"My real point is that voting for Trump is as bad if not worse than supporting Tate."

It is difficult to say where Stab Magazine’s headquarters is today. Once based in Bondi, Australia before moving to Venice, California before moving to Oceanside, also California, chasing that very-difficult-to-grab “cool” perpetually five-to-seven years too late. Online is, anyhow, where the subscription surf website finds itself today and online is where the trouble arises.

After a series of failed big-for-britches editors writing in Stab’s “royal we” vernacular, the blog landed on one Mikey “Michael” Ciaramella, the pocket-sized pal who declares “creating small fires and putting them out, one day at a time” as current job description on LinkedIn.

Well, small fire lit, though not put out today after the diminutive fella went on a wild anti-Trump pro-Andrew Tate screed in his very own comment section. The unfortunate turn occurred in a pompous “exclusive’ interview probing superstar surfboard shaper Matt Biolos’s lawsuit against hideous actress Lady Gaga’s use of the word “Mayhem.”

Readers might have been less-than-completely-interested as some questioned why Lost team rider Cole Houshmand’s recent celebration of self-proclaimed woman hater Andrew Tate was not, at the very least, brought up.

“In what universe is a mid-pack CT surfer taking a picture with some internet troll more interesting than Matt Biolos suing Lady fucking Gaga (and potentially winning)?” Ciaramella penned after an apparently misguided below-the-line critic dared ask why the story wasn’t covered.

Though he wasn’t done, continuing after a few more light barbs directed his way:

You do know who a majority of Americans voted into office last year, right?

26 sexual assault accusations against Trump, 34 felony charges, and he’s big fan of Epstein — “It is even said that he likes beautiful women as much as I do, and many of them are on the younger side.”

San Clemente is a Republican town, and several past and current CT surfers have come out publicly as Trump supporters. I’d imagine more of them lean that way quietly as well.

That, to me, is far more condemning (and interesting) than a thoughtless IG story post. And yet it’s not something we cover because 1. politics aren’t our lane and 2. supporting a predator doesn’t necessarily make you one too.

After general confusion over the li’l buddy’s pronouncement delivered from a very tall horse, Ciaramella continued:

My real point is that voting for Trump is as bad if not worse than supporting Tate. Yet somehow, voting for Trump seems to be broadly accepted in the surf world, while posting an IG story with Tate has people up in arms.

I personally find both Trump and Tate despicable. Maybe Cole loves both of them (or not). You’re more than welcome to be upset about what he posted, but this doesn’t make it a story for Stab.

Ummm.

Wait. What’s not a story for Stab?

Getting swole.

Through three World Surf League events this year, Brazil’s Italo Ferreira has a dominant lead over the rest of the field. A third place at Pipeline, win in Abu Dhabi and second at the just-wrapped MEO Rip Curl Pro Portugal has netted the former champion a whopping 23,885 points, over 6000 points more than his nearest competitor.

Absolutely dominant though might Ferreira be… bored?

Seeking new thrills?

A whole new competitive arena?

A stunning new social media post shows the effervescent goofy-foot in the gym working out, leg pressing 600 kg while an entirely strong man looks on. That’s 1322.77 lbs for the metric-deficient.

The current world leg press record is held by bodybuilding legend Ronnie Coleman who pushed 1043 kg (2300 lbs) for multiple reps. Ferreira over halfway there. Now, do you imagine world’s strongest man competitions and/or bodybuilding pay better than competitive professional surfing? Do you think people are more impressed with big muscles than cat-like ocean reflexes?

Back when I was in college, a skinny pal and I thought it would be a good idea to “get huge.” We would go to 24 Hour Fitness and bench press, squat etc. then go to McDonald’s and eat 20 cheeseburgers because they were on sale for $1 each.

It didn’t work.

"It’s disappointing — but hardly surprising — that someone is now attempting to capitalize on (Lady Gaga's) success..."

The legal war between Lost Surfboards and Lady Gaga has escalated extremely quickly. Hours ago, surf fans learned that the San Clemente-based operation sued the songstress over the use of the word “Mayhem.” Ms. Gaga’s sixth studio album, released March 7, 2025, is titled “Mayhem,” you see, and written in “cool twelve-year-old-boy” font.

Lost has, of course, used “Mayhem” on its surfboards for much time and has officially owned the mark since 2015.

Biolos and co. asked Team Gaga to cease and desist though after allegedly being ignored filed suit.

Not content to wait for judge and jury, Ms. Gaga’s lawyer Orin Snyder blasted Lost, telling TMZ, “It’s disappointing — but hardly surprising — that someone is now attempting to capitalize on her success with a baseless lawsuit over the name ‘Mayhem.’ This is nothing more than an opportunistic and meritless abuse of the legal system.”

Ouch.

But do you think that Lost is ready to go scorched earth over the issue or do you imagine that a strongly worded statement implying coattail riding will be enough to send the World Surf League’s winningest board shaper to the hills?

The ball, as it were, officially in Lost’s court.

Enjoy some music whilst waiting for the return.