Help: I wanna be a pro surfer!

A "Choose your own Adventure" part IV!

Another day, another compelling decision to make! If you are new to this “choose your own adventure” catch up on parts one, two and three here! And without further ado…

Crowds do suck but the waves at 54th have that little end section and you have been working on consistently landing your air reverse. You really want to make the junior varsity surf team this year and feel you’ve got a great shot if you can just sort out the damned thing. You make almost half, which is great compared to most “normal” kids, but you don’t want to be most “normal” kids. You want to be a professional surfer and making the surf team will help, yeah? Brett Simpson surfed for his team and so did… so did… Kanoa Igarashi? Or wait. He was homeschooled. You know there’s another World Surf League pro who helped his school win state and you’re going down the list when your dad cuts in.

“54th huh? Your mom and I almost bought a house right on 54th before you were born but my practice was just getting started and so we bought up on the hill instead. I still kick myself though. We could have had a place for just 2 million. Can you believe it? Crazy!”

You’ve heard this story a few times before and can’t believe it. If you had been born on 54th…like right there…just think. You could have surfed whenever you wanted. Whenever! You would have made Kanoa Igarashi look like a flash in the pan! As soon as you get your Tesla all that will change but damn. Damn!

And your dad cuts in again. “Speaking of your mom…”

a) …You know Samantha? My new nurse? Well… I don’t know how this happened but we’re in love!”

b) …We are going to a couples retreat in Arizona to strengthen our marital bond and will be gone next weekend.”

Choose (A) or (B) in the comments!

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Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

B. No parents, more fun.

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
9 years ago

An HB surf adventure is obviously like the Oi Rio Pro: people may be interested but it’s not because of the waves. Maybe the Grit needs to focus more on erotic fiction?

Ami Lost
Ami Lost
9 years ago

B Mom and Dad gone for the weekend. Who knows what kind of trouble the kid can find and a much better opportunity for us to help him make life choices. Some of my favorites were why is the pool full beer bottle labels, why are there 40 wine coolers under your bed and one of the all time greats, why in the hell is the side of your car caved in?

SoCalGary
SoCalGary
9 years ago
Reply to  Ami Lost

don’t forget the “forgetting that the Dr. is out of town, the hot office nurse has some documents for the dad to sign and comes by the house during the party” story line…Too obvious?

Ami Lost
Ami Lost
9 years ago
Reply to  SoCalGary

Now we’re getting somewhere, Dad returns reinvested to wedded bliss Goes back to work on Monday where he hears rumors that Junior banged his side piece.

Sailor_Boy69@hotmail.com
9 years ago

Chas, I hope this reaches you in time, will you allow me to get pissed drunk on Coors, rip some lines of coke (these two are really not up to you actually), then let me finish this story? I once wrote an article for you (under another name), plus it seems no one likes this so why not let me take the fall? I live in downtown HB and see Simpo and Kanoa’s little brother surf norfside of HB pier everyday, in fact they probably know me, not by name, but as the guy who sits right next to the pier and is so fucked off his ass on coke that he can’t even look into the setting sun. I also hate Newport beach! You can pay me in anyway you like!

hunter biden pipe master
hunter biden pipe master
9 years ago

A!

Otto
Otto
9 years ago

Fall in love with a wave (54th st.) that breaks 20 feet from shore, you are surely going to fall in love with a nurse that is never further than 20 feet away.
I choose (A). Samantha is such a naughty nurse name it belongs in a “Dear Penthouse,…..” article.
I like the character development that finally happened. Lets get to know Samantha.

Jon Pyzel
Jon Pyzel
9 years ago

Please stop this horrible ride we are on here

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  Jon Pyzel

You could have a while ago but the people chose to continue’

Jon Pyzel
Jon Pyzel
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

I guess I’ll just have to close my eyes and wait for it to be over

Otto
Otto
9 years ago
Reply to  Jon Pyzel

hahahardy boy reader

Litmus and Chill
Litmus and Chill
9 years ago

This is short-sighted. Who knows what will happen if mom and dad go out of town.

Litmus and Chill
Litmus and Chill
9 years ago

Promise Keepers© don’t break their promises! B.

hunter biden pipe master
hunter biden pipe master
9 years ago

A! A! AAAAA!

hunter biden pipe master
hunter biden pipe master
9 years ago

I can already feel my love for her

nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
9 years ago

what the fuck is this shit?

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
9 years ago

Tell your dad that his hair and waist line are a fucken joke and that his new tart will never love him.


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