The World Title races tightens to an almost dead heat! Or does it?
What an exciting day of professional surfing! What thrills! And did you watch? Did you see World Number 2 Courtey Conlogue depose World Number 1 Tyler Wright in Portugal? Oh the timezone is a bit funky as it relates to the United States and Australia, even Brazil, so don’t abuse yourself too badly if you missed.
But wow!
Australian Tyler Wright was seen as having the whole show basically wrapped up but look at the rankings now. American Courtney Conlogue is a mere 5250 points behind. The amount received for a 5th place finish! Peanuts!
I was thinking super wow!
And then I spoke with a handsome gentleman who understands this game better than me and also makes math with ease. He told me that Tyler is way crazy ahead of Courtney when the things are dropped etc. and almost impossible to catch her. Courtney, he suggested, probably doesn’t even know how miserable her situation really is because the math are weird a tricky.
Should we let her feel like she is a mere 5250 points behind or should we spoil the fun?
Let’s let her feel!
Go Courtney Conlogue! Go and win!
(You basically can’t.)
Go and grab the World Title!
(Pretty much impossible.)
Go and wear the crown! 2016 Champion!
(Not going to happen.)
Shit. I’m not very good at this.
Based on dropping the two worst results, Courtney is 6,800 points behind. To make that up requires two 1st places vs Tyler’s two 3rd (semi final) places since there is a 3,500 point difference between 1st and 3rd (semi final). As the placings go further down, the points differential between placings becomes less. Therefore, if Courtney comes 2nd (finals) in each comp, Tyler must come 9th (round 4 knock-out) for Courtney to win. Its a big ask. Essentially Courtney needs to win. Courtney is probably not that ignorant yet obviously she won’t give up hope since anything is possible. Tyler can easily lose against Carissa, Steph, Sally, Lakey, Bianca, Johanne or even recall how in the zone Coco Ho was at Honolua last year when she surfed the perfect heat.
Don’t sweat the maths Nick, the Zionists have everything under control
WTF dude, #youcantscriptthis
If only she thanked the lord more, she’d be closer.
It’s been my dream for so long and now it’s so close, I can’t believe it
who needs to hear the actual interview 😀
I’m really proud of myself. I’ve worked really hard and it’s paying off
I want to thank my sponsors and my coach and my family for all of their support. I couldn’t have done it without them.
We miss anything?
Well you’d never say you couldn’t have done it. The core of this kind of speech is always “I did it! Me!! Me!!”
But maybe a sort of passive aggressive acknowledgement of your opponent, you know, like: “She really surfs well and I always know I have to be at my 100% to beat her.” (Meaning: congratulations on coming second, dickhead.)
Haha, yeah, nailed it. I crossed up my sports a bit — cycling people always thank their team and sponsors.
You can only control what you do, not what your opposition does
Just take it one heat at a time
That’s my favourite… oh and Throwing “super” in front of every second sentence.
I’m super stoked with the result. The conditions are super fun out there etc ….
Sprinkle in about ten “um yeah”s
And with that, I take #1 in the BG Fantasy Womens surf club.
I’d like to thank my sponsors Lost Energy Drinks, Salomon S-Core and Gotcha, whom i could not have achieved this without.
BitchGrit
Surely your learned friends mathematical contribution was the essential absence of this piece.
When I hear numbers my mind goes blank! I couldn’t remember!
I posted to help you since I enjoy helping (rather than murdering) people.