Mark Zuckerberg (left) and his sworn enemy Elon Musk (right)
Mark Zuckerberg (left) and his sworn enemy Elon Musk (right)

Elon Musk savages Mark Zuckerberg for surfing on the 4th of July

"May he continue to have fun on his yachts. I prefer to work."

Meta chief Mark Zuckerberg brought joy and smiles to all Americans, over the 4th of July weekend, but especially to those who call the surf community home. The humanoid, dressed in a tuxedo whilst holding an American flag and drinking a banquet beer, posted a video of himself pumping the wake of a boat and penned, “Happy Birthday America.”

Surfers everywhere, but especially notable professional ones, immediately jumped in to their good friend Zuck’s feed, fluffing etc. Maui’s Billy Kemper, for example, declared, “Next one in the barrel. I’ll tow you in!” And though the world’s 4th richest man hinted at a serious injury, seemed to be game.

Very impressive to everyone except Elon Musk. The South African inventor has had long running beef with Zuckerberg. Much dislike and, thus, the world’s richest man responded to the clip extremely dismissively, stating on his X, “May he continue to have fun on his yachts. I prefer to work.”

Ouch.

While the multi-billionaire’s dig reverberated, it did not seem to land with the aforementioned notable professional surfers whom did not respond with cloying attempts to be seen on his feed. I would imagine the world’s most notable professional surfer Kelly Slater felt very torn. He has professed admiration for Musk, in the past, though may feel that Zuck has more to offer in the way of fun and yachts.

If you had to be best friends with one of the two, which would you choose?

What if Amazon’s Jeff Bezos is thrown into the mista?

Here in Paris, Match Magazine, “intéressé au fondateur d’Amazon, Jeff Bezos, et son couple avec Lauren Sanchez, celle qui fût sa maîtresse et a précipité son mariage vers le divorce. Le magazine souligne notamment la transformation physique du milliardaire.”

Do you have any thoughts about the world’s 2nd richest man’s “transformation physique?” Turning into a big ol’ muscle?

Notable professional surfers seem to be light in his comments too. Maybe more intimidating than li’l Mark?

More questions than answers, I suppose.

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See Stephanie Gilmore’s stunning 60th birthday J-Bay tribute to Tom Curren!

"Perfection," says Kai Lenny.

The eight-time champion of the world Stephanie Gilmore has filed a stunning tribute to old man Tom Curren, who turned sixty on July 3.

The quasi-retired Stephanie Gilmore, who is thirty-six, was in Jeffrey’s Bay for an exhibition event there and inspired by the great Sonny Miller’s 1993 film Searching for Tom Curren, and which featured Curren’s perfectly tuned second ride wave at J-Bay, Stephanie figured she’d have a shot at replicating the still-lauded beauty of Curren’s ride.

She commissioned the same purple and black suit from Rip Curl and a replica 6’6″x18 1/4 x 2 5/16  thruster, complete with its sexy little bonzer channels, from Australian shaper Mark Rabbidge, who made Curren his J-Bay quiver.

“I recently rewatched Searching for Tom Curren and it was more profound this time around than ever before,” writes Stephanie Gilmore. “His surfing, brought to the screen by Sonny Miller, is as timeless a piece of surf film art as there ever could be. So when I booked to go to Jbay this year, I asked @ripcurl to make me a suit that was similar to Tom’s in the film and I asked @mark_rabbidge_surf_design_ to make me the replica board from Tom’s iconic first wave. A 6’6 thruster with glass on fins. Here is a frame grab by @danscotttt from one of the sessions. All I really wanted was to get an image like this. Very simple I suppose. A driving bottom turn on a perfect Jeffrey’s wave. @curfuffle.”

 

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Kai Lenny described the coupling of Curren’s equipment and Stephanie Gilmore as, simply, “perfection.”

Watch Curren’s wave here.

 

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Kelly Slater fails to sell beachfront compound.
Kelly Slater, inset, fails to sell sprawling beachfront compound at Laniakea on Oahu's North Shore.

Kelly Slater fails to sell redundant $20 million beachfront compound on North Shore’s most coveted street!

Fire sale prices hit the North Shore of Oahu!

Real estate is a tough game to play, but few know when to hold and fold better than Kelly Slater whose landholdings span the globe. Three months ago, Slater listed his sprawling Laniakea compound on “the most coveted street on the North Shore” for twenty mill, almost triple what he paid for it seven years earlier.

The reason for the surprise listing is unclear, although maybe the joint, as grand as it is, was more trouble than it was worth. 

An examination of its price history on Zillow reveals Kelly Slater listed it for rent in 2018 for 80k a month, dropped it to 72k in 2019, 59k in 2019 before sitting on 45k in 2020.

