"Is that a 200ft wave?"

New year, new you. Or is it? Did 2025 dawn with a renewed sense of ambition, focus, energy or do you feel much like you did at the end of 2024 only grimmer? Well, in either case, the world record for largest wave ever surfed might have just been shattered on Christmas Eve Eve and not at the newer normals Nazare or Jaws but trusty ol’ Mavericks.

Newsweek is reporting that a wave ridden by Alessandro “Alo” Slebir on Dec. 23 towered over 108 ft. The current record belongs, of course, to Sebastian Steudtner and his 86-footer tacked out at the aforementioned Portuguese Python.

A who’s who of big wave greats immediately weighed in on the legendary feat.

Kai Lenny declared, “100 foot wave.”

Thomas Victor Carroll added, “Biggest one!! Easy 100ft+”

Koa Rothman wondered, “Is that a 200ft wave?”

Bianca Valenti remarked, “That’s gotta be a world record.”

Slebir humbly opined, “Regardless of the number, it really doesn’t matter how big the wave was to me. It was really the biggest wave of my life and that’s all I really care about at the moment.”

Of the wave itself, he shared, “It felt different. When I turned at the bottom, it felt like I was being sucked back up the face. I knew it was a big wave, but the speed made it hard to grasp just how big. When I reached the channel and heard the cheers, I realized it was something extraordinary.”

Extraordinary indeed.

Wow.

Gotcha.

California’s annual drunk-driving awards were awash, last night, in typical glitz and glamor as various cities and towns gathered to see which among them would win the coveted crown. Bakersfield, Sacramento, Lemoore, Huntington Beach, Valencia, Fresno, Castroville and Fremont all hopeful beyond hope. The big dogs San Francisco, Los Angeles and San Diego quietly confident. But when the envelope was opened, a gasp filled the gilded Long Beach convention hall.

“This year’s drunk-driving capital of California is…”

“…”

“……”

“…..Laguna Beach!”

It was the 20th consecutive win for the seaside hamlet of 22,000.

While hard-partying surf brands Gotcha and More Core Division once called Laguna home, experts credit the wild string of drunk-driving with the amount of tourists who drunk-drive to the town throughout the year, numbering some 6.5 million.

City officials have, days ago, embarked on a mission of bringing local restaurants and bars into the spotlight. Now, when a person is stopped for DUI, or driving under the influence, police will send a letter to the business that served up his or her last drink, informing them of the time, place and blood-alcohol level.

Laguna Beach Police Chief Jeff Calvert declared, “It’s not intended to be punitive because the business owners don’t know what they don’t know. So it’s an opportunity for them to look at whether there’s a pattern with certain bartenders overserving or do some additional education with not only their bartenders, but their security staff.”

Mayor Alex Rounaghi added, “The data shows us this is a problem that we need to address and I think this is a really very innovative, collaborative and data-driven way of doing that. Any time that we can save a life and prevent future deaths it’s important for us to do that.”

Huntington Beach, it is reported, once considered publicly identifying drunk drivers on the city’s Facebook page.

Ivan Spiers, who owns restaurants Mozambique and Skyloft, opined that the letters don’t fix the problem of drunk drivers, saying, “It’s bureaucracy and a waste of money and time.”

Don’t drunk drive on New Year’s Eve and force Ivan Spiers to read about your blood-alcohol level.

Annoying.