"Local surfers riding on motorcycles were speeding and allegedly attacked them and punched them in the face."
You remember a joint called Cloud 9, a good but real inconsistent and short right-hander, on the island of Siargao and right there in the town of General Luna in the Philippines?
Spent one of the wilder two weeks trying to escape that joint back in the nineties, the flat spell with nothin’ in sight driving us all mad, guns, three-ways, four-ways, the highlight of the vacay one of the gang playing a prank on the biz class passengers on Philippine Airlines warning of imminent crash etc. The hostess played along, gave him the mic, laughs all around. Better times etc.
The last time Cloud 9 filled these pages was ten months back when it was revealed kooks would be banned from the lineup unless accompanied by a paid local instructor.
Anyway, two Israeli tourists had the hell beaten out of ‘em in General Luna the other night, ostensibly for having a piss in the middle of the road but, likely given the response, ‘cause they were Jews.
On the Facebook page, Siargao Secret we read,
Two Israelis were brought to a popular clinic in General Luna at around 2AM last night because allegedly a group of local surfers mauled them. They sustained severe facial injuries. According to witnesses, one was a tuktuk driver(?), the 2 Israelis were in the middle of the road in front of Lamari and they were walking and minding their own business (probably drunk too because we were at a party near Tuason) when local surfers riding on motorcycles were speeding and allegedly attacked them and punched them in the face. I guess the locals were pissed because this isn’t the first time these young Israelis do their business in the middle of the road, more so a HIGHWAY. They were brought to the hospital instead because the injuries were very bad.
Of the almost three hundred responses, nearly all celebrated the attack.
Yehey!!!! Finally good news.
Well deserved.
THIS IS GOOD NEWS.
Finally.
Go go locals.
Good.
Free Palestine!!!
Deserve.
Well done.
Deserved. More of this.
A lone standout among the crowd, hows, BeachGrit habitué John Callahan.
With the entire monocultural native Siargao Island community being raised from birth as rabid Catholics, this community has found a group of people even easier to hate than their own Mindanao Muslims – the Jews.
John Callahan, of course, introduced the world to Cloud 9 in 1992, along with surfers Evan Slater and Taylor Knox. They named the peak Cloud 9 after a delicious local confectionary.
Read about that adventure here!
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Kick out all zionist garbage
Palestine is a European colonial invention dumas.
You don’t read, you don’t study, you don’t even finish a sentence—but you’ve got a villain picked out and a speech ready. That’s not insight, that’s laziness with a target.
You’re mad at people for knowing things. Think about that. You turned curiosity into a crime because it makes you feel small. So instead of learning, you swing at whoever reminds you that you could.
You shout about “control” while refusing to control your own ignorance. You call it a conspiracy; it’s really just your attention span tapping out.
And the bigotry? That’s the cheapest shortcut in the book. When you can’t explain the world, you blame a group and call it a theory. No evidence, no reading—just anger dressed up like an argument.
Real thinking takes work. It takes reading, listening, changing your mind. But that’s heavy lifting, and you’d rather throw punches than pick up a book.
So you don’t read—and then you attack the people who do.
Antisemitism… that’s not an opinion, that’s a mental shortcut for people too lazy to understand the world. ‘Things aren’t going my way? Must be the Jews!’ Yeah, great detective work, Sherlock. Real deep thinking there.”
Isn’t it amazing? You’ve got people standing on stolen land taken in 1788 or 1840 or whenever the paperwork said ‘yeah, we own this now,’ yelling about stolen land… into a smartphone… on Wi-Fi… paid for with a mortgage… backed by a bank… built on the same stolen dirt. It’s like a guy screaming ‘Down with the system!’ while refreshing his stock portfolio.
The Irish version goes, ‘Ah yeah, terrible business altogether, the empire and all that… now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll head back to me semi-detached on previously confiscated farmland and argue about it over a pint.’
The Aussie version? ‘Mate, this whole place was nicked—absolutely cooked—but I’ll still fight ya over property prices in Sydney like it’s sacred ground.’
See, people don’t actually want justice—they want credit. They want to be the one holding the moral receipt. ‘Look at me! I acknowledge the theft!’ Yeah? Great. You gonna give the house back or just post about it?
