Is the world's greatest surfer gaming the WSL?
Now that J-Bay’s dust has settled and the rightful winner dutifully crowned let us return our attention back to Kelly Slater. Have you forgotten, amidst the flurry of airs the barrage of wraps, that the world’s greatest surfer broke his foot and had to withdraw from not only the South African leg of the tour but maybe the rest of the year?
It is truly a shame.
Many posit that now is the time for Slater to trot into retirement. His body breaking down etc. Many more are confused about what would bring him back to the World Surf League Championship Tour. One dashing expert, though, interviewed for Australia’s ABC news suggested that Kelly is gaming the system. Shall we read?
The Jeffreys Bay event again garnered international attention due to several stoppages due to sightings of large sharks and 11-time world champion Kelly Slater breaking bones in his foot while preparing for a heat.
Slater hinted on Instagram the injury will see him out of action for up to six weeks effectively ending his 2017 campaign and chance of winning at 12th world title.
“The challenge will be healing with awareness, patience and good health,” the 45-year-old posted.
“Not one of the better days in recent memory, I can’t even touch my foot right now.”
Surf writer and author Chas Smith was one of many to speculate the injury would not lead to Slater leaving professional surfing after over 25 years and 55 professional wins.
“He is way past the point of no return as it relates to retiring gracefully,” Smith told the ABC.
“Kelly can’t stop traveling the world and loves surfing the world’s most iconic waves with just one other man in the lineup. He will continue surfing professionally-and is good enough to do so-until the WSL pulls him aside and says, ‘Kelly-you’re fired'”.
And what? Could this bald-faced conspiracy from one Chas Smith possibly be true? Might Kelly Slater be surfing on tour not for championships or even heat victories but merely to surf basically alone?
Wouldn’t you?!?
Tell me about Slater’s traction placement. Too far up or just right for old man shredage like it was 1999
obviuosly the guys a fucking god, but I gots to honest I’m sick of the old cunt.
Toe is me?
In other Breaking News on Australia’s ABC
BeachGrit = Fun Mainstream Media = Australia’s ABC
BeachGrit often gets confused for Australia’s ABC when it’s walking down the street.
http://abc7.com/food/austra…
Is ABC kids news?
Nope its the Australian Broadcasting Corporation. Do u know anything that doesn’t relate to bratwurst and Hitler propaganda?…
whoa man
Chas did you get the welcome Email from Sophie yet?
Yes! You? Tim Baker got one and it made me angry.
No- sad face.
I felt angry too; he doesn’t even write about pro surfing anymore!
edit: just checked junk folder and there was an email from you……sorry for no response, now I feel like a dirtbag for saying you’d look like an orphaned chihuahua if you had no hair.
“No- sad face.” Did you just take on the culture of emojis right there?!? You get after those bald headed no hair emojis LongTom! Like a boss who’s name deserves a capital letter!
😢, 😭 or just ☹️?
Always 🤗👍👌,
superworm
how did you do that Superworm?
🤳📱👈(😀😎🤗…)🗯️!
Sheesh, will you two stop flirting and get a room already.
Who’s Keyser Baakkerrr eh?
Some say he’s the editor of slow life but no one’s really sure….some say the definitive voice of down the rabbit hole. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was convincing the surfing world he didn’t exist. Wasn’t slow. Wasn’t life.. Wasn’t slow life.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I got one! Wrote back! No reply!
what does it say?
“Dear Sophie,
***I’m singing this***
I got a golden ticket…..I got a golden ticket!
I can’t wait to be pen pals with you, I’m dancing like Jiminy Cricket!
Reply soon!
Your BFF,
Nicky Carroll”
Ooops now she has replied. Now I feel as much of a bastard as Chas.
You think she reads BeachGrit and felt bad she didn’t reply after seeing your post above? You can’t be the only one who wrote back. Did she reply to everyone who wrote back or just her “specials”?
Dude about 70 people read Beachgrit.
And she wrote back to everyone. I tell yas what, even after 10 minutes of communication, I’m pretty sure Sophie Goldschmidt is about 45 parsecs ahead of Paul Speaker.
Its July now. It’s kind of fitting that come the end of January we’ll get an accurate measurement. In the meantime, lets hope the WSL updates their Wikipedia page to reflect the new CEO.
Well she reckons she doesn’t actually start till mid-August.
I like a business woman that “reckons”. I always associate it with them keeping an ear to the ground.
Business women are always reckoning.
Excellent. What about that interview…?
Thought this was his last year…
Omg, this headline! It is so McGovern and Ibogaine.
hahaha
And on Hemingway’s birthday, nonetheless. Oh the shame.
I can see him doing the Pipe Masters until he’s collecting Social Security but I can’t see him flying the 30+ hours to surf three heats at J-Bay.
(P.S. I’m pretty impressed that the Aussie media is using you as a surfing expert, Chas. And you’re not even a graduate of that surf academy thingy they have there.)