Did you get your MMA fill last night with Conner vs. Nate? No? Good! Let's get ready for an international rumble!
Do you like mixed martial arts? Does the sight of blood streaming down a cauliflower ear’d man send you into fits of ecstasy? Did you watch Conner McGregor vs. Nate Diaz last night? I didn’t but read that it is already being considered one of the greatest fights of all time. Do you want to know another good fight though? California’s west vs. Australia’s east. Gentlemen tap gloves.
Every coastal nation has a best coast, north, south, east or west. One coast trumps the other. In France, the west coast is better than the south Mediterranean coast. In Panama the east Caribbean coast is better than the west Pacific. In the United States’ California west is better than the urbane Eastern Seaboard. And in Australia the urbane east coast is better than its wild wild west. But when California is pitted against Australia’s Gold, Sunshine, Sydney coast which wins? Which is best of all?
Australia’s east coast features one very fine town and that town is Sydney. Some will say Byron Bay or Nambucca Heads or Forster (pronounced “Foster”) are equally fine but they are wrong. And Sydney is dreamy. There is shopping, dining, delicious models and surf. Australia’s east coast also features the Gold Coast and while Surfers Paradise is both a grammatical and architectural travesty the surf is amazing. There are waves for every desire.
California features three very fine towns, Los Angeles and San Francisco and San Diego. Los Angeles may be perfect. It has everything including the film industry and all the actresses who come for it. Everything except good surf but good surf is easily accessible via automobile. San Francisco is called the Paris of the west and it, too, has everything except attractive women and sunlight. San Diego has everything except an IQ.
Australia’s east coast has Snapper Rocks. California has Trestles. Australia’s east coast has Nicole Kidman. California has her too.
Australia’s east coast has beer. California has wine country. Australia’s east coast has Splendour in the Grass. California has Coachella. Australia’s east coast has that harsh, unfiltered east coast light. The sort that makes a man feel bad about his past and not dreamy. The same sort as New York City. California has golden light filtered in that way that all light is filtered on west coasts. The past is forgotten. Only the future exists.
And, therefore, California is better than Australia’s east coast. California might be better than anywhere else on earth.
^ The definition of a cunning linguist.
You mean it’s not mostly about North County? Since when does pretense double for intelligence?
I kinda agree that generally, the level of surfing is higher in AU but that isn’t necessarily a good thing, i.e., too many wave hogs not Bueno. Both are awesome but it’s hard to beat the consistency and variety of so cal. And way more surfers in AU.
Tell the peanut gallery more please – a tips and traps of how to munch carpet?
Hahaha – laughing into flu coughing fit
Things are good. Just a small wiener.
Australia’s East Coast has far less Californians… easy winner.
You’re tripping! West coast Oz (south west) is way better than both those areas. We got the west coast golden light sun, one of the best wine regions on earth (with great brewerys in between), we got models (i.e Taj’s missus), we got powerful waves (i.e not that limp-lipped snapper and trestles, the kind of waves that sort the men from the hipsters), we got Perth (the 7th most livable city on earth – ranked a shitload higher than crime ridden California) and we also have some of the best weed around! You need to get out more Chas.
But is it like Peru? (Just desert?). Or is there some green too?
Haha don’t you guys have google maps?? There is no desert here at all. It is lush green forest. Beautiful country-side and rivers etc. More like Portugal.
Wow; cool, I’ve been Sydney to Noosa, but will make sure to spend more than a month in AU next time we go.
In Hawaii, we barely have public schools; most people here haven’t been to other islands let alone different countries. But lush and green sounds great; Peru desert (no green) got the best of me.
There is a fuckload of nothing. Not like Peru desert tho, although my memory of Peruvian desert is a little wonky from San Pedro Cactus!
You’re thinking of north west oz not south west oz. Totally different climate. No desert in SW.
Spot on Captain
Except about Perth. It’s a cemetery
Tragically, everywhere really good is in between.
You just had to get yourself in there didn’t ya you kook. Nobody’s even talking about your (recently adopted?) island of Kauai. We know it’s nice. Thanks for the added advertisement.
I’m from Hawaii and I’ve lived on most major islands yet I constantly dream about California and AU; they’re both amazing places that are way more varied than any Hawaii island.
Oh. Ok. One time my friend Keanu came to school in a nice new pair of Nike shoes. I said “Wow, nice Nikes!” He replied “Thanks, but these are Pumas.”
Cool story bro.
