Mitch Coleborn
Industry insider says rumours are hot re: mass sackings of surf team. Only a couple of marquee surfers to remain. Does this mean Australian Mitch Coleborn, pictured, will be spared? And maybe Hawaiian Dusty Payne too?

Rumour: Volcom Slashes Surf Team!

More companies to follow with mass sackings! It's the surf industry apocalypse!

Who knew that October 2016 would be the end of the surf industry? The reaping? The inquisition? The end?

It’s a total apocalypse, baby!

Rumors are flowing fast and furious about brands taking the guillotine to their entire rosters! Surfers on 220,000 a year waking up and being on 000,000 a year.

It started, apparently, with Volcom chop chop chopping and then spread like a Reign of Terror across the industry. Three separate sources tell me every brand you know and love is included in the whispers (except Salty Crew).

Voices frayed. Hearts fluttering.

And oh! The horror! The end! The end of a nearly two decade run where young boys with just enough skill could earn six figure salaries and buy homes and lease Lexi.

But it’s over.

An official(ly rumored) wrap.

But are you sad? Will you go to bed broken-hearted for the local legend who lost his paying surf gig or do you say good riddance?

This being BeachGrit, home of the anti-depressive, I say ummmmm hoorah! Smart money men all say the time to jump into a market is when it flounders. Are you a young surfer with big sponsorship dreams? Keep them alive! Don’t fear the bear! Guess what Uncle Warren Buffett is investing in?

Trains!

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rm
rm
9 years ago

clothing companies are not the surf industry, they make up the apparel industry. So who cares? The real surf industry are shapers, glasser’s, sanders and foam manufacturers. I can’t really surf on shitty made clothes.

Kennypowersmullet
Kennypowersmullet
9 years ago

Who’s dark seas?

nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
9 years ago

who got cut?

Neal Kearney
Neal Kearney
9 years ago

Dark Seas is so hot right now

SharkAttack
SharkAttack
9 years ago

So, I see you like the design but the spelling is wrong — It is BitchGrit NOT BeachGrit
Get the rebrand right or suffer the same fate as the industry.
BitchGrit

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

The good thing about this is that there is a booming market in juggalo creepy clown business opportunities, at least here in mainland USA.

J H
J H
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

They should all head to Times Square and compete with the desnuda’s for the tourist business. That would truly be a shit show of epic proportions (and likely a sign of the apocalypse).

Shurley
Shurley
9 years ago

How to Make It in the Surf Industry
1) Don’t make or sell boards
2) Don’t sell to surfers
3) Don’t portray any modern values (Retro sells)
4) Employ a team who do not espouse sporting values (i.e hard-drinking, xanax-loving fly-boys)

sonny p
sonny p
9 years ago

Depactus anyone?

J H
J H
9 years ago
Reply to  sonny p

After their rumored demise in these very pages I checked yesterday and they still seem to be around. Or at least their website is.

Travis Bible
Travis Bible
9 years ago

I imagine (pro) surfers will have to get a bit more creative in cobbling together enough sponsors to make living the dream a reality. More sponsors throwing in smaller amounts, and maybe the pave the way for smaller companies to fill the void. That or the beer/liquor industry could step back into the limelight. Doug Coors owns the Nland park after all.

bitter guy
bitter guy
9 years ago
Reply to  Travis Bible

the Bud Tour would work just fine right now. PSAA, where you at?

Travis Bible
Travis Bible
9 years ago
Reply to  bitter guy

Gtown!

Anthony Arturo Leone
Anthony Arturo Leone
9 years ago
Reply to  Travis Bible

jeff myers has it locked down here on the banks, sponspored by a local rum distillery, local brewery, and now i believe a fancy rehydration drink company. I need to get my hangovers sponsored, im legit jealous. Anyone know an emerging coconut water company that needs a rep?

DorasChestRug
DorasChestRug
9 years ago

Q3 is always when the pencil pushers shit their pants about their bosses getting end of the year bonuses. And since their half baked marketing schemes didn’t pan out for a million different reasons – they become the antagonist of a slasher film

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  DorasChestRug

Less plot, more blood!

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

Might be a good thing if more pros get off the hpsb and experiment with alternative equipment, look at guys like Burch, Pacey and Rastovich, far more compelling than watchzing most of the top 34!

Badger
Badger
9 years ago

The main issue with surfing brands is that no one wears surfing brands. It’s like a shit oxymoron.

DrunkenAngel
DrunkenAngel
9 years ago
janeausten
janeausten
9 years ago
Reply to  DrunkenAngel

RIP Lux….on the podium with Iggy for best front?man ever.

Shurley
Shurley
9 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

only so much garbage you can put in your system. I do feel he could have been a claims coach for the WSL though.

janeausten
janeausten
9 years ago
Reply to  Shurley

He had that toughscary banchong thing that Noa Deane emulates, and never left the stage with a bit left in the tank. His cause of death was just one of those bad luck things (Aortic Dissection), though no doubt he lived large.

Wilko's Beer Bong
Wilko's Beer Bong
9 years ago

Swells dropped nicely for the brazzos

Tom
Tom
9 years ago

Noticed that – smaller and green light for go

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

Would be the most Kiwi surf team in the world. And only bested linguistically by Chas’ crush, Leo Fioravanti.

J H
J H
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

Ciao! Va bene! Arriverderci! Cosi, cosi!

wincy
wincy
9 years ago

What a lovely day!

Tom
Tom
9 years ago

Ok get ready for pay per view for events

Mapski
Mapski
9 years ago
Reply to  Tom

Fine if its at G-Land or a close facsimile. Consider it tithing.

Tom
Tom
9 years ago
Reply to  Mapski

If they can bring in more “thanks god for that” I’m in on tithing for sure. Maybe if they take the standard 10% from all the pros then the tour may survive

J H
J H
9 years ago
Reply to  Tom

If it mirrors the BWWT comp setup then I’m in. Pumping Cloudbreak, Chopes and Pipe are worth the money.

bitter guy
bitter guy
9 years ago

nah, there’s no market for photos, so no photo trips. you’re not getting paid to post shit on social media if you’re running less than maybe 100k followers, how many guys got that? Coffin bros will be fine though.

Jen See
Jen See
9 years ago
Reply to  bitter guy

The media landscape is all over the place at the moment. (Welp!) So yeah, selling even sponsored, hey here’s a cool boat trip, content isn’t easy. And if you’re doing a thing where the revenue model is based on sponsorship paired with media exposure, it’s going to be a super rough ride.

Tom
Tom
9 years ago

yeeaaah but Nah

javi rivera
javi rivera
9 years ago

These companies will probably get rid of the smaller players, the truly big stars will surely keep their job.


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