Rich Porta breaks down Kelly Slater's attempted air at the Hurley Pro…
Did I ever tell you about the time I became a WSL judge, if ever so briefly, at the US Open? And how, upon throwing open the door to the judges’ tower, I was greeted by naked pro surfers serving food while studs or “cockmongers” (a young pro chosen for his large penis) fondled each other in front of the judges, arousing them greatly?
Of course, the conspiracy shit that surrounds the WSL judges is as dumb as it is awesome to read. And, Rich Porta, the Australian head judge, is anything but secretive about how the game is called.
In this clip, Kelly talks through the air he nearly made at the Hurley Pro; Rich explains why it got such a shitty score.
Kelly is forensic, as usual, and admits to thinking, since he landed in an explosion of whitewater, maybe he’d be able to ride out of it and no one would know a thing. Occy did it back in the eighties at Huntington and won the contest.
“I felt like I screwed up a normal air reverse,” says Kelly. “I didn’t realise I was so detached from my board. My knees smashed into both rails ahead of the deck pad and perfectly on a plane…I got off my knees and onto my feet and I realised I was in the whitewater. (I thought) it might almost look like it was landed…”
Y’ain’t fooling Rich Porta.
“You’ve gotta remember this is the best 34 surfers in the world,” says Rich. “They have to complete these manoeuvres. If you do the most amazing aerial in the world, the most amazing aerial the world’s ever seen, and you land on your belly, it’s an incomplete manoeuvre. Everyone has to realise it’s an incomplete manoeuvre. It’s worth nothing. The surfers know all that. There’s no dissension among the athletes about that score.”
And if he’d landed clean?
“The score would’ve been no problem,” says Rich. “It would’ve been a ten.”
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
Anyone noticed Johanne Defay scored an 8.5 in round 2 heat 2 of the Cascais Womens Pro by doing one turn, going prone, paddling, standing up again and doing another turn? One wave? And Kelly gets a 4.17 when he lands on his knees and stands up? Check out the analyzer. Its a conspiracy?
Don’t see why people are hung up on the air either. The rest of the heat was where the real bad judging took place mick getting a high 7 for a couple shitty snaps. Kelly only getting a 5 or six for 2 decent round house cutties an a air reverse.
why didn’t they finish the comp last week when the surf was perfect? now it’s gonna end in poo-like conditions. greedy
I feel like this is a waste of time to reply, but I wanted to thank you for correcting my grammer. How silly of me, and I feel so very much remorse. Thank you again for that! To clarify my comment, I was implying that I thought it was silly for one, (you) to be (offended) by others taking issue with the score of said ride. Simply calling people stupid for their opinion (which differ from your own) is in itself stupid. Do you not see the irony in this discussion? I find it mildy amusing! 🍻cheers!!
*grammar, lol.
Man, how much better I feel again! I would hate to disappoint the *grammar Natzis with correct spelling and punctuation. I’m thrilled to give you guys something to obsess over.
*Nazi. I don’t want to play anymore.
Are u sure? I was curious as to how many times you would play?
So your offended by someone else being offended? For what it’s worth I thought it was pretty awesome but he (slates) didn’t land it clean thus negating the discussion all together.
Still doesn’t explain the intensity of incompleting the manuver and the three turns after!
Just listen to kelly comments. He explains
This whole thing is just more proof that Noa Deane knew what he was talking about. The current WCT format is horrible and needs to change.
Different waves indeed, but not different scenarios; a make is a make, and if you don’t make it you get zero – according to Porta.
he got a 4.17.
I smell damage control. Having said that Mr Porta is right, but I would have given a 6 for the spectacle
I would’ve given him a 5 or 6 just because the rest of the ride was deserving as such, BUT still needed like a 7.5+ to win the heat.
Maybe there should be an “X-factor/element of surprise” factor added into the scoring? But at the same time, you don’t want everyone landing sloppy tricks, so kind of a tough call.
Hush Richie, the internet does not want to hear such logic.
yes.
Shouldn’t the head judge role be like the prime minister in that you only get a limited term as head judge.
Mr porta seems a little comfortable with his position and power and seems to dine out on these type of things a little to much.
interesting….
Owen Wright scored 3.67 for an “incomplete” barrel ride at Teahupoo last year.
No reason, no context, just sayin’…