Everybody’s outraged, nobody’s relocating. Turns out moral high ground is the only land nobody’s willing to give up.
I think you’re trying to make the Irish analogous to Jews/Israelis as a historically oppressed people reclaiming a homeland. But on the question of land confiscation, settlement, and imperial power, the analogy points much more naturally toward Palestinians. Irish land was taken by settlers and landlords under the weight of the British Empire, outside the control of the native population. That is why many Irish people instinctively recognise the Palestinian position. The major difference is that Ireland eventually recovered most of its sovereignty and dismantled the landlord system; Palestinians are still living with the unresolved consequences of dispossession. And since you’re so quick to lecture others about antisemitism, maybe don’t make your argument by leaning on lazy ethnic caricatures of Irish people and Australians.
Jews have ancient historical roots in that land too. Not Twitter roots—millennia roots. The name “Judea” didn’t come from a marketing agency.
But nuance? Oh no, we don’t do nuance.
Nuance doesn’t trend.
And here’s the real kicker—these same people act like the Middle East was some peaceful utopia until Israel showed up. Yeah, because nothing says “stable region” like centuries of Sunni vs Shia conflict, civil wars, sectarian violence, coups, monarchies, dictatorships, and proxy wars.
But no—wipe all that away. Simplify it. Clean it up. Make it emotionally satisfying.
Because outrage is easier when you only need one villain.
And let me tell you something else—when you start saying things like “all Israelis are evil” or “all Jews are responsible,” congratulations… you didn’t solve anything. You just took a complicated geopolitical conflict and turned it into the same kind of collective blame garbage that’s been fueling human stupidity for centuries.
Different flag, same bad habit.
Bubbles still alive?
Glad I got my surf-adventure- travels back in the day, when there still was some adventure.
Before surfing got comodified, sterilized, exploited, internetized, WSLized, the list goes on.
Also a bit of fun, son. Haha. Don’t get your panties in a bunch.
So many pantie wearers!
What a load of garbage. Just what one would expect, when a halfwit attempts to pastiche his betters.
Maybe the one guy got it for trying to impersonate Mason Ho?
I believe both that Israel has the right to exist and defend itself while also assuming from the limited facts in the article that these guys probably deserved it from what I’ve personally seen with Israeli tourists.
JSC keeps saying that jews are easy to hate. Why?
What do they do that makes them easy to hate?
Also loving the fact that JSC’s entire justification for blowing up low key spots is to give the locals agency and sovereignty over their lands. Then when Israelis come and try to take control-as claimed in several of the comments shown by Derek – then JSC says the locals are nothing but ignorant, uneducated backwards fuckwits who don’t know what’s good for them.
Clown world.
I don’t know why JSC says that. He stands out as a weird dude on a website with a lot of weird dudes.
I like most of the jews I’ve met. But I’ve had bad experiences with young Israelis who are traveling fresh off their mandatory military service.
Judaism and Zionism are not one and the same
Exactly, but zionist cheerleaders can’t handle that distinction. They either deny it, or try to change the subject.
Because once you make that explicit distinction, all of a sudden it changes the narrative about who’s being singled out.
You know what Low Wide?
I’ve been waiting for people to question to motives of Israel for so long. They’ve hidden behind a religion and a copious racist angle and are due. I have nothing against Judaism, I distrust all religion equally.
No, not all Jews are Zionists – you know what they say, put three Jews together and two of them will start arguing about something!
Here’s a definition of Zionism, since many people use the word without having the slightest idea what it means –
“Zionism began a movement for the re-establishment of a Jewish homeland and nation-state in Judea and is now the development and protection of the State of Israel. It was established as a political organization in 1897 under Theodor Herzl, and was later led by Chaim Weizmann”
It’s what the third guy is doing that troubles me.
Zionism is Biblical , predicted by the prophets….so there’s a spiritual foundation from the Torah/Old testament…..it’s sad to see people have strong opinions of Israel /Jews , without understanding history and not just since Gaza happened Oct 7th…..
I think the so-called “prophecy” of the Jews returning to their ancient homeland, the Land of Israel is far less important than the modern concept of Zionism, in which Jews have every right to return to their ancient homeland.
