American communists
Looking for Commies.

American surfers spend nation’s 250th birthday trying to spot communists in the lineup

"There is now a ⁠resurgence of the communist menace in our land (and water)..."

Today in July 4th, the date that Americans both domestic and abroad celebrate throwing off English shackles and becoming a grand experiment. Surfers, of course, generally spend the holiday at the beach paddling out with low-expectations, as BBQ and fireworks are the star of the day, but paddling out, nonetheless, because surfers surf.

Now, typically holiday lineups, including those on July 4th, feature locals throwing friendly-ish nods to other locals over throngs of blow-ins. The blow-ins are also treated with some form of begrudging respect seeing that it is a holiday and, well, whatever, but this year surfers, especially locals, long-something very suspect about the explosion of “wave sharing” over the past years will be out paddling eagle-eyed, looking for something nefarious.

Namely, communists.

But which surfer hasn’t noticed a great uptick in “drop-ins” during the last five, or such, years. A real attitude of “what’s yours is mine,” wave resources being taken from deserving and given to the soft-tops etc. and it has been disturbing for some time but United States President Donald J. Trump identified the culprits in a stirring speech just last night.

This country has been invaded by pinkos.

Standing in front of Mt. Rushmore in one of the two Dakotas, Trump shared, “There is now a ⁠resurgence of the communist menace in our land, including from newcomers to our country who embrace ideas totally opposed to our way of life and our great success. We’re not going to let this ​happen.”

He later added, “We resolve and swear for all to hear that the citizens of the ​United States of America will vanquish communism quickly … We will send them quickly ​away, and we will continue to build our country bigger and better, stronger than ever before. America will never be a communist country!” 

Surfers nodding and ready to join the fight. But how to spot the commie? Does he surf with a hammer and sickle on board? Does she shout lines from the Communist Manifesto in the water? Do they simply re-appropriate waves and send the former shredders to some inland gulag called “Surf Ranch?”

Help.

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Travis Edgar

200 plus comments… don’t have the time, but did anyone drop…”Charlie don’t surf”?…

The Bitchy Crab

True that. I just got the ol violet after six years.

BograilCutback

Don’t mess with Dez!

Hippy

Erosion and effects to entry level surf spots

Sounds pretty Inertia

Do agree with Gwen that the Triple Crown is an obvious solution to this tour’s questions.

Assuming that the WSL wants credibility.

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

been saying that since ELO canned it.

Triple Crown solves many problems.

deeks

Yep agree and take the slavepool out of the equation

Strayan Cunt

Hey gang this seems like a perfect time for part 2 of my cathartic series “Americans I Love”. So I’ve always loved this band and always used to fucking pump this particular tune when I was about to head out and try and jag some big pits when in Fiji or Tahiti or wherever so it always brings back epic memories of big, perfect cones or absolute fucking floggings. Happy birthday my dear sep….. oops fuck sorry I mean American mates. Enjoy yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew

https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=b8-tXG8KrWs&list=RDb8-tXG8KrWs&start_radio=1&ra=m

Hippy

awesome cunt, constant reconciliation due to no social muffler

super impressed, so self aware, good on you

Strayan Cunt

Thank mate xx

BograilCutback

Is The Strokes also the name of one of Mindy’s specials?

Strayan Cunt

Everything Mindy does is special my dear American friend xx

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

I Hope Derek is OK, and look forward to his spilled beans

Crazy shit

The Bitchy Crab

Was thrilled to have a little run, man following on his phone giving cops a live commentary!

BograilCutback

Sports chub?

tim_nelsen

VTA Update: There’s bombs bursting in air, gives proof that Dane’s shack (and American flag) is still there. He’s a Patriot and Shawn Thomson is still an unwanted commie from Patagonia.

Barnycle

The GOAT is live commentating the Occy Grom contest with Vaughan.

Just GOAT things. Ignoring you’ll haters. Deadly squeezing secrets out of him. Sounds like he’ll be a ‘CT surfer again soon.

Kelly and Deadly are interviewing/chatting with Taylor Bartlett, whose father just passed away surfing recently, who just won his division. He’s off to Tavarua with his uncle next month.

Sofa Surfer

I just caught up here, and I think I’m clear where you guys fall with regard to being called cunts and seppos. How do you feel about chucklefuck? Or fucktard?

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Aussies need a new name, but they are both fucked

Try harder

Sofa Surfer

Alright, back to the drawing board…

Strayan Cunt

Oh dear mate sorry you had to read all that, disgusting as we all know there is a lady present. I think we have all decided that cunt is fine but seppo is derogatory, offensive and never to be used on here again. Any thoughts to share?

Sofa Surfer

Naw, I’m good. I was joking! I’m starting to think there’s something wrong with me because I’m not offended.

