Question: Who is the ugliest world champ?

John John is knocking at the door of greatness! A perfect moment to pause and ask...

So I’m looking at John John Florence here, your Jeep Leaderboard Leader, and wondering who is the ugliest surf champ in history? Like ever? And I’m not saying it IS John John but I’m also not saying it IS NOT (because he’s not a world champion yet but also, when the sun is shining a particular way he is………..ok).

Right?

We’ve had Kelly forever and he is a certified male model. Andy Irons was as handsome as Adonis. Mick Fanning is Adolf Hitler’s dream man and Joel Parkinson is too (if he dyed his remaining hairs blonde).

Gabi Medina, no matter what your racist heart says, is traditionally handsome and Adriano de Souza, while pug-like, is… ummmmm… serviceable? The Little Plumber? Looks aren’t his high water mark but also not his total undoing.

C.J. Hobgood is an all-American.

Sunny Garcia may be most handsome ever (except for Kelly Slater).

Derek Ho is basically carved from granite.

Tom Carroll is two feel tall but good looking, as evidenced by his brother Nick.

Shaun Tomson even puts Kelly to shame.

Barton Lynch? Is he the last ugly world champ (besides kind of Adriano)?

Mark Richards? Yeah. He was a surf star but ugly.

But the ugliest? Let’s wait for this season to end!

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flashorton
flashorton
9 years ago

While you’re down there scraping, how about a follow up on the world champion ass on the women’s tour?

snapper
snapper
3 years ago
Reply to  flashorton

If one were to write on horniest women…..Jericho Popplar🤗

Jon Pyzel
Jon Pyzel
9 years ago

Slurping the very bottom of the trough for something to throw up online today.

merman
merman
9 years ago

Liam Hemsworth has been getting some private time up at Kelly’s wavepool, lets keep those fingers crossed for the most handsome world champ yet!

graham muschachos
graham muschachos
9 years ago

Are we talking mens only? Pauline Menczer was downright hideous! Id rather pump MR

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
9 years ago

JJF is not only ugly, but also dumber than dirt. He should get bonus points for just making it through the day.

sonny p
sonny p
9 years ago

you guys have stooped to a new low. this is a pretty disgusting article chas. seriously, writing an article about individuals ugliness? you have entered into trump territory.

Tostiloco
Tostiloco
9 years ago
Reply to  sonny p

So that makes it a win-win for the Grit.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  sonny p

So you’re saying that half of America, and particularly the deplorable half, thinks Chas is fit to be president?

sonny p
sonny p
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

chas as pres ? now your talking !!!

Justin Illusion
Justin Illusion
9 years ago

Too funny

Professor Ski Lodge
Professor Ski Lodge
9 years ago

Men, Damien Hardman. Women, Pauline Menczer.
Ugliest personalities – Men, Sunny Garcia, Women Layne Beachley.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
9 years ago

You gotta be nice to Layne cos she got raped by her biological mother or some shit.

Prada
Prada
9 years ago

This is gold.

A$AP Honky
A$AP Honky
9 years ago

damien hardman, he ugly. adrino he surf ugly.

samwaters
samwaters
9 years ago

Hey Chas–why don’t you grow up? What kind of “ugly article” is this? What does this have to do with surfing? Beauty’s only skin deep–Yeah–yeah–yeah…..

Pam's life buoy
Pam's life buoy
9 years ago

Well Beachgrit, I wasn’t expecting this

Cap'n Crunch
Cap'n Crunch
9 years ago

Are you kidding? It was a long time coming.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

More importantly which world champ had the ugliest personality?

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
9 years ago

I’d go with Sunny.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
9 years ago
Reply to  Trogan Fan

Honest question: any other world champs been to prison?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

There was that great episode in Rabbit’s book where he is arrested in Japan and absconds from prison, a good book and well worth a read. MP wasn’t technically a world champ, but he was really the de facto world champ there for awhile wasn’t he – didn’t he get involved in a multiple car cop chase and spend a few nights in jail. Dora (never the de facto world champ) also spent a year or so in jail for credit card fraud!

Nick Dee
Nick Dee
9 years ago

Martin Potter, definitely, is the most ugly with that chin the dreadlocks could not hide (although his mate Barton Lynch comes a very close 2nd). Shaun, the most handsome Jew ever; probably more handsome than Jesus & could definitely walk on water.

B-rad Gluckman
B-rad Gluckman
9 years ago
B-rad Gluckman
B-rad Gluckman
9 years ago
Reply to  B-rad Gluckman

Supporting evidence https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Pam's life buoy
Pam's life buoy
9 years ago
Reply to  B-rad Gluckman

Not sure it’s relevant to go down that road, Taylor Jensen, the best longboarder on the planet is tall and handsome as a viking straight out of scandinavia, plus he got Nat Young’s daughter laid! Man you high?

B-rad Gluckman
B-rad Gluckman
9 years ago

It’s not about his looks. He’s clearly a good looking dude. High Performance Longboarding though is HORRENDOUS. He’s doing an air on a 9ft plus board. The definition of ugly.

(I get stoked on longboarding but if you wanna ‘shred’ ride your shortboard for the session)

Caroline Marks Eyedrows
Caroline Marks Eyedrows
9 years ago

Adriano and his overbite

Wilko's Beer Bong
Wilko's Beer Bong
9 years ago

Gabby and his underbite.

Student8888
Student8888
9 years ago

Adriano has an underbite. AI had a serious overbite.


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