No word if anyone actually took up the rental, even at the cut-price rate of 10k a week.

If you didn’t know, Laniakea is a little way off the super highway traffic of Pipeline, Rockies and Sunset. It’s back on the western side of Waimea Bay and is a raw righthand point break that will reward the intrepid surfer who ain’t afraid to brave the paddle that is also home to the less-than-friendly Hawaiian tiger shark. If you like lefts, just around the headland is a joint called Jocko’s.

In summer time, great place to watch turtles cruising the shallows. I once busted a kid’s goggles I swiped in my joy at seeing the happy animals when I tried tofu ’em over my fat head.

Kelly Slater house North Shore Oahu
The surprisingly modest street frontage at Kelly Slater’s Lani’s house.
Kelly Slater house North Shore Oahu
Kelly Slater’s Lani’s house.
Kelly Slater North Shore house
Located on the most coveted street on the North Shore of Oahu, this exclusive beachfront estate is the premier offering in Haleiwa, Hawai’i. Set on an oceanfront lot traversing over a half acre, this compound encompasses elegant living while embracing the barefoot luxury lifestyle of the North Shore.

Anyway, three months on the market and no bites, a reflection, maybe, of its inflated price. It’s interesting to note the previous owner tried to sell it for twenty-two mill almost ten years ago and settled on the almost-eight mill Kelly Slater paid.

Closer to the action around Sunset and Pipe etc, beachfront houses are being sold for fire sale prices after the gov told owners they had to remove their rock retaining walls, and at their own expense.

Check this pretty little house, complete with separate studio, for one-and-a-half-mill.

Cheap, if you don’t mind watching your joint melt into the ocean. 

 

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Surf vote abandons Biden after beloved actor Gary Busey posts lively 80th birthday tribute to self

"Angelo Pappas 2024."

It is election day, today, in France and the punditry is calling it one of the most important of the last century. I have no doubt that it might be true with the right leaning Rassemblement National surging much to Macron and his center left Renaissance on the ropes. Tense etc. but one wouldn’t know it ambling through the gorgeous streets whistling La Vie en Rose especially if one is American.

Yes, at least the various French candidates don’t have full blown dementia unlike the staggering octogenarian candidates across the proverbial pond in the United States of America.

There President Joe Biden continues to shed support after his senile debate performance against challenger Donald J. Trump. While the surf vote had been firmly behind the Dark Brandon thanks to a 2020 endorsement from Surfer Magazine, it has just joined the exodus after beloved actor Gary Busey posted a stirring birthday tribute from his 80th.

“It’s my #birthday week! The big 80!” the famous Big Wednesday and Point Break actor penned.

Surfers immediately recognized the energy, the agile mind and compared it to Sleepy Joe’s comatose stare.

“You don’t look a day over 150,” one supporter gushed.

“Angelo Pappas 2024,” another added.

Could the Hollywood star replace Biden on the ballot? It’s anyone’s guess at this point, to be honest.

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Victoria Feige and Kelly Slater.
The gorgeous and inspirational Victoria Feige and Kelly Slater, also gorgeous, vivacious eyes etc, and inspirational.

Kelly Slater leads push for inclusion of para-surfing at LA 2028 Olympic Games!

“We need 10,000 signatures!” says champ.

While it might’ve been a little difficult to include para-surfing at the Paris 2024 Olympic Games, which is being held at a wave so difficult to master even world champions, or at least one, is given pause, the push to include para-surfers at LA in four years is gathering steam. 

And, Kelly Slater, the world’s greatest surfer who narrowly avoided becoming the child of billionaires when his parents knocked back an offer to buy half of Telluride, investing instead in Cocoa Beach, Florida, has come out swinging on behalf of para-surfers. 

In a piece to camera posted on Instagram, Slater appears alongside five-times para-surfing world champ Victoria Feige, the gorgeous smiling face of para-surfing who would up in a chair when she busted her back after a snowboard jump went real bad.

 

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The pair are at the 44th Annual Da Hui Paddle Race, which Slater had just won.

And, as Feige explains how parasurfing has been accepted by the ISA and the paralympics as worthy of inclusion into the Games, Kelly, wound up like a spring, jumps in,“We need 10 000 signatures, only two thousand now, right?”

Yeah, says Feige,

“We need 10,000 signatures. Help us push para-surfing in the Paralympics.”

As the beach commentator booms, Slater Slater continues,

“We’re trying to overpower the speaking back there, but if you guys could support the para-surfing at the Olympics in Los Angeles, it would be great… We just need a few signatures to get you guys in the water.”

Sign the petition here!

 

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