Strayan Cunt

Its because you are a solid human and the world is calling out for more like ya

Barnycle

They didn’t teach sarcasm in Strayan School 🙂

Strayan Cunt

No I got it and replied with equal sarcasm mate haha

@TheRealJackMeoff

That’s because you’re from the midwest…
https://youtube.com/shorts/wGz3SJe5d1w?si=aD4nlbXBmtN-ug3R

Sofa Surfer

hahahahahahaha! There’s a lot of truth here.

Blowin

Strangely enough it’s not actually intended to be offensive.

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Don’t you get it?

Seppos are CUNTS TOO

Strayan Cunt

Cunts is fine, seppo is fucking revolting and not to be used again on here

Capt Sensible

Yea your a real cunts cunt if you use the term seppo , but hey some cunts are never fuckin happy ..cunts.

Phil's Wart

Nothing makes more sense .

The Bitchy Crab

Not a carbon one!

The Bitchy Crab

In unrelated news, just chased a man of Middle Eastern appearance who was behaving erratically down Bondi Road as kids and mama’s huddled in corners etc. Didn’t get to test knife-proofedness of jiujitsu as cops came swooping in. Wild ol times.

Brutus

you did?

Damn Bondi/Southern beaches…sharks/jews/Jihad……and it’s 4 th july celebrations in USA….who could make this shit up?

The Bitchy Crab

It’s one big Grand Theft Auto mega-simulation!

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Good on you for being a player, and not a bystander.

Fuck

The Bitchy Crab

Gotta be in it to win it, as they say.

Barnycle

Glad that you’re safe, DR. Good on ya.

Hope that they interview you for the news so that we can see that big ol’ smile of yours 😉

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Agro was unavailable for an interview

But he was ready to “PUNCH ON”

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

The Bitchy Crab

The Australian newspaper got me live on the scene at the massacre. Gotta admit I wasn’t my preferred nothing-to-see-here Dez but was hottish mix of anger and sad.

Barnycle

Well, I never want to see that. Don’t want to ever see a frown after seeing the most beautiful smile in all of journalism. If someone can find me a more genuine smile I’ll give them a hundred freedom bucks.

For those who don’t know.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

The Bitchy Crab

Aw, me ol pal Gulpilil. Lord he missed.

BograilCutback

*Heart flutter*

Brutus

at last something real……..will we get a story of surfer disarming Jihad terrorist, and making Bondi great again…or….secret mossad agent takes out would be jihadist with bare hands???

The Bitchy Crab

Oh god, how I wish a Mossad man would’ve dropped from the sky. Anyone dive into season 5 of Fauda yet? The October 7 eps are crazy.

Blowin

Diversity is our strength!

Or something.

Good work for today. That’s what men are for. Showed yourself to be worthy.

Jack John Johnson

Satan?

@TheRealJackMeoff
Jack John Johnson

Who is the real Pato Banton.🤔

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Moderating in REAL LIFE

That is some heavy shit to deal with. Good on you

FUCK MAN

The Bitchy Crab

I don’t moderate online! Happens by magic it seems.

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

There are some helpers, and there are many watchers.

You are a helper.

If in trouble, always look for the helpers…

Not the stunted cunts

The Bitchy Crab

Send email if problem occurs! May read, may not.

The Bitchy Crab

And to clarify, he didn’t have a visible knife, something clutched real tight in his fist.

Strayan Cunt

Maybe a detonation device Dez?

deeks

Scratchy 5 dollar win

Strayan Cunt

Hahahahahahahaha

The Bitchy Crab

Hold onto that thing for dear life etc.

The Bitchy Crab

Exciting!

Jack John Johnson

World Cup 4th of July nationalist patriotism bullshit.
https://youtu.be/xHR-rzUjCzU?si=-QRj5Znf6Eo3iFdb

I am a Crayfish Popsicle
Jack John Johnson

America is a philosophy one can choose to follow or not.

Brutus

problem being which philosophy….??

Jack John Johnson

Mostly the greed one. Greed isn’t illegal and unfortunately transcends all race, religions, sex, and sorry…I just said sex and got distracted.

tim_nelsen

no more uninterrupted 45 minutes plays: flopping, hydro breaks, car commies, celebrities in stands, etc. oh, and replays…slow replays where everyone is the referee. now i know why i quit sports. to go surfing~it’s still a sport no? but just as crowded as an arena and/or stadium with no tickets needed yet?

Rich Marx

Independence Day

deeks

Fuck me. If you want your brain to shrink. Add the Bruce Willis one where they blow up the asteroid to really dumb down

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

WTF is wrong with you?

It was easier to train some fuckn random oil drillers to be Astros, than it was to train Astros to drill…

Blowin

True.

