"The region’s surfers are becoming increasingly worried that their beloved and historical surf break may finally become overcrowded."

In a series of Malibu transactions not seen since Superbad star Jonah Hill took a shine to the thirty-click beach strip a few years back, Steve Jobs’ widow has bought up almost $200 million in oceanfront real estate in the monied, and honied, city. 

Laurene Powell Jobs, who is worth fourteen billion dollars after inheriting Stevie’s stake in Apple and Disney, busted into the Malibu market in 2015 when she bought a double-parcel joint for $44 mill, swiftly bulldozing the existing house. Two years later, she bought the neighbours out for $16.5 mill and, in 2021, another neighbour for $17.5 mill.

Jobs’ latest buy is a four-acre oceanfront estate in Paradise Cove, bought off-market hence no photos, for $94 million.

Incredibly, the $94,000,000 buy ain’t the priciest sale in Malibu.

That honour goes to megastar power couple Jay-Z and Beyoncé who, last year, bought a $200 million cement bunker, designed by architect Tadao Ando, on an eight-acre parcel right there on a bluff overlooking the ocean.

At the time, concerns were raised that Malibu might become overexposed due to its colonisation by the rich and famous.

“Exciting but with this new spotlight, the region’s surfers are becoming increasingly worried that their beloved and historical surf break may finally become overcrowded,” reported Chas Smith. “Weekend mobs descended upon the wave as news of Jay-Z and Beyoncé’s new address, leaving locals kerflummoxed and befuddled. Longtime natives the Brothers Marshall posted a photo of the chaos, wondering if it was a sign of things to come.”

Want to get into Paradise Cove but don’t got the ten-mill minimum buy-in?

Nine-fifty k will buy you this pretty trailer in the Paradise Cove mobile home park.

 

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As Daddy Josh Kerr keeps on winning heats on the men's side!

We live in the age of nepotism.

In the NBA, current superstars Steph Curry and Jalen Brunson stand on the shoulders of their daddys Eddy Curry and Rick Brunson; Lebron ‘Bronny’ James Jr. gets more coverage than all his fellow draft prospects combined, despite being a fringe round two pick at best.

In Hollywood, nepo babies Dakota Johnson and Nicola Peltz Beckham enjoy professional opportunities that correlate directly to their parents’ fame and fortune, regardless of any dramatic skill they may (in Johnson’s case) or may not (in Peltz-Beckham’s case) possess.

In music, Miley Cyrus traded for years on the genes, upbringing and public profile of her now less-famous father, Billy Ray.

Politics (Trudeau), business (Trump), modelling (Hadid) – you name an industry and there, near the top, will be a scion fed with a spoon of silver and aided by the velvet-gloved hand of nepotism.

So too, in surfing.

The name Sierra Kerr has been on surf fans’ lips for years now, despite her being just 17 years old and so far lacking the competitive success enjoyed by fellow prodigies Erin Brooks (16) and Caitlin Simmers (18).

The reason?

Well, her hard-won prowess in the air and in heavy tubes to be sure, but the pre-Kerrsor (to borrow phrase from the title of her latest edit) to that prowess was surely the support of her certified ripper of a father.

Josh Kerr needs little introduction to the ardent surf fan, but let’s introduce him anyway.

He came onto the scene in the mid 2000s as the World Air Champ pushing the boundaries of the sport with such innovations as the Club Sandwich and clinching the last ever Airshow Series title in 2005.

Two years later he made the ‘CT and demonstrated his skill in waves, little and monstrous.

After a decade competing at the highest level Kerr hung up his singlet and began a new chapter as a freesurfer extraordinaire, twin-fin advocate and shrewd entrepreneur. Shortly thereafter the first clips of daughter Sierra started to drop and Kerrzy’s other major role as daddy to two young groms took centre stage.

Let us set the scene for Sierra Kerr’s triumph: Day 5 of the Nias Pro, one of the major events on the Asian/Australasian regional Qualification Series. The preceding day was of historic proportions, and the swell had built slightly overnight – not as perfect or consistent perhaps, but a foot bigger on the largest sets of the morning.

