John John Florence (pictured) allegedly stares into a Monsterless world!
John John Florence (pictured) allegedly stares into a Monsterless world! | Photo: Morgan Maasen

Rumor: John John drops sponsor!

What does the future hold for the world's favorite surfer?

John John Florence is the most marketable surfer on the planet. Do we all agree? His combination of skill, age, potential and professionalism make him a sponsor’s dream. Also, he is not cluttered with branding. Hurley, Nixon, Futures, Spy, Monster and Pyzel are the only marks that appear on his surfboard.

Well guess what.

The Monster claw is allegedly getting peeled right off!

No more John John x Monster Energy!

A cursory glance at Monster’s website reveals that the young Oahuan has been scrubbed leaving Jobe Hariss, Geroid McDaid and Owen + Tyler Wright in his wake.

Did John John choose to leave or did Monster push him out?

Oh, I know you. I know you are guffawing right now. You are saying, maybe even aloud, “Pssssssht. Why would you think I even care, man?” But you forget two thing.

1) We haven’t had a professional championship tour contest in eighteen months.

2) John John and Monster Energy purportedly parting ways opens up a whole world of wonder as to what the young man will do. Are you ready for your quiz? Let’s do this thing!

Will John John Florence…

A) Start a beer brand

B) Start a coconut water brand

C) Slide over to Red Bull

D) Other

If he starts a beer brand who will his cursory three partners be?

A) His brothers Nathan and Ivan plus Jamie O’Brien

B) Joe Turpel, Ron “Dawg” Blakey and Strider Wasilewski

C) Jobe Hariss, Geroid McDaid and Owen or Tyler Wright

D) Other

What will the beer brand be called?

A) St. Balter

B) Poof of Spit

C) MNSTR (pronounced “Minister” not “Monster” of course)

D) Other

Who will drink the beer brand?

A) You

B) Your dad

C) Joe Turpel, Ron “Dawg” Blakey and Strider Wasilewski

D) Other

If he starts a coconut water brand will it have a bit of sexual innuendo in its name?

A) Yes

B) No

C) Other

If yes will the coconut water brand be called…

A) Deez Nuts

B) Cream of Sum Yung Gai

C) Nut Juice

D) Other

Comments move to a new system on Tuesday 22 September 2026. Your existing comments come with you. From that day you comment with wpDiscuz instead of Disqus, right here on the same page.
Load Comments