BograilCutback

Yes.

deeks

Hahaha. Should have been riggers an a pallet of piss. Would have fucked that asteroid good and claimed living away from home allowance

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Happy Birthday Big Brother.

Two of my favs from my childhood

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n9bxfxE25Y
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9t1IK_9apWs

c4

Let me guess, you’re an old washed up white supremacist living in a mobile home in Fallbrook?

Brutus

like me???

c4

Haha don’t think you’re an inbred racist from SoCal.

Brutus

damn, do you think there’s any hope for me…..as I coming to SoCal in Sept…what should I strive to do to be acceptable,LOL?

c4

There is still hope! Maybe be wear a metal militia shirt.

Brutus

I was thinking of a Proud Boys Jan 6 shirt?

c4

Siiiick that’ll work. You might even be offered a tour of the White House.

Brutus

now that would be great as I hear there’s a wavepool coming…where ya can into a greenroom….and also I can have a walz inthe new ballroom…..surfing/dancing wow WH here I come…and I hear ya get $’s for insurrection?

c4

I think you need to start working out the dims for Trumps first board asap.

Brutus

yeah but does he have a credit rating otherwise cash only??

c4

Maybe a date with one of his daughters or a Trump watch.

Brutus

I hear the made in USA Trump smart gold phone is a steal….his daughters apparently use only pools hence the new one being converted in WDC..

deeks

I think it’s a chick

Brutus

ha didn’t King Charlie kill his exwife,LOL?

Barnycle

Have you been drinking? You seem offended by some everyday BG shit and now you’re laughing out LOUD at the possibility that the woman who was possibly one of the most loved or respected on earth was murdered? Rein it in, mate. That shit is not funny.

Brutus

ah…..sensitive to the Royal family…..or possibility she was taken out…it’s all just conjecture , but just because she was loved by the public…..and as I am not a Royal follower…..it’s just conjecture …I take back my LOL……

c4

Seems like once the surfer mag forum got shut down the cockroaches scurried in all directions and some ended up here.

Strayan Cunt

Reading through this comment section it has been made clear to me that calling our dear American friends a seppo is now a racist hate crime and I want to offer my most sincere apologies for any offence caused.

I am not used to, or a fan of this politically correct era we now live in and hand on heart just treat you all as mates and just banter away with you all the same as I do with my mates down here. I was wrong and it will stop from now on and I will try and bring some depth and substance to future discussions down here. I am truly sorry everyone xx

Brutus

actions will tell the real story….nice to see you eating a bit of humble pie….July 4th’s dessert,LOL?

Strayan Cunt

No comment, I am too terrified it will gravely offend someone

Brutus

ah but fear not in testing the parameters….I think we are just trying to help you become a BG community member……..just calling out some of the language re women/gays/Jews…nationalistic chest thumping…like blowin….

Strayan Cunt

Brutus I always thought my take on humanity was pretty clear but I will make it crystal for ya.

All I want from fellow humans is for them to be good cunts, who want to live peacefully and do no harm to others. I give less than zero fucks if they are men or women, Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, black, brown, white, yellow, homosexual, straight, bi, trannies or whatever.

I also don’t want to live in a world where every cunt is so soft and offended we can no longer have open discussions and laughter for the fear of being called an ism. Deep down we all know what is acceptable and what isn’t and if harm by our words was intended.

Personally I think the Israeli government have been acting like a proper pack of cunts lately but that does not mean I am anti Jewish and to suggest so is fucking idiotic

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

I am offended. How DARE YOU! Nobody likes a record on repeat.

Yeah Nah, I guess you just gotta read the room on the day.

Some people are very sensitive, while others will let you put shit on their MUM while she is in the room, while you watch speechless.

There is a time and place for everything.

And ALL Shit has to go somewhere at the end of the day…

Never to be seen again and forgotten about.

FLUSH, but always keep the RESPECT

Brutus

I’m afraid that anyone’s take on humanity is always muddied but man’s behavior….in all facets of civilization…..what’s right and wrong varies from culture to culture , whereas in the spiritual world……Philosophy/religion, there’s another set of parameters being adhered to depending on your God or not!
So it’s really difficult to have a take/opinion on humanity without having knowledge of both sides of man’s humanity….very complicated…like Israel and Palestine …if you didn’t know the 5000 year + history….well uninformed opinion….nothing is as simple as it seems……so here we are trying to learn/evolve…well some of us are…and I think you will!

Strayan Cunt

You may very well be right brother but calling someone racist or anti Jewish because they hold a different opinion than your own is to me both foolish and harmful to society as a whole. I love and respect you sir and always grow from our convos xx

Brutus

when you have an opinion, hopefully you can back it up with facts or at least a philosophical/spiritual point of view.
So if and when you put forth an opinion…can you back it up?
I understand you surf up in the Northern Rivers area and a tradie, which is great but does not represent all of Australia , we are now cosmopolitan…

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Just don’t be such a cunt

Strayan Cunt

We are all fellow cunts brother, the only real question is what kind?

