"I don't know why I said there were rules. Maybe I was drinking."

Now, tales of the Southern California gang Bay Boys have long been shared by surfers to their children as horrifying bedtime stories in order to keep young charges on edge and alert. “Be careful tonight, li’l Koa, or the Bay Boys will come through your windows, build a makeshift fort in your room and tell you to ‘scrub it.'”

The notorious association guarding Palos Verdes’ Lunada Bay have long been in the news but, more recently, brought to trial for being dangerous and lewd. Various witnesses describing levels of vicious intimidation rarely seen outside of the Amazon jungle. Exposing genitalia, for instance, when changing out of wetsuits or throwing rocks near to people.

One case, currently winding through the courts, though is quickly unraveling and with it the Bay Boys’ reputation as more dangerous than MS13. Two Bay Boys were examined during the civil proceedings. First, Sang Lee how had been busted for sending a rambling email to other Bay Boys in which he called himself a pirate and said he would “die by these rules.”

The honorable plaintiffs attorney Vic Otten asked him, “Is it true that you believe Lunada Bay belongs to you and a select group of people?” Lee responded, “No, I don’t think so. It has a special place in my heart. We try to clean up the area…” then said the wave was not “world-class” merely “better than average.”

Next, Otten asked him about the “rules.” Lee answered, “What are the rules? There’s no rules. I don’t know why I said that…” before adding “I don’t know, maybe I was drinking.”

In regards to the “pirate” reference, Lee replied he called himself one because, “I kind of like pirates.”

When plaintiff Thomas Long was called, he admitted under cross examination that he was simply told the “things he was doing were not inconsistent with surfing etiquette” and that he’d never been threatened or subjected to violence.

The judge, Honorable Lawrence Riff, became visibly frustrated when told there were 17 victims waiting to share their stories of woe, sighing, “It will be unduly cumulative, and will be an undue consumption of time.” He then said settling the case would be best for everyone.

According to the plaintiff’s second attorney, Mr. Franklin, their clients don’t want money but rather “want the city to install a panoply of improvements to encourage public access: signs welcoming visitors and pointing them toward available parking, upgrades to the steep and rocky ‘goat trail’ leading down to the beach making it easier to descend, a blufftop sea telescope, as well as seating, water fountains bike racks and railing all along the blufftop.”

Sounds fun.

More as the story develops.

"It’s a slice of heaven and it’s getting really crappy.”

Ahhhh summer in coastal Southern California. A blanket of gray that lovingly smothers the Pacific touching bits into middle July. Millions, cooking inland, fleeing their god-forsaken lands to cool themselves in the temperate waters. The joys of cultural mingling and understanding.

Except this year where rage is percolating and particularly in Laguna Beach long known for its surf adjacency (Gotcha was headquartered here) and gentle artists (once a year people pretend to be in paintings).

But you recall learning of the Laguna Beach surf-artist who roped off a portion of sand in front of her house then screamed expletives at a mother and child daring trespass.

She, it appears, just the tip of the spear. The entire community is up in arms, mad as hell and, apparently, not willing to take it any more. Local Greg Viviani goes down to the beach and picks up loads of trash himself, also finding empty bottles of green apple flavored Smirnoff Ice and sex toys, according to The Los Angeles Times. “It never ends,” he told the paper. “You can clean it all up in one day and it’ll be covered with trash tomorrow.”

Others, calling it “destructive tourism” are pushing city officials to do something about the mess and taking out local advertisements targeting “litter, cigarette smoke and loud vehicle exhaust.”

“I know we’re all very protective of our community, but we’re getting this everywhere, and I don’t think we can necessarily expect it to change because it gets hot inland and people just pour in here,” Mayor Sue Kempf said at a city council meeting. “It’s a problem.”

Joanne McMahon, who grew up either in or near Laguna Beach, felt the issue was tourist promotion, declaring, “I feel like we’re promoting tourism to the point of just over impact. Why do we need to continue to promote this for visitors? We can’t handle what we’ve got now” later adding, “It’s a slice of heaven and it’s getting really crappy.”

War in paradise.

Which side would you take? Ciggies and Smirnoffs or Pageant of Masters?