The first heat of the day saw the men resume their heroic efforts – Cooper Davies dropped a 16.70 heat total, Made Joi Satriawan 17.50, Shohei Kato 18.03. All threaded thick righthand pits for well-deserved 8s and 9s.

Then the women’s round of 32 started, and the high scores stopped.

Most of the women relied on turns, leaning their step-up boards into the fat tapering walls that follow the barrel section. Forays into the tube were all too brief, often limited by an inability to knife the critical takeoff. Willow Hardy and Piper Harrison pulled in deep, made it out and were rewarded with a 10 and a 9.70 respectively. No one else posted anything better than a 7.83 all round.

It was clear – these were not the ferocious ladies of the CT who made history earlier this year at Pipeline and Teahupo’o, putting reigning Men’s World Champ Filipe Toledo to shame with their heady mix of tenacity and skill. I wondered what barrel maestro Caity Simmers would have authored, had she been in the water.

Then Sierra Kerr stepped up, swung hard and knocked two perfect pitches right out of the park.

Her 10 point ride was a classic. The first wave ridden in the heat, none of the other women wanted to go near it. As they paddled towards the wave and over it, Sierra turned, stroked deep and dropped hard into a thick barrel. A few mini pumps and she was out, looking back at the shoreline.

“I paddled deep because everyone was wide, no one wanted it,” said Kerr after.

 

 

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Showing perfect composure, Kerr waited 23 minutes for her next wave, a skillful pump-to-highline tubride followed by a solid grabrail cuttie, netting a 6.17.

All her competitors were firmly in comboland, and Kerr had no more work to do.

Except that she did.

With just 19 seconds left she pulled into another six-foot drainer, pumped hard three times and came out nodding like a bobble head on your dashboard as you go over a particularly sharp speed bump.

9.87+10 = one of the highest ever heat totals by a female competitive surfer, a landmark effort that backs up her fans who claim she is the future of women’s surfing.

Daddy Josh was, of course, sitting in the channel about to start his next heat.

Both Kerrs made it through the rest of their matches for the day and have the chance to make the first ever father-daughter event win pairing  in any sport when finals day unfolds.

The lesson?

Don’t hate on nepotism just because the silver spoon isn’t in your mouth. Enjoy it. Revel in it.

Parenthood is a beautiful thing, and so is prodigous excellence.

So much the better when one is entwined with the other.

Jack's daddy Trev, also his coach, told The Australian in 2010 that he was “hand-rearing a racehorse”.

The jaw-dropping physique and rodent good looks of the man dubbed by surf fans as Australia’s John John Florence have again come into relief following a photo shoot for the Australian franchise of Gentleman’s Quarterly. 

Jack Robinson, a twenty-six-year-old daddy of one, Zen, and husband of model wife Julia Muniz, appears in the magazine alongside fellow Australian surf Olympian Ethan Ewing whose baby face and “overwhelming ass” have long thrilled surf fans on both sides of the gender divide. 

 

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The mesmeric pull and fascination the world has for the two men is evident in a long profile by GQ, although it is Jack Robinson who steals the show and, as previously noted, his surf-honed deltoids deliver a raw sexuality generally only noted in big-dicked black guys and rarely seen in white males. 

Let’s read a little. 

By the time Robinson was 12, he was already being called the next Kelly Slater. At that point, he had won the West Australian state championship in the under-12 division—when he was just eight—and made the finals in the under-12, under-14 and under-16 divisions. He had surfed 10-foot waves at Hawaii’s famous Pipeline, could land aerial moves some pros couldn’t, and had signed a deal with Quicksilver before he was even a teenager.

But underneath the bleached-blond bowl cut and big smile, Robinson was dealing with the pressure from his talent, from his sponsors and from his father Trev, also his coach, who told The Australian in 2010 that he was “hand-rearing a racehorse”.

Examine the full spread, as they say, here. 

It isn’t the first time the world has thrilled to Jack Robinson’s “awesome abs and belly button”.

Two years ago, Jack and wife Julia appeared in a cover story for London-based fashion magazine Man About Town, channelling the iconic 1983 Bruce Weber shoot of a then teenage Laird Hamilton and movie star Brooke Shields.