Are you looking to achieve that cock-jammed-down-your-throat look?
Things are happening. Amazing things. Magical things!
Maybe I’ll tell you about them later. Maybe I won’t. Maybe it’s more fun to let your imaginations wander.
Maybe I’m just brain fried from surfing a very fun left hand point all day. I really need to get a surf hat. Just say fuck it and pick up a chin-strap number. Or stop shaving my head so short. Leave a little hair for protection from those nasty ol’ UV rays.
Anyway… there’s a point here. Something I need to say before I forget. Before my mind shuts own for good.
We, surfers as a whole, have done a lot of stupid shit over the years. Banana boards. Short shorts. The US Open. Velcro booties/deck pad combos. Fu Wax. Board shorts over wetsuits. The Game.
I’ll bitch and moan. That’s what I do. Can’t help it.
But in the end I can ultimately accept that things just are the way they are.
But GoPro mouth mounts…
Three guys paddling around the line up. Looking like they’ve got cocks jammed down their throats.
I’ll be the first to say, “If that’s the look you’re going for you go shine right on you crazy fucking diamond!”
If it’s not, and I’ll bet that’s that case, you need to take a look a good hard look at the footage you’ve been generating. Is it good? Is it great? I’ll bet not.
Like amateur porn, the idea is a hell of a lot prettier than the reality. It may feel good. It does not look so.
Now pop that fucker in. Go stand in front of a mirror for twenty minutes. Film it. Watch it.
Are you happy with what you’ve become?
PS: Nate Diaz is going to murder Conor McGregor.