And other funny keyword searches that land you right here…
One of the fascinating parts of operating a website is watching the behaviour of your readers. Who are you? Where are you from? What are your personal kinks?
In the print game, no one knows, knew.
The closest I ever came to identifying who read the jams of whatever mag I was editing was via those surveys we stuck in the mags and from focus groups that’d cost 20 gees and yield nothing.
Readers in focus groups do this very human thing where they say what the think elevates ‘em in the eye of the other participants or sub-consciously say what they think you want to hear. And, besides, who knows what their true motivations and likes are?
The problem, as any student of human behaviour would explain, is that surveys are filled out by people who like filling out surveys or ‘cause they want to win whatever trinket you had as an incentive.
Readers in focus groups do this very human thing where they say what they think elevates ‘em in the eye of the other participants or sub-consciously say what they think you want to hear. And, besides, who knows what their true motivations and likes are?
Your electronic movements, however, are beautiful to watch.
For those unfamiliar with Google Analytics, it’s an application that tracks website traffic. More than that, it allows publishers to see how many readers are on the site, what country they’re from, the electronic device they’re accessing your site from, what story they’re reading, where they came from and where they go after you.
And, tellingly, what keyword searches got ‘em there.
It’s become a game between Chas Smith and me to send each other funny keyword searches as they come up, briefly, on the Google Analytics dashboard.
Like this. Is true? asked Chas. We laugh because it couldn’t be more absurd!
Who taps these words in? Man with Bear fetish?
This is a complex equation.
Is that you Peter Taras?
Drowning fantasies?
Healthy young man with beach-y fantasies?
Most of us.
Lovely Latinas!
Angry South African man?
A lover of nostalgia?
A Kolohe Andino fan! For life! (Maybe me!)
Reliable medical advice for advanced cancers?
Do the secret kinks of man make you laugh?
What keyword searches lurk in the recesses of your web history?
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
John John Florence seems like the next Westerly Windina.
So much media can be bogus. As a contributor for the eminent 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈 OutinPerth.com, we believe all of this stuff about John Florence’s knee is a cover story to blacklist her from coming out gay like so many celebrities are silenced, even to this day, “don’t ask don’t tell” (that John John Florence is gay).
Anything can be faked. Sorry but this is a bearding…as someone who has been in person close to John John Florence while all of this was happening “allegedly” we witnessed NO injury as a well meaning, truth oriented, investigative reporter.
As far as our network is concerned, “View From a Blue Moon” IS a gay reference to one’s bootie…
John Florence surfs like a leopard in honor of muse #Vela.
This is from Camp Friends of Florence:
#JohnFlorenceLeopard .
Like JJF’s official IMDB page, many media outlets support John Florence as transgender – this widely distributed story refers to her as Cleopatra https://beachgrit.com/2021/… .
And at least one other legitimate news source is questioning this knee surgery as possibly bogus: https://stabmag.com/news/ex…
Finally, anyone who was at Margaret River in person like I was witnessing John John Florence’s final heat can tell you she paddled in and was totally fine – didn’t even need jet ski to bring her in. Check the footage.
Soon John John Florence will be coming out there crossdressing like Westerly Windina…since she is a transsexual. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
no real gay man would carry that facial hair. Then again, no straight man should either.
story of the year
Boys, we´ve got to admit: you have balls here at Beach Grit!
Can we talk about the fact that “big black penis ejaculation photos” conjured up the beachgrit homepage on a google search plz, thx.
Clearly you gentlemen have a way with SEO. Or Rory’s metaphors have really covered the spectrum.
Is Rory back yet?
Rory is in Nicaragua. In the last message I received from him, he apologised for missing his daily story and included the words “hoovering” “poisoning” and “sweating.” I believe Rory’ll be online, again, soon…
click bait = nick bait
Is john john florence gay or just a fat man on a stand up paddle board who likes nude surfer women and cape town girl pigs while fat occy likes big ass Brazillians, not nude surfer women with candid teen suntan lines and lost bikinis. Don’t try a beachside sex fuck with pushing sandstone with a girl who cant hold her breath underwater and big black penis ejaculation photos, it will give you bone cancer and just look like a freaking target commercial.
Never a truer word has been spoken. Or something like that.
He’s gay for pussy.
Shit, that means I’m gay too. I didn’t know it was contagious!!!
Maybe you and JJF should meet then!
Oh, and I “accidentally” typed in organic goat’s milk bottle and Beach Grit came up…mahalos for that Chas.
The other lurid and salacious question: why is Beach Grit popping up in the search results for these, uh, “search words”???
I think it will an amazing step forward in the surfing community when JJF comes out.