Podcast: “Surf media smashes the WSL!”

Would Pottz or Chas Smith win in a surf contest? Wrong(ish)!

It is time again for your close to biweekly podcast featuring the professional David Lee Scales and me. And let me be very frank up front. I thought we had a lot of surf things to chew over but once seated in front of the mic I couldn’t remember many. Or any. David Lee did an admirable job keeping the ship moving but… I feel I let him down.

I feel I let you down.

This episode features gun control, guitar hero, capitalism, libertarianism, O’Neill’s disastrous marketing arm, the futility of local wildcards, Kelly Slater’s love of shaming other wave pool technologies, the idiocy of content, O’Neill’s super weird surf team, LuluLemon’s cult, Nick GoPro making a billboard of himself, Pottz’s inability to surf in the modern era because he has a boring voice, why the WSL commentators would get smashed by basically anyone in the surf media (excluding yours truly), asymmetry, technobutter, microbeads, x, ex, xcel, carbon fiber, carbon fibre, thermoflex, thumping beach barrels, Filipe Toledo and you.

Never mind. Everything here pretty much rules.

Listen now!

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Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
8 years ago

I watched Joe Turpel ride a whole wave in front of me once as I was paddling back out. He rode it pretty well so when he got back to the line up I paddled over to him and took him through it, blow by blow, in my very dullest monotone. When he tried to paddle away I followed because I hadn’t hit a few of my key phrases. I hadn’t mentioned “vision” or “jam” or “knifing”. And I hadn’t asked him if he wanted to jump on the ski and re-set.

ashtongoggans
ashtongoggans
8 years ago

Grant Ellis gets mistaken for Curren at George’s daily; as for Todd…

Bring it.

:*

Anthony Arturo Leone
Anthony Arturo Leone
8 years ago

You guys forgot aboit Brett Barley on the O’Neil team. I agree about the shit branding though, but i mention brett because his entire career is based on content creation.

Head Dip
Head Dip
8 years ago

Here are 84 pages of unbiased wetsuit review from people who paid full retail.

http://forum.surfer.com/for…

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
8 years ago

O’Neill is the wierdest. I haven’t listened so you may have mentioned it, but, the fuck is this shit? https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
8 years ago

looks like some designer just re-watched braveheart and was trying to get fired, all in the same day.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
8 years ago
Reply to  dickie toledo

Or, knowing O’Neill, was trying to get promoted.

David Lee Scales
David Lee Scales
8 years ago

Yes! This is the campaign I was talking about. WTF?!!

Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
8 years ago

I reckon they took some last words of wisdom from ol’ Jack on his death bed about the next marketing campaign.

This is what he came up with.

But give him a break, he was dying.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
8 years ago

And become a color scheme for WaveStorms.

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
8 years ago

I’ll have to rememember to keep forgetting to buy that mag.

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

no app. where do I get?

velobwoy
velobwoy
8 years ago
Reply to  longtom

App Store. You should have an icon on your phone for that

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago
Reply to  velobwoy

Hahaha. Fuck, just write it out and read to him.

ashtongoggans
ashtongoggans
8 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

Amazing.

East of the 5
East of the 5
8 years ago
Reply to  ashtongoggans

Home of the smartest podcast listeners & website readers in the game….

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago

Rasta the colorway?

Albert Munz
Albert Munz
8 years ago

Hey Steve….oh don’t worry.

longtom
longtom
8 years ago

How do I put on the phone? I want to mow the lawn and listen.

Explain as if talking to a retarded 5 year old with severe learning difficulty.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago

I was joking. You’re just being super fucking nasty.

Return of the Samsung Board
Return of the Samsung Board
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Way to get heavy on it hey

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

At least you make the people feel SOMETHING!

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

You have a private education? No wonder you’re so much better than me!

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Sadly no I don’t, I have no idea what that guy is on about, I went to the magnificently semi retarded public Pittwater High School in Mona Vale, where my friends and I earned lasting fame on our final day of school by mounting a six foot papier mache penis on top of the tallest available building.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

But one could ,thanks to Gough Whitlam go to uni for free in those wonderful hot buttered years.Had a magic board from Greg Trotter at KC surfboards out of the Mona Vale factory during that era .Did the penis have water views?A powerful symbol of your future profession.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago

The Penis could see everything. It had Powers.

Bunyip Bum
Bunyip Bum
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Pittwater high was actually pretty gnarly back in the day. I took a chick out from there.. She fingered me.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  Bunyip Bum

Glad to see that Puberty Blues was not restricted to Sydney’s Southern Extremity

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Pranks were so much better in the old days. The early 80’s saw a cadre of malcontents cut off a white Falcon XE roof, whack a blue flashing light and siren on a single roof rack, attach enough flotation to keep it afloat and let it loose in the local river beside a major road. The cherry on top was the cop who dived in to bravely save his mates.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago

More Yemen please. Or has it concluded?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

No! Day after tomorrow!

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

I just listened and I cannot fucking believe you unionised surf media.
I tip my fucking hat to you.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago

You’re out of your minds, I’d smash the lot of yas on a single fin.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

I was trying to figure out what outlet you write for the most!

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

I’m a Soul Writer man. I write for myself. Not the fucking people. Me!

Otto
Otto
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Like an old nickelodeon that charged a nickel.

ashtongoggans
ashtongoggans
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Was it your quiver of Byrnes that has been haunting me, Nick? Channel bottom swallows sprawled out in a backyard, maybe? It’s been driving me mad!

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago
Reply to  ashtongoggans

Right I’m gonna shoot a channel quiver pic just for you AG

ashtongoggans
ashtongoggans
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Do you know the photo I’m talking about?!

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago
Reply to  ashtongoggans

ah yeah probably at Hornbaker’s in HI back in the day, I don’t have that pic though

ashtongoggans
ashtongoggans
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Not even the one I was thinking of. Older shot, like mid-90s?
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago
Reply to  ashtongoggans

clockwise from front: 6’4″ Dale Wilson/AB, 6’5″ AB, 7’0″ AB, 7’1″ AB, 8’1″ AB, 6’5″ FF 10 channel, 6’0″ Dale Wilson, 6’3″ AB, 5’9″ Dale Wilson. Doesn’t count the ones in Hawaii. The 8’1″ is the best surfboard I’ve ever owned or ridden.

ashtongoggans
ashtongoggans
8 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Masterful quiver, jesus christ man. I’m always scouring Craigslist for Spears.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
8 years ago
Reply to  ashtongoggans
Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
8 years ago

Never apologise to the people. We will judge you harshly anyway.

East of the 5
East of the 5
8 years ago
Reply to  Eddie Haiku

fuck that was good….

Lemmy
Lemmy
8 years ago

if you are buying wetsuits off a marketing campaign you are a kook

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago
Reply to  Lemmy

Except technobutter. No word has ever charmed me so.

Lemmy
Lemmy
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

anything with “2” after is just pleasing the stockholders that new product with higher prices points and no real technological advancement came out and sell in is higher than last year.


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