The Billabong Pro in Teahupo'o, Tahiti starts in two days and there are no waves in sight! Filipe Toledo dances for joy!
And Teahupo’o is mere days away with a swell forecast so little that not even the ebullient World Surf League can spin as anything other than “not massive.” Ross Williams went so far as to describe it as “smaller.”
And do you know who must be jumping up and down in pure joyful ecstasy? The bravest little coward, Filipe Toledo!
The young Brazilian started the year fabulously with a third place finish at Snapper but then fell on hard times with two injuries. Still, he is right in the hunt, currently number 13 in the world and if we drop his injuries and add juggle then he is number 5 in the world and if he wins in knee high Teahupo’o he could be 1st!
Number 1!
And do you remember last year when he refused to catch a wave thus earning a world-record 0 point heat total? There was some debate as to why he didn’t paddle into a wave. Maybe hurt? Maybe scared?
I would have been scared! But that is why I’m number 1980008787 in the world!
Will you hungrily chew up the business after such a long layoff or will you let it pass and gear up for Trestles instead? Are you excited the “show” is back or did you forget that professional surfers competed against each other in organized events?
I sort of forgot!
wow, you broke little white supremacist cunts must be starving over there at beach grit. just wow.
Very low quality article, with the usual illogicalness. The year Toledo did not catch a watch, the surf was very bad; long lulls with one or two small ‘sets’. Toledo, fearless at The Box; nicely exercised priority on Kai Otton at Pipe. My favourite verse in the Christian Bible is all liars will end up in the pit of sulfur (and, lol, I am not even a believer like those brainwashed Judeo-Xtians).
Last week I dreamed you and I met at a random cafe, Chas. You looked just like my estranged step-uncle. You had on a light blue oxford shirt, were very tan, wore a short and messy beard, and were much wider of face than you appear in photos. I don’t remember our conversation, but I believe it was a low-simmering argument, with both of us smiling constantly.
The WSL just fucking lose all momentum – I actually had to check who had won j Bay. I honestly could not remember that Fanning won – it was that underwhelming.
There lies the whole problem – Paul Speaker is too busy choosing the rose colour for his bed than actually entertaining and informing us. But they honestly think they have an incredible package – it is actually pretty much total shit!!!
May as well just watch the bullshit at the Olympics because at least some of it is entertaining.
Free Ryan Lochte!
Ha ha, Yes and yes is he going to jail for making up a gunpoint situation robbery story??
Maybe he could replace Speaker as CEO and chief of marketing.
“Just in Surfers robbed at gunpoint at Chopes – nah just kidding”
Another drink or two and Lochte would’ve said it was Phelps who pulled the gun.
Haha then watch Phelps rot in jail and then try to beat his all time record!!!!! hmmm could be motive
hahaha
Three of the four dumb bimbos were taken by the police when trying to leave Brazil !!!! Caught at the airport, two of them, taken from inside the plane.
The other, the loser Lochte, escaped before, and let these poor suckers behind!
Come on… just one night in the jail with the real bad guys, judge!!!
Hey Ryan … see the party that you will lose !!!
http://www.brasilpost.com.b…
just saw more of story – tools
It’s unofficial, but from a reliable source
The history is surfacing now with videos of the arrival of those blokes at home of the US delegation … full of watches, drunk, documents, and whole … they were not injured, sodomized and neither had their sissy penis castrated by traffickers and bad guys, or bad cops.
Ryan was at a party, France house, and goes cocconuts off, found a Brazilian girl, the world’s best (of course!), while his girlfriend / fiancee, was in home of the US delegation …
He planned and made the plot to not look bad and had problems with his girlfriend …
The case is being discovered, but are trying to stifle … but the police, and others, are slowly discovering the truth.
The problem is that the case has the potential to become a diplomatic case, because of the lies and entrance of the FBI.
yeah being from Oz don’t care too much, but story is slowly coming out here too
Honestly are you all fucken kidding me. Mild moral outrage over Olympic swimmers cutting loose in Rio de Janeiro! We are members of the surfing community remember. Travelling surfers have got up to stuff in Rio that would have turned Ryan Lochte’s hair white for real.
True mate but Lochte’s a tool, trying to get his 30secs of fame post a pool career, by a bullshit story. Otherwise couldn’t give a fuck
False accusations that impact Rio as a tourist destination are not to be sneezed at. Either way, I think I am more upset about the 30 seconds of his ‘reality’ show my eyeballs and ears suffered. Hang him high…
stiflers, brah
Thanks Bitter! Hehehe
Free Cocaine!
What a little gaylord.
Brazilian lives matter!
Nice one Chas. Plumbing new depths of cuntishness. Good to see.
“The bravest little coward”… LOL! I predict some butthurt Brazzo commentary to be forthcoming. Avoid Filipe for the short term Chas; he may try to hit you with his purse.
I though that you were 8675309th in the world, Jenny?