Watch out world! Here comes trouble!
Want two days of getting sprayed by Slater in his pool? Who doesn't!

Just in: WSL buys Kelly Slater Pools!

For eight dollars and a bar of wax!

Did you see this coming? Was it always in the works? (Of course it was! If you visit BeachGrit you’ll remember we broke this very story 4 months ago!) The WSL announced today that it is buying the Kelly Slater Pools biz! Here is the entire press release. Commentary and analysis up next!

– WSL Holdings, the parent company of the World Surf League (WSL), today announced an agreement in principle to acquire a majority stake in the Kelly Slater Wave Company (KSWC). The partnership between the WSL and KSWC will be dedicated to promoting the growth of high-performance surfing around the world. KSWC’s revolutionary technology creates a number of possibilities for the future of the sport. The WSL and the KSWC envision the build-out of a global network of WSL-branded high-performance training centers utilizing this wave technology.

For Kelly Slater, the 11-time world champion, the creation of this wave technology is the realization of a lifelong dream and a 10-year project, and today’s announcement brings his two worlds together. “While surfing for me will always be about adventure, travel and the ocean, this wave brings a new opportunity to the sport without taking away the soulfulness that attracted many of us to surfing in first place,” said Slater. “Surfing great waves in a controlled environment adds a new dimension, as there is no hassling for waves, no stress over who got the best wave – they are all good. Everyone can relax, have fun and focus on improving their surfing.”

“It’s beyond my dreams that this wave will be a canvas for the global advancement of this great sport in partnership with the WSL,” he added. “It will democratize surfing and provide incredible training opportunities for athletes as well as aspirational surfers in areas with no ocean waves.”

The WSL sanctions and organizes the highest-level professional surfing competitions for men, women, big wave, longboarders and juniors.

“The WSL proudly represents the best in men’s and women’s competitive surfing globally, and the amazing man-made wave technology developed by Kelly Slater and his team is a revolutionary innovation that has the power to dramatically enhance every aspect of our sport,” said Paul Speaker, CEO of the WSL. “We share the same vision and passion for growing high-performance surfing, and are beyond excited to work together under one roof to bring the sport to levels and places never before possible.”

KSWC technology creates an opportunity for surfers to practice and develop ever-higher levels of performance in a repeating environment, with unprecedented opportunities for surrounding camera and sensor arrays providing immediate and perfectly accurate feedback on their progress. This is the first repeatable man-made wave that convincingly delivers the power and shape of ocean waves most sought after by accomplished surfers, including a hollow barrel allowing for long tube rides. While high-performance surfing is the core mission of both the WSL and the KSWC, the wave technology is flexible and can also create variable waves for beginner and intermediate surfers.

WSL Commissioner Kieren Perrow recently visited the first KSWC site, and said the wave surpassed his expectations. “Up until a few weeks ago, I had never ridden Kelly’s Wave, and when I did, I was blown away by the experience,” Perrow said. “It is incredible to see this wave in action – it has more energy and power than I expected and this technology holds a lot of potential for the future development of surfers just starting out and those already competing on our Championship Tour.”

While competition in a man-made environment will offer previously impossible opportunities such as the creation of surrounding spectator environments, as well as certainty of scheduling, WSL CEO Speaker emphasized that nothing could ever replace the magic and mystery of world-class competition in the ocean. “We do believe that all stakeholders – athletes, fans, broadcast and corporate partners – will be super energized by the advent of Championship Tour-level competition with man-made waves,” he said, “but the ocean will always be our home, and the great waves on our tour will always remain the backbone of our competitive schedule.”

Speaker added: “No firm plans have been made for the inclusion of a man-made wave-based competition. We will be evaluating all the possibilities in the coming months with the Commissioners’ Office and the WSL athletes.” WSL Holdings is the parent company of the World Surf League (WSL). The transaction is subject to the negotiation of mutually agreeable definitive documentation, among other customary conditions. Both WSL and KSWC will continue to operate independently as separate entities following the closing of a transaction. Financial details of the acquisition were not disclosed.


Parker: “Shit Show wrecks at the Wedge!”

Is anything more comedic?

Mike Lucas has been doing an admirable job documenting SoCal swells in the last year or so. Good stuff. Plenty of Wedge footage, snagged all that Seal Beach carnage a few months back. Puts together some clean little edits.

I’ve never been able to fathom the appeal of taking pictures of surfing. Moving or otherwise. Sitting on the beach all day, watching other people have fun. It’s crazy!

Not knocking it. They’re doing god’s work. Definitely ain’t for me.

My favorite thing about him is that he dumps his raw stuff on the web. The header clip is nice, but I really love the 18 minutes of unculled video he shot that day.

Really does a better job of capturing the vibe. Shit show collisions, hoot and hollers, the roar of the surf. The filmer chuckling when people eat shit. Puts you in the moment. Gets you there.

That’s the goal, right?

Mason Ho the Eddie
It don't matter if it's two or twenty feet! Little Mason at The Eddie. | Photo: WSL

Can anyone get enough of Mason Ho?

The latest instalment of License to Chill, Island Oscillation… 

More Mason Ho?

Yes, please!

Can anyone get enough of the kid?

Creative approach, barrel slayer. As much as I love seeing him in heats I really prefer his edits.

So surf stoked, plays the happy card real well. Nothing but butterflies and rainbows going on upstairs. I’m sure he’s deeper than that, but the public persona is great. Like a big loveable labrador retriever.

What’s the name of that NS hell wave he loves so much? Right between Logs and Rockpiles. So fucking shallow. I’d call it unsurfable if I hadn’t seen so many killer clips.