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

I posted 2 relevant vids ahahaha

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2GwrR-4Q9E

Brutus

insanely brilliant…..

Brutus

watch the vids popsicle posted will give you an idea…it’s rather ironic when you think we call people cunts , as derogative insult…..yet….we all love and lust after cunts….as for men and some women….cunts are a God to worship,LOL?

I am a Crayfish Popsicle
Brutus

Possibly one of the greatest speech’s ever given……everybody should watch and comment…dicks/pussies/arseholes……dukka dukka

Hippy

Greatest movie filmed

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Some people are claiming it is not real, and it is AI pr puppets.

Looked real to me

@TheRealJackMeoff

Not a hate crime.
This is a free society forum here, say what you want, and everyone is free to take it or leave it accordingly.
No need to make a big deal, either you get it or you don’t.

Strayan Cunt

No worries Jack, just rest assured you can still call me a roo rooting, koala bum hole fingering wog cunt and I will just laugh. Poms and Seppos are our biggest friends and allies and never once has a pom taken offence cuz they realise it is just a light hearted term of endearment. The world is turning soft as fuck

@TheRealJackMeoff

You just don’t get it, guess you never will.
I am not offended, I am just sick of it, you act like this shit is normal, it’s not.
Just low IQ ghetto mentality.
You can do better than this.
Or maybe not, like I said I am giving up on you, I’ll just leave you be.

Strayan Cunt

Jack you don’t get it either mate, this type of shit is in fact very normal down here. From a young age we give each other shit non stop so by the time we become adults very little offends us and we laugh at nearly everything. Its a great way to live

@TheRealJackMeoff

Yeah well I am not from there, I spent most of my adult life living in Hawaii, where that shit doesn’t fly.
This is an international forum, maybe try and realize we all don’t want to be like you.
Besides you are not really giving any one person shit, you are just spouting generalized shit to no one in general and talking shit on a whole country where shit is getting pretty real.
DR again going through real life consequences that start with that mindset.
It’s funny in that you call us seppos while being toxic as fuck, then cry and play coy when it gets to people or gets thrown back at you.
You got trolled for real by PP and were crying tears telling everyone he should be banned, but that is how we are right?
All in good fun right?
I too was having child like fun with it but you wanted the serious me, way better now?

@TheRealJackMeoff

I earned that nuclear badge for a reason, I keep it as a reminder to myself to chill out.
Blocking it out way better for me than engaging.

Strayan Cunt

Jack I don’t give a fuck what people want to call me or say to me, they can knock emselves out. With PP I was just pointing out he is a serial pest from our old site and to watch out for him

@TheRealJackMeoff

Yet again you don’t get it, I don’t want to be toxic, I want to converse with you like normal people do.
Little personal pokes are all in good fun but what you are doing is endless blanket shit talk.
Is this really that hard to understand?

Strayan Cunt

I love you Jack and you can talk to me about anything mate

Hughe Johnson

🤣

It comes from British and Australian rhyming slang. The phrase “septic tank” rhymes with “Yank”. In typical Aussie fashion, they shortened “septic tank” to “septic” and added an “o” to the end, resulting in “Seppo”.

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Yank rhymes with many words. I think you are forgetting the reasoning behind that particular choice… Hahaha

Strayan Cunt

I wonder if I should just start calling them Wanks instead hahahahaha

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

You are forgetting the main ingredient…

How about

Sunk Ball Tanks – Suckaas
Rank Fish Tanks – FishSticks

Hughe Johnson

Australians use the word “cunt” casually because the country’s unique linguistic culture has largely neutralized its taboo. While it can be a harsh insult, it is frequently used—depending on the context and tone—as an everyday descriptor, a stand-in for “mate,” or even an intense term of endearment.

Strayan Cunt

Exactly sir, just as my username illustrates

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Thankyou

How many traffic lights are in this picture?

Phil's Wart

Captain Obvious saves the day!

tim_nelsen

St Barb juicing up for a Steely Dan concert~ https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Phil's Wart

Thanks Captain Obvious!

deeks

Don’t care. What fins are you rockin ?

FlintyBadman

That’s not Trump, you fool!

Brutus

haha…..no-one has the 1# predator spot except trump…but Elo also has a past….

Capt Sensible

I have had the good fortune to have met quite a few North Americans in my time. In fact, one chap I have known for decades still lives on the same property in Pennsylvania that George Washington gifted to his great-great-etc. grandfather, who was one of GW’s surveyors.

Capt Sensible

They are real easy to spot in China.


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