As the Jewish people meet every definition of a people qualified to have a nation-state, the concept of Zionism says that they should have one in this area, a nation-state that should be recognized by all nations as the homeland of the Jewish people.
What’s wrong with that?
It’s not , so-called , its specific with a timeline, after 70ad and the total destruction of Jerusalem and killing about 1m Jews….Jews were scattered all over the world, with a promise that their would be a new homeland created with Jerusalem as it’s capital….so Israel was created in 1948, again…..as per the Bible/Torah……so Zionism is part of their prophetic spiritual grounding….I just realized ……or that I believe , that Zionism is real and part of a 10,000 year story which has/will result in the ,”end of days, Prophecy’s,”…rabbit hole coming up?
I am not a fan of “Biblical Prophecy” about anything, but yes – this is why many evangelical American Christians are supporters of the State of Israel, as they believe the rebirth of the State of Israel was foretold in the Christian Bible.
Political Zionism is much more realistic, stating that the Jews are indigenous to the area once known as Judea and have every right to form and manage a modern nation-state in this area with Jerusalem as its capital.
But you if you’re an eastern European convert from the middle ages you’re not returning to your homeland. After all Judaism is a religion.
Being Jewish is both an religion AND an ethnicity – many Jews share a common genetic, cultural, and historical heritage originating from the ancient Israelites, even if they do not practice the religion or have not lived in the Land of Israel for centuries.
So yes, ALL Jews who return to the Land of Israel are returning to their indigenous homeland!
Support Israel for your own racist reasons mate but don’t bullshit us with illogical nonsense.
Just the facts – why do you deny the common genetic, historical and cultural heritage of all Jewish people worldwide and their right to establish a nation-state in Judea, where Jewish people have been a continuous presence for more than 3 000 years?
Are you ignorant or just stupid?
where’s the genetic heritage if you are an eastern european convert???
My approach to Israel is pragmatic. It exits. It has millions of people living there.
The status quo needs to change to improve the lot of Gazans and Palestinians generally but I don’t know how you can give them exactly what they want without a lot of people dying.
John is rescuing cultures by exposing their surf venues….
who wooda thought that ordering a kosher meal at a local food establishment would cause such a fuss. apparently locals use heritage.com to pry into two dudes that don’t look jewish and plan an attack after watching ’em down some SanMiguel’s and or Red Horse and waiting for them to piss on the road. local surfers? there must be more to the story…? Maybe at Inertia?
Cheers Tim! Your comment brings back a memory. At 15 years old we could go into the Asian district of SD (Convoy st.) and buy exotic beer from the markets. Most of the workers were fresh off the boat and had no concept of US laws. Never got carded. I consumed many pints of Red Horse back then. Packs a punch.
crossing the border meant stopping at the taquiaria and buying warm tortillas and montequia (butter) then rushing to the liqoures to buy 10 oz corona ‘bullets’…by the cases. there was no concept of being gringos and 20 plus years later survived surf trips to both baja norte&sur and mainland. crossed the sea of cortez on the ferry and people were out-numbered by goats, chickens and locals wearing native wools and huarche sandals. heck, that’s how we dressed in the south bay.
btw, I was also 15 y/o at the first time…
Your cunt status went through the roof when you started kneeling in front of Monty. Very disappointed.
Surfline just dropped their history of Superbank. Enjoy.
Pause the video at 1:26 to see a cool photo from 1968. There’s also a photo from 1891
At 6:30 they show you the 3 outlets for the dispersal of the sand.
Yeah, it’s pretty good this thing.
I was suitably impressed.
I’m a sucka for well-researched content. Aren’t we all !
Not sure if you saw this one that I linked. You likely do, but nevertheless …
https://youtu.be/H-cO2Glf1G…
but very wrong in parts
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
This kid has a bright future in surf journalism, a previously untapped genre
Was there in 94, pretty basic accommodations.
Loved it.
From the pictures in the vid—looks like an exploited surf-ghetto now.
JSC = pimper’s paradise.
Haha fuck hey. Par for the course in this joint lately.
Xox
Ha ha! We appreciate the effort!