Random fact: I went to elementary school with ...Lost filmer Joe Alani. He was in my younger brother Cody’s class.

Other random fact: Rory Pringle’s first name is short for Riordan. Mine isn’t. Just plain ol’ Rory.

Johnny Boy Gomes once threatened to kill me. He was working as a private surf guide for some Japanese tourist and the longboard he middle-manned for his client was taking too long. When he came back a few days later he picked up the freshly polished board and accidentally smashed the nose into an overhead pipe. Then demanded we fix it for free.

I don’t really miss Oahu.

Kauai’s better in nearly every way. But you just can’t beat the awesome reality of living on the Seven Mile Miracle when there’s swell in the water.


Fantasy: You can’t script this!

Did Rio throw a wrench into your game too?

We are almost to the halfway mark of the Men’s Samsung Galaxy Championship Tour brought to you by Jeep 2016 and how is your fantasy team faring? Are you riding a wave of unprecedented success that buoys each day or is your collection of professional surfers dragging you to the ocean’s floor like a millstone?

This is the first year I’ve actually participated and let me tell say, I thought I was learning the game. I started poorly at Snapper but had found my footing by Margies. I thought, “Yeah. I know these surfers. I know their foibles and their peculiarities. Time for Charles David Smith to put the pedal to the metal.”

But Rio absolutely smashed me. Destroyed not only my standing but my confidence. I had done what I thought you were supposed to do, pepper the lineup with a few extra Brazilians. They all lost. Everyone lost but Jack Freestone and John John Florence neither who were on my team.

I did so poorly, in fact, that I am throwing some of the blame upon the World Surf League. I know their motto is “You Can’t Script This.” But, really, Brazil seems like such an outlier, such a total crapshoot, that, in fairness, it is time to take it off of the schedule.

If you are a baseball fan you’ll recall when the Colorado Rockies entered Major League Baseball. The team built its park in Denver, a mile above sea level, and do you know what happened to the ball there? It flew! It flew through that thin air producing home run after home run after home run. A strange anomaly that was enjoyable at first but then tainted the game with weirdly inflated stats and bizarre games.

MLB has tried to fix it by making the outfield bigger etc. and it has worked, somewhat, but it would be better for everyone if the Colorado Rockies just went away.

Like Rio. It is out outlier. A strange burp that surfers don’t want to participate in and fans don’t want to watch. Its results aren’t reflective of the rest of the season and even though the WSL preaches unpredictability and chaos theory etc. etc. it is time to admit the mistake and relegate that event back to the Men’s Kyocera DuraForce GoPhone Qualifying Series brought to you by Peter Tosh’s used Kia Superstore: Kingston, Jamaica.

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Collin Harrington
There's river trash tearing up the brown water and there's dazzling wake superheroes like Collin Harrington! | Photo: Collin Harrington

Parker: Wakeboarding with river trash!

Teen single moms pounding warm booze and fist-fighting their own silicon-tit moms!

Wakesurfing looks real fun. But I’ve never tried it. Always lived near the coast. No point in dropping gas money to ride a tiny, if perfect, wave on some disgusting freshwater body.

Used to be a passably decent wakeboarder. That’s fun too. Stopped going when I hit the age people began expecting me to kick in on the aforementioned gas up. Too tough on the knees anyway.

Last time I went was a little over a decade ago. Ran into a buddy who’d just finished fireman school, immediately rushed out and financed a really nice boat. He was headed to the river, I could come along.

Why not? I spent a lot of time during my little boy Summers running around a Colorado River resort where my grandparents own a vacation home. One of those really nice double wide trailer deals. Full on garbage luxury. Many fond memories of stealing beers and fumbling a few knuckles into my fellow unattended teens once the sun went down and the adults were stumbling around semi-conscious.

It was a classy affair. Mainly moneyed SoCal heads who wanted a cheaply maintained weekend getaway. Kind of figured that was the average reality.

River trash are crazy people. Sun scorched nineteen-year-old single moms pounding warm booze then fist fighting their own be-thonged silicone tit mothers. Redneck goons chugging cheap beer and hauling ass through crowded waters. Jet skis smashing into everything. Absolutely fucking terrifying.

Headed into Needles, Arizona on a holiday weekend towing a brand new boat, realized I was dead wrong. River trash are crazy people. Sun-scorched nineteen-year-old single moms pounding warm booze then fist fighting their own be-thonged silicone tit mothers. Redneck goons chugging cheap beer and hauling ass through crowded waters. Jet skis smashing into everything. Absolutely fucking terrifying.

Homeboy thought his new boat would be a real pussy magnet. Which it was. All the gravel-voiced young ladies with premature crow’s feet and bad dye jobs wanted in. Not my scene. I’ve always liked ’em trashy, but you’ve gotta draw a line somewhere.

Three days of white knuckle terror. Captain always hammered. Convinced we were gonna bash into a levy at any moment. Saw a ton of tits, but nothing to write home about. Abandoned a guy at the second worst strip club I’ve ever been to because he was convinced one of the sex workers was into him.

Three days of white knuckle terror. Captain always hammered. Convinced we were gonna bash into a levy at any moment. Saw a ton of tits, but nothing to write home about. Abandoned a guy at the second worst strip club I’ve ever been to because he was convinced one of the sex workers was into him.

Might’ve been true, if he’d had a ton of blow. Which he did not.

Don’t know how he got back to our place. He didn’t remember either.

One of those trips that was miserable at the time, but is pretty funny in retrospect. Swore I’d never go again. Starting to reevaluate that oath.

Video of gorgeous jiggle tits sliding behind a boat helps. And I suspect that all those ladies who looked so nasty in my twenties might look quite a bit better now that I’m creeping toward middle age.