"Death is always just a stone's throw away!"
Last Hawaiian winter, the carrot-topped king of Pipeline Jamie O’Brien, a forty-year-old man who looks like a hamburger on a griddle, was almost killed in a freak accident at the Waimea rivermouth.
Do you remember?
The famous Waimea River had become swollen like never before following wild rains and locals had opened it up to create the biggest rivermouth waves ever seen.
Jamie O’Brien tried to ride it only to be sucked out to sea and when he eventually returned he said he’d almost died.
“Gnarliest experience ever,” said Jamie O’Brien. “I got sucked into the vortex of all vortexes! I knew that it was going to be the biggest river wave ever ridden. It was sending me everywhere. I was like, ‘Don’t fall on this, Jamie. Don’t fall.’ I couldn’t control my board, and I honestly just fell right back. It’s like a 10 or 12 foot wave, and it sucked me back. Then there was another wave, and it was just as big, and I’m like, ‘oh my god. I’m gonna die. My leash is gonna break. I’m in a very bad spot.”
Despite the brush with mortality, not his first let’s add for who can forget the terrible day when Mr O’Brien was almost slaughtered on rocks at Waikiki, today we find our second-favourite vlogger using his GoPro to give his fans a taste of what it’s like to surf in the Pipe Masters.
And, more than surfing the heat, but what it’s like to be Jamie O’Brien, with all the fans, the endless requests for selfies and autographs and a man who looks like he never forgets to butter his muffins telling Jamie he’ll give him anything he wants and that he’s going to DM him about something or other.
In the heat, alongside Koa Rothman, Eli Olson and Makai McNamara, the viewer sees everything Jamie O’Brien sees. We take off into what might be a heat winner but the force of the blowback sends the 2004 Pipe Master tumbling.
We get caught inside, our breathing becomes laboured, we feel the turbulence of the most dangerous wave in the world.
Eventually, we survive only to be accosted by more surf fans and are soon forced to flee the beach to our modest home one hundred feet from the sand.