You’re the only one thats mentioned Kauai in this thread…
It’s always Kauai
Let’s just say it again for effect.
Kauai.
Nah.
AGREE 100% , Cal gets 20+ sec swells , anything under 12 secs is not a swell , and the East coast lives on a diet of 10 sec swells , no really big swells , its a wannabe haven!
ever heard of a continental shelf?
ever heard of deep lows 1000’s of K’s away , west coast USA blows east coast Australia , continental shelf and all!!
maybe north of Point Concepcion.
10 second tradewind swells on a shallow Pointbreak bank will give tons and tons of tube time and far better shortboard surf than a funboard wave like Trestles no matter how many seconds are in the period or where the swell is generated.
hell of lot of big barreling points below point conception , lots of tube time ,and yeah trestles is just a very rippable wave , but if you know the swell direction and tides , there are still some very fine waves in SoCal .
the east Coast is like a “claytons” for the real swell dwellers!
I don’t know brah, I’ve surfers all over all the Hawaiian islands, and California, and some of the best waves of my life were in Eastern AU. I think the premise of the article is wrong; one is not better than the other; they’re both sick when you have the right equipment, conditions, and skill.
I think the point is , that if you had a choice of where you would spend the rest of your surfing life , Cal has the variety , humungous to fun points and beachies….
Cal would be the last place.
There’s a reason Greenough fled the place for here 40 years ago.
I’m sure Rory Parker took flight for very good reasons too.
ahh , the old greenough/rory story . You are right !
Byron bay is our epicenter on the East Coast , I think rory HAd to leave!
I can’t believe you cunts are taking this thread seriously
this is serious shit , west vs east , has been a battle since man worked out there was an east and west …..damn west is always best!!
After much thought, and discussion with my lady, I agree, Cali is better: my gf pointed out that while in AU, I said “AU is pretty sick but it doesn’t compare to Cali,” which is true. I concede.
There’s the south west to consider if you want heavier water. West Oz women are the worst tho. Princess syndrome hit us hard over here.
Yeah west coast oz is better than all these other places. I just imported my chick from Singapore, Eurasian goddess haha
Best part is the isolation. People put it in the too hard basket, which suits us just fucking fine! I also have an import haha
I moved out of Sydney because of the crowds in the surf and the traffic.
Basically moving North it is totally shit – oh no I cannot afford to move back now!!! I think everyone should move to California for the waves , for the weather, for the beer, for rubbing shoulders with the stars, Paul Speaker is there, oh that golden golden light!!!
The candidate immediately went downstairs to the basement room. A voice from within commanded him to enter, and on complying he found himself facing a spotlight strong enough to blind him for a moment. The room was otherwise dark. Behind the spotlight sat a scarcely discernible board of inquisitors…. The interrogator gruffly ordered the candidate to sit down. When he did so, he discovered that the chair in which he sat was so arranged that the full strength of the beam was focused directly on his face….
At first the questions were asked in a quiet, sympathetic, conciliatory manner, to invite confidence…. After a few minutes, however, the examiner worked up to a crescendo in a dramatic fashion…. When an inconsistency appeared, he raised his voice and lashed out at the candidate, often with sharp sarcasm. He might even roar, “You’re a liar.”
I can’t wait to see BeachGrit branded “San Diego: Everything but an IQ” t-shirts at the airport! Even if it’s Reno’s airport!
how did I miss this? when did they brand this brilliant caption?
See above article! Chas’s finest sentence ever written!
California also kills anywhere in Aus in terms of beer. I grew up on the Gold Coast and now live in California, but I cannot wait for the day I move back. While I love nearly everything about living here, I’d give it up for the surf and weather at home, even with the crowds.
fuck mate I can go get a sixer of Sierra Nevada pale ale down the Lennox Bottle-O.
free trade hasn’t been all bad for the working man.
Sierra is good, but it’s basically bottom of the barrel here and any of the stuff that makes it to oz is already old, plus you’re probably paying a kings ransom. When I’m home I drink Stone & Wood. I’m looking forward to trying Balter, but I heard it’s basically the same as Stone & Wood.
Stone and Wood Pacific Ale is a nice drop.
4 Pines Kolsch is good if you want something more classically german and not so Craft beer, if you know what I mean.
California also has the best weed and it’s pretty much legal. Not that the goofies and lames from the inertia would know anything about that. Do we lose points because the inertia office is in California?
Yes. All of our points unfortunately.