinson. “All it took was my wedding ring – sorry babe the ocean let me have this one – hopefully you will be as kind!
Fellow Snapper Rocks devotee and three-time world champion Mick Fanning was quick to recognise the severity of the incident.
“Very lucky there mate.”
Two other world surfing champs also weighed in,
“Soo freakin sketch that visit on the rocks!! She is always ready to teach us a lesson…so stoked you pulled it!!! The sigh of relief🙌👏👏👏👏🙌is felt here mate!!” wrote Tom Carroll (world champ 83 and 84)
“Stoked yr ok mate as you know those rocks are fucking sharp you pulled a rabbit out of yr ass on that one,” wrote Gary “Kong” Elkerton, (three-time world masters champ.)
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Derek I love how everyone’s age is in there it makes me feel so young!
Been some funny footage of parko looking puffed recently 😆
comments on this one have truly hit rock bottom. actually frightened to suggest it can’t get worse for fear of what might come next.
You do know he saved about 300
People during the floods over here don’t you.?
Could be a story there….ah forget about it.
Actually good stuff , kooks n Vall,s need to pay attention , surfing isn’t all peace and selfies, it’s real the ocean rules all surfers realise at some point if your real and committed you expect to get worked.
You remind me of Bodhi
I read it in Utahs voice.
Can’t just rock-up like you own the joint…
Used JS $150 like new. hardly ridden
*Needs new fin boxes. Has tail, nose, deck & bottom dings, otherwise great condition.
“Easy Rider”
Neck minnut, “Didn’t do a perfect poo today, got a bit soft at the end, had to wipe like four times, lost my ring too, not to mention my wedding band.” Fucking hell. So much inconsequential shit posted.
Xox
is four time a lot?
Yeah. He’ll never recover.
Xox
Listen Joel, maybe you’re not looking at this right. Could be the spirit of Snapper telling you, quite cleverly, that it wants a divorce. Or at the very least a trial separation.
Study the ocean currents and get a metal detector. Anything less and he doesn’t love her.
Beachgrit’s version of a ‘slow news day’ ! It’s gotta bleed to lead Derek.
Things I don’t care about
1) woman’s surfing
2) Pat tenōres endeavors.
It’s women’s surfing and did you post on the wrong article or what?
Easy Mr. Teñōŕè
Probably the greatest grift ever. Guys smashing some gal somewhere. Forgets his ring at boo’s crib. Panic sets in. #whattadoo? It’s solid, fat swell running at the local. “Hunny can you film something…?” Well played, Sir. We see you. *golfclap
Or it got stuck up Mick’s bum?
That’s hawwwt
Xox
This could be plausible. I was today old when I learned about a thing called a Cleveland Steamer. A human performs fellatio while astride reverse cowgirl but the magic is when they/them rectally deposit lunch on your chest. Mind still blown.
So given that and I have to believe such mundane rumors of the lads using indigenous didgeridoo to search for lost treasure in each other, I contend is likely true. Also a didgeridoo well lubed is as inclusive as it gets. Using ancient native tools yet finding new modern use is a hurrah for ingenuity, the modern times and sounds like the lads have a good time. Wins for all.
“That’s not my ring it’s my watch!”
https://youtu.be/4bkDEVieAj…
His Mrs sounds like a wench
Paddles in gets up on the rocks posts on intsagram