Horror surf fan wipeout at Waimea credited with reduced traffic for ’24 Eddie

"People drowning in both water and tears..."

While tens of thousands of surf fans made the trek to Waimea Bay in order to witness the historic running of the Eddie Aikau Big Wave Invitational, locals were shocked at the overall lack of traffic. The chaotic mess of last year’s Eddie wherein bumper to bumper traffic extended from Haleiwa all the way to Waimea but a vague memory.

Hawaii News Now reporters on the ground credited the smooth flow to county officials not allowing parking at Waimea, itself, and also the horror surf fan wipeout that left many wet and scared.

Watch here.

“City officials and community groups encouraged people to watch the competition from home and online,” the newscaster declared with the encouragement apparently working. Surf fans watching from home noticing thinner than usual crowds on the bluffs and beach of the iconic bay.

A man on vacation with his family and from Tennessee, however, needed to see the show in person so parked in Haleiwa and they all began the six mile march before thinking better of it, returning to their vehicle and trying to find a spot closer to the action. “We’re just trying to drive up, drop them off and then if I have to park the car three miles away and hike it I’ll do it. That’s fine. This is a once in a lifetime thing,” he shared.

Which brings up two important questions:

1. What is the farthest you have ever walked in order to watch a surfing competition?

2. What is the farthest you would theoretically walk?

More as the story develops.

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Laura Enever and Landon McNamara, a tale of two Eddies.
Laura Enever and Landon McNamara, a tale of two Eddies.

Laura Enever rushed to hospital after horror wipeout in “sixty-foot” surf at Eddie Aikau Big Wave Invitational

And son of Pipe legend Liam McNamara, singer, songwriter, model Landon McNamara scoops the win!

The world’s fourth sexiest big-wave surfer Laura Enever has been rushed to hospital, and emergency surgery, after a horror wipeout at the Eddie Aikau Big Wave Invitational, held in what Billy Kemper described, with characteristic hyperbole, as sixty foot.

Laura Enever, who is thirty-three and who learned and polished her formidable skills at Sydney’s North Narrabeen, holds the Guinness world record for biggest wave ever paddled into by a woman and was, therefore, an automatic start in the prestigious big-wave event.

You play you pay, as they say in the Islands, and Enever got it good.

“Unfortunately the Waimea shore break and my fin had other plans,” Enever posted, as she waited to go under the knife. “In knee deep water my board hit the back of my leg. I touched my leg and my fingers went in deep. A massive hole in my leg and what’s looking like a vascular injury… Crushed it ended this way but I had the most incredible morning ever beforehand. Thank you for all the love and thank you to spectators and Joey who helped me up the beach and lifeguards and emergency crew for looking after me.”

Landon McNamara, meanwhile, sealed his win in the penultimate heat of the day with a perfect ride.

 

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“I was following a turtle out there. For real. That to me was the Spirit of Eddie, and Eddie chooses who wins. I’m just so thankful he picked me,” said Landon.

 

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Five years earlier, Pipe habitué Landon McNamara, born and raised at Rocky Point by a daddy who invented the chop-hop and whose own Pipe appearances were electrifying, came within inches of losing his face after an ill-timed drop in that nearly resulted in his scalping.

Landon wins fifty gees and a chair in that hallowed pantheon of Eddie winners, which also includes John John Florence, Kelly Slater and Eddie’s brother Clyde.

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Live Chat: Eddie Aikau Big Wave Invitational!

The bay calls the day.

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Kelly Slater fat shames fat influencer
Adi Gutierrez, main photo, and Kelly Slater, assistant health cop to RFK Jr.

“Fatty” influencer Adi Gutierrez under fire from world’s greatest surfer Kelly Slater

TikTok queen of “What I ate today” videos lanced by one of Kelly Slater’s famous barbs…

Emboldened, perhaps, by his surf-buddy RFJ Jr’s elevation to head of America’s Department of Health, Kelly Slater has launched a stinging barb at one of TikTok queen Adi Gutirrez’s epic “What I Ate Today” videos. 

And by epic, I mean epic: Adi is a “Fatty” influencer with an appetite that won’t quit.

In her posts, the two-fifty pounder with the pretty face, dewy skin and well-manicured eyebrows details the delicious treats she inhales in the course of a day which are, wrapped, mostly, in sugar and saturated fats.

In the video that raised Kelly Slater’s ire, Adi enjoys a glazed doughnut dunked in milk, fried chicken dunked in the same milk, for breakfast, then followed it up through the course of the day with some big red drinks, ice cream etc. 

 

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It’s hard to know if Adi is trolling or if it’s some kind of fatty Only Fans schtick aimed at feeders, but she plays the crowd well. Adi knows what shocks and what delights. 

Kelly Slater, known for his commitment to good health and who is ageing at a rate far less than the average human being, a man whose online feuds are legendary, pounced on the absurdity of her diet. 

“This is sad,” wrote Slater, one of almost forty-one thousand comments on the video.

Slater’s comment was liked a whipping 16,700 times and generated almost one hundred replies, almost all in favour of Slater.

“Ur such a legend.” 

“Goat knows.”

“The Goat.” 

“The Goat himself.” 

“And degrading.” 

“Goddamn I love how I am on the same ago as the GOAT.” 

“Legend.” 

“RFK about to change everything.” 

A few pro-Adi commenters pushed back. 

“What’s sad is you giving a fuck.” 

“Bring back bullying, am I right?” 

Fat influencers, like Adi, as well as the great Tess Holiday, titanic Ashley Graham, Africa-sized Lizzo, are content creators who focus on promoting body positivity, fat acceptance, and self-love for larger body sizes.

Is Kelly Slater is one the right or wrong side of history on this issue, y’think?

I like ’em big, as long as there’s some muscle tone and the breath isn’t polluted too bad by the fried gear but do find these videos a little nauseous as I have a weak stomach.

You?

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Kelly Slater (maybe) surfing The Eddie.
Kelly Slater (maybe) surfing The Eddie.

Surf fans squeal with delight as The Eddie called on for Sunday!

Green means go.

Lady and gentlemen surf fans, dig out your most comfortable surf-watching pants, throw the roast in the oven and otherwise clear Sunday’s schedule. For tomorrow The Eddie Aikau Big Wave Invitational runs. Yes, the Bay has officially called the day and our heroes and heroines will paddle into morning glory.

It all gets underway at 8:00 am, Hawaii time, wherein contest organizers will peer over the horizon to make sure the promised swell has arrived.

The aforementioned lady and gentlemen surf fans who happen to be on Oahu and would like to watch from the cliffs can arrive at 4:00 am and park in Waimea Valley for the low, low cost of $50.

It will be The Eddie’s eleventh running.

I was on those cliffs watching myself during the eighth Eddie. The year was 2009, the day December 8th, and I was on Oahu’s North Shore malingering about. Word spread quickly that the contest was going to go and a palpable thrill hung heavy on that tropical air. I felt watching it would be silly and planned on spending the day in Honolulu, nursing a fine Mai Tai at the Royal Hawaiian. Alas, Stab’s Sam McIntosh was flying in and I picked him up from the airport. I told him that we would not be heading north but rather into town for Mai Tai’s as soon as his luggage had been secured. He gave me an odd look and gently asked if we could maybe try to catch the contest. I told him it was silly but wanted to be a good host so relented.

In retrospect, Sam was right and I was very glad to have witnessed the mayhem.

Live chat, here, tomorrow.

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