Enchanted fairies or manufactured clothes horses?
Do you believe in fairies? I do.
I believe enchantment lies all around us.
My favourite fairy is the professional soul surfer, mostly men who are paid to project anti-capitalist, anti-contest personas. (The female equivalent, of course, is the sex toy surfer, paid to project availability, always photographed with hams elevated, glutes oiled, mouth parted and so forth.)
Earlier today, Chas Smith skewered the soul surfer Joel Tudor for his apparent hypocrisy over his no-booze sponsorship rule. Read there here.
Just after it was published, a surf industry man called me and told me a couple of stories about soul surfers and what he said was their overwhelming hypocrisy.
Story one: Standing on a cliff at La Jolla, in California, he watched as a pro soul surfer followed a man to the beach after a drop-in, kicked his surfboard until it snapped and then allowed his pals, who’d rushed down the steps, to pulp him.
Story two: During the Noosa Longboard Festival a very well-known hipster soul cat grabbed his leash and tried to fight him (the back story is, soul cat had dropped in four times and, on the fourth wave, nose-dived. Our surf industry man pushed the leashless board onto the rocks). On the beach, the same surfer that was at La Jolla (coincidence!), told our surf industry pal that he’d better watch his back. And, a little later, surf industry man was warned by another soul person that if he went to the party night he’d be lured into a dark corner by the La Jolla man and have his arm snapped.
Oh we laughed and laughed.
And, suddenly, I didn’t believe so much in fairies.
But, you?
The Pro Soul Surfer.
Faux?
Or real?
Joels pretty vocal in his opinions, but at least his surfing is legit be it cross stepping on a log or pulling in at pipe an he can get on the mat an roll with the best of em. Now back to this soul surfer angry man. Who who who ?
I feel ya Sean, but this is what you’re facing.
PS: No offence but in this scene you’re the fat fella.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Dammit I need meth now.
this needs back-up music!!!
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Chas, Derek. Hold your ground. Do not sell just yet. the plot is thickening before our very eyes.
bird rock bandits strike again.
I put the vid on for about 5 secs and realised to be a soul surfer gotta make it in black and white and hazy/ grainy – no sound at work computer but music is probably what guessing it to be full of ” soul” too no??
Its the ones that profess they aren’t in it for the money that you really have to watch out for. Don’t ever take your eyes off Rasta. He does wetwork for Patagonia, which everyone knows is a CIA front to control the heroin trade coming out of Antarctica.
Is it true that Alex knost and Harrison Roach are the same person?
And is it also true that Ford Archibold is the greatest pro of all time? Soul or not?
Soul Surfers are just fairies though, no? Is that what you saying??
Tudors nickname is tinkerbell
Then why is Joel Tudor always beating up manchilds?
whose manchilds?
Is that what Wardo whispers in his ear?
Turns out Saul Tudor’s quite the bjj bully
Lest the commentariat makes imputations that are thoroughly untrue, BeachGrit wishes to make clear that there is no suggestion that the surfer in question was Mr Joel Tudor.
Indeed, I was of course talking about a Brazilian Rabbi
Correct! Dang Jooz!
your lawyer is writing your comments now..??… ehh ?? ehh??
Well who is it then? Whooooooo?
I think you can rest assured it wasn’t Alex Knost.
Let’s leave bjj out of this again please.
It’s competitive and progressive.
Nobody got famous in BJJ by Instagraming their trust fund converted kombi van and refusing to shower and shave.
Bjj has it’s interlopers. I’m sure we have more in common than you think Super
Very true. One of my kids has been rolling half of his life. Go to a contest (so many studs!) and there isn’t a single bad vibration. Impressive sport.
With that skill, hopefully your kid will be the last out of his mates to cause any trouble too
So what you’re saying is that Chas snapped Joel’s board on the beach, and that we’re (commentariat) trying to lure Joel into a dark corner at the BeachGrit party to snap his soul? If yes, I agree.