Did you know everyone is sponsored in Malibu? Me neither!
So guess what Laird Hamilton has done NOW?
Just kiddin! But I am proud of how tightly I grabbed him by the pussy and how absurdly long I held on. That was, like, two full days of nothin but Laird. A personal best and it will be difficult to surpass even by sometime yoga instructional website The Inertia.
But let us move away from Laird’s doctoral thesis and into his home town of Malibu! There is a new YouTube serial called Malibu Surf which… ummmm… I’ll let the show’s creator tell you.
“Imagine a world where 4 beautiful boys, 4 beautiful girls, surf, sand, drama and romance are the norm! This is real life for Rio, Joey, Ally, Jacob, Keaton, Courtney, Sofia and Sean. They all live in Malibu, CA and spend their days lying on the beach or surfing and their nights causing mischief in Malibu or going to parties. Some of them are friends…some of them are frenemies… but all of them live in a world where it’s a surfers paradise!”
I’ll admit I was slightly confused when I first read because it is not Surfers Paradise and has nothing to do with Australia’s Gold Coast. It is Malibu. And it opens with one girl asking another girl, “What’s Maui like? I’ve never been there.” And her answering, “It’s so different than here. Like, it’s kind of the same how everyone knows everyone here but the surfing is so much more corporate here.” And the the first one says, “Yeah, if you don’t have a sponsor you’re kinda out.”
Fucking corporate Malibu surf scene with all its sponsored groms.
Lame. Where’s the soul n shit?
Not sure if surf based reality tv, aggressive friend zone reality tv or wistful feminine hygiene product advertisement?
They are barely able to surf so who the fuck would “sponsor” them? Maybe they were given a free sticker or something. I made it as far as the pidgin speak and turned it off.
I just threw up a bit in my mouth
this is what I imagine the tv Equivalent of syphilis would look like 👾👾💀☠️
Just pounding huge spikes in surfing’s coffin. On the bright side it could be cool to watch the ice head chick from Hawaii fuck up everyone’s shit.
lmao who is going to sponsor anyone in malibu? birdwell beach britches?
This show is probably what made Laird complain about menstruation
This made me so uncomfortable
me too mike, me too… watching a bunch of kooks pretend they love rio when i know what she wants in a way that no one could ever fathom made me want to slam my dick in the laptop
Or maybe I slammed my dick in the laptop when the privepdge young pricks started trying to talk pidgin. Either way, it was uncomfortable!
“What’s ‘Living Lahaina’ like? I never watched it.”
“It’s so different than ‘Malibu Surf’. Like it’s kind of the same how everyone is white, but it’s way more MTV than independently produced for youtube.”
Made it through 54 seconds of these arm-flailing tweeny twats before I got sick
You shouldn’t be able to use the term “surfers paradise” without invoking Kiwi’s and rack.
For your display of wizardry in captioning skill, you will now be known as Chas “The V-Necked Captioneer” Smith… just give it a few minutes, it will definitely stick…
I was going to watch Malibu Surf, Then I just carried on living my life
holy shit that was so bad
diversity… an old wooden ship. shocked nobody in the group is named Kip.
no but they do have a keaton which is somehow even more duchey
Where’s token? Not only does he surf, but he rips a mean Bass riff