Beaches around Perth are being infected with rage! Yelling! Surf skis!
Oh of course you’ve been on the edge of your seat keeping up with the melee/fight/scuffle/kerfuffle in Huntington Beach, California. It is Riot City, USA! But if you live in Perth you shouldn’t be laughing too hard because you, dear Western Australian, are dealing with a surf rage epidemic (apparently).
And right when our boys are ready to head over to the nearby Drug Aware Pro. Could the timing be any worse? Should we read a little passage from Perth Now’s Sunday Times?
SURF rage is so out of control at one of Perth’s most popular beaches that board riders are calling for surf etiquette signs to be installed at popular breaks.
The Cottesloe Longboard Club has written to Cottesloe Council asking for “surfers’ code” signs — which explain the rules of the waves and encourage respect — to be erected at breaks including Isolated, The Cove and Dutch Inn.
(There’s a longboard club?)
Former club president Ken Hall said the surf breaks, all south of the Cottesloe Surf Life Saving Club, had experienced a huge surge in surfers of “varying capabilities” and riding diverse craft, including stand-up paddleboards and surf skis.
“The increase in the breaks’ use from all abilities and surf craft of the sport has seen some varied interpretations of the surfing rules resulting in physical injury, confrontation and verbal abuse,” Mr Hall said.
(Wait. What are surf skis? Are they…. jet skis? Or…. actual water skis that can be surfed on? How do you paddle? With a paddle? I’m sorry. I am going to have to press pause until I get some more information on surf skis. BRB)
(Ok. One Google later and I’m back. A “surf ski” is like an even deadlier version of a kayak. What would possess a man to take a surf ski into a lineup? Madness is right!)
He said the surfers’ code signs, which are used extensively at other surf beaches in WA and around Australia, clearly outline the rules of surfing to help reduce violent confrontations in the waves.
(Do you think, generally, this is true? That surf rage happens because people don’t know the rules or because people purposefully flaunt the rules? And, let’s be serious, if there is a beach with a longboard club, SUPs and surf skis what hope is there at all?)
Peter Dickson, a veteran Cottesloe surfer and editor of international surf travel magazine Longbreak, said fights were rare but tensions were always high at Cottesloe’s breaks.
“I wouldn’t take my son out there — it’s too crowded and too dangerous. There are people everywhere and the etiquette goes out the window,” he said.
“The surfers at the top of the food chain get all the waves and the poor beginners don’t get anything. What we really need are more artificial reefs to spread the crowd.”
(I thought artificial reefs were proven failures. Is there some new tech I’ve missed? Some barreling success?)
hippo SHOULD be burned by a SUP
What’s the West Oz definition of a “crowd?” Three people and a kangaroo on the beach?
I have to laugh on the webcast when they describe it as uncrowded. Where the fuck are they comparing it to?
snapper
Touche
Try looking up wave skis Chas. A ‘high performance’ version of the clubbie surf ski you have pictured. They were the scourge of many a soft walled point break, but don’t see too many around lately. Occasionally in the summer holidays someone will find one under a holiday house and cause an hour or two of merriment in our local beach break. On the other hand those clubbie skis are a great way to clear the line up in one fell/foul swoop.
Either way, if anyone brings one of these evil watercraft into your area; burn it forthwith.
I surfed a great beachie last week my way twice with a guy on a ski. He was actually ripping with paddle plant airs. We went wave for wave and shared the bank pretty well – he does ride boards as well ( but mainly ski) so happy enough. But you don’t see too many around that’s for sure. The mals out there were way worse!!!
Absolutely. The more time people spend in the ocean, the more they appreciate the value of sharing for the most part. It’s usually those who go to the beach once in a while who have the poor attitudes.
That Cottesloe feature in Longbreak years back totally blew the joint out of the water
Yet another Spot X blown by the print mags and their desperate search for eyeballs.
Let me help you out.
Rules to avoid fights in the surf:
1. don’t be an angry cunt. 2. take up macramé.
If you’re struggling with the first rule try these tips:
1. move somewhere with better surf.
2. Don’t join the longboard club.
3. Jesus or meth?
Angry people in a former penal (penile?) colony?
Whouda thunk it?
You wish you were Aussie mate your shits fucked.
I’ll slightly bastardize Mark Twain by saying that “the tales of my demise have been greatly exaggerated.” I’d be far more concerned about our friends in Western Europe. They’re about due for a barn burner one of these days.
as it turned out convicts made a better cuntry than religious puritans….whoulda thunk that?
the convicts had nothing to do with it. in fact, all was going swimmingly until they and their overlords turned up.
West Australian come from a long line of chancers, which remains a stronger streak than the convict one. The ‘Swan River Colony’ started out as a land speculation [“ie grab”]. The convicts came a bit later when the lack of Milk and Honey became apparent.