Here Kelly dances with Dirty Gabe. How many partners has he had?
Here Kelly dances with Dirty Gabe. How many partners has he had?

Conspiracy: Kelly secret Hurley agent?

Did Kelly Slater spend years cheating on Quiksilver?

The great Kelly Slater and Quiksilver were one of the finest duos in surf history. Each achieved maximum thrust through the 1990s and 2000s. Each became singularly iconic. Kelly, with his handsome tan skin and twinkling eye. Quiksilver with a logo/team/size that made pure mockery out of Billabong, Rip Curl, Hot Tuna. What would Kelly have been without Quiksilver? What would Quiksilver have been without Kelly? We sort of have the answer now, I suppose. Kelly would have been aesthetically lost. Quiksilver would have gone bankrupt. And while it is sad the two split up we’ll always have those 20 years.

How much do you think Quiksilver paid Kelly during that run? $20 million? $40 million?

Is it possible that Kelly was also secretly riding for Hurley some of that time and collecting even more money?

That would be singularly scandalous but maybe it is true. Derek Rielly pointed out the moment in the latest #tournotes the moment. Let’s recall.

First, he (Kelly) makes a crack about not being sponsored and asks whom I presume to be Bob McKnight from Quiksilver’s kid (surf industry people, correct me if I’m wrong) for money as he’s currently not sponsored.

“As you know I don’t have a sponsor…technically… any more and you know your father has sponsored me for years,” says Kelly.
The man opens his wallet and says, “I don’t think there’s much in here.”

I watched the moment twice and it is certainly not Quiksilver founder/legend Bob McKnight’s wonderful son Robbie. No. It is Hurley founder Bob’s eldest son Jeff.

Now, I guarantee that Kelly knows Robbie very well. I am certain that he wasn’t confused. Which leaves us all with only one possible conclusion as to what Kelly was talking about.

He was sponsored by Hurley for years and that sponsorship would have overlapped Kelly’s Quiksilver sponsorship. A sordid hidden affair only revealed in an unscripted, off-the-cuff moment. The fact that Quiksilver and Kelly have been broken up for some years now lessens the pain maybe, like the husband who finds out his wife was cheating post-divorce, but I must wonder if the Hurley x Kelly affair still smolders?

Do you think the greatest surfer ever will officially kick OK to the curb and join John John, Julian, Filipe and Kolohe further strengthening professional surfing’s strongest gang?

All is fair in love and war.

Watch at the 1:30 mark and note the complete lack of confusion from Jeff Hurley when Kelly says, “Your father has sponsored me for years.

#Tournotes: The Faithful
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f u
f u
8 years ago

a drug that makes you loose your hair

Sampson
Sampson
8 years ago

Maybe it was like a “your mom Joke”, just talking shit.

Like “your mom sponsored me for years”

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago

he’s on 10l of lychee kombucha daily

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
8 years ago

He’s a jenkem man

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Someone needs to convince the Inertia to commission an article on the underground NS hipster Jenkem scene.

wincy
wincy
8 years ago

Hanging from the oaktree, how apt.

wincy
wincy
8 years ago

Fermented purps

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago

Bailey’s Irish Cream Salted Caramel. Wait, does he do dairy?

janeausten
janeausten
8 years ago

..and in news just to hand, the Tokyo Olympics will have a field 20 surfers of each gender selected via a “Dog’s Breakfast” format.
20 is not a number that pares down heat by heat to a 2 person final, or even a 3 person [ie gold/ silver/ bronze] final as best I can do the sums….so its got to be a wavepool event without heats as such.
I’m not that good at sums, though.

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

five man Rd 1 heats, top 3 advance? still some weird shit, doesn’t bode well.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  bitter guy

20 people all at once. Winner-est takes gold. Paddle battles to achieve priority within pre-determined 10m2 takeoff zone.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Like the old school wrestling cage match .Maybe throw in a shark , crocodile and blue bottles to give it an authentic feel and spice up the SHOW

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Extra points for creative costume/ board ensemble.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

BRAVO . ESTHETICