"Nazaré North Canyon reaches depths of about 5,000m creating an ideal destination for any surfer, from novice to expert."

Surfing, man. What was once the domain of dropouts and derelicts has transmorphed, in the last decade, into a theater of the rich, driven and motivated. I don’t know who, besides Sam George, Zach Weisberg or “Jake Howard,” felt it a good idea to make this place easy to access but, man, what a rotten bit of business.

Here we are, though, with George pushing carbon fiber paddles, “Howard” staking the outer corners of the “big tent” and Weisberg wake surfing in a tuxedo.

Extremely embarrassing but lucrative for a handful of enterprising vulnerable adult learners?

Yes, a travel agency trade group, hours ago, published the best “off the beaten path” surf locations on earth and which “secret spot” topped the list?

Nazare.

Hospitality.net brazenly declared:

Boasting arguably the biggest rideable waves in the world, Nazaré is known as one of the best beaches in Portugal, and even globally. The source of these perfect large waves is the underwater Nazaré North Canyon, which reaches depths of about 5,000m, creating an ideal destination for any surfer, from novice to expert.

From novice to expert? And imagine the Covid-era surf adopter with a few years under her belt, looking for a new challenge, taking hospitality.net up and paddling Nazare’s “perfect large waves” on a relatively new 8 foot performance egg.

Imagine the legal action her family will take when “Nazaré is known as one of the best beaches in Portugal, and even globally. The source of these perfect large waves is the underwater Nazaré North Canyon, which reaches depths of about 5,000m, creating an ideal destination for any surfer, from novice to expert” pops up on browser search.

Travel agents shaking heads in dismay while pooling money and blaming artificial intelligence/”Jake Howard.”

Rightly so. It’s better if it all goes the way of plastic to-go coffee cup lids in Paris.

Erased from memory and replaced with paper to-go coffee cup lids that leave a nice film on the lips.

Yum.

"May he continue to have fun on his yachts. I prefer to work."

Meta chief Mark Zuckerberg brought joy and smiles to all Americans, over the 4th of July weekend, but especially to those who call the surf community home. The humanoid, dressed in a tuxedo whilst holding an American flag and drinking a banquet beer, posted a video of himself pumping the wake of a boat and penned, “Happy Birthday America.”

Surfers everywhere, but especially notable professional ones, immediately jumped in to their good friend Zuck’s feed, fluffing etc. Maui’s Billy Kemper, for example, declared, “Next one in the barrel. I’ll tow you in!” And though the world’s 4th richest man hinted at a serious injury, seemed to be game.

Very impressive to everyone except Elon Musk. The South African inventor has had long running beef with Zuckerberg. Much dislike and, thus, the world’s richest man responded to the clip extremely dismissively, stating on his X, “May he continue to have fun on his yachts. I prefer to work.”

Ouch.

While the multi-billionaire’s dig reverberated, it did not seem to land with the aforementioned notable professional surfers whom did not respond with cloying attempts to be seen on his feed. I would imagine the world’s most notable professional surfer Kelly Slater felt very torn. He has professed admiration for Musk, in the past, though may feel that Zuck has more to offer in the way of fun and yachts.

If you had to be best friends with one of the two, which would you choose?

What if Amazon’s Jeff Bezos is thrown into the mista?

Here in Paris, Match Magazine, “intéressé au fondateur d’Amazon, Jeff Bezos, et son couple avec Lauren Sanchez, celle qui fût sa maîtresse et a précipité son mariage vers le divorce. Le magazine souligne notamment la transformation physique du milliardaire.”

Do you have any thoughts about the world’s 2nd richest man’s “transformation physique?” Turning into a big ol’ muscle?

Notable professional surfers seem to be light in his comments too. Maybe more intimidating than li’l Mark?

More questions than answers, I suppose.

"Angelo Pappas 2024."

It is election day, today, in France and the punditry is calling it one of the most important of the last century. I have no doubt that it might be true with the right leaning Rassemblement National surging much to Macron and his center left Renaissance on the ropes. Tense etc. but one wouldn’t know it ambling through the gorgeous streets whistling La Vie en Rose especially if one is American.

Yes, at least the various French candidates don’t have full blown dementia unlike the staggering octogenarian candidates across the proverbial pond in the United States of America.

There President Joe Biden continues to shed support after his senile debate performance against challenger Donald J. Trump. While the surf vote had been firmly behind the Dark Brandon thanks to a 2020 endorsement from Surfer Magazine, it has just joined the exodus after beloved actor Gary Busey posted a stirring birthday tribute from his 80th.

“It’s my #birthday week! The big 80!” the famous Big Wednesday and Point Break actor penned.

Surfers immediately recognized the energy, the agile mind and compared it to Sleepy Joe’s comatose stare.

“You don’t look a day over 150,” one supporter gushed.

“Angelo Pappas 2024,” another added.

Could the Hollywood star replace Biden on the ballot? It’s anyone’s guess at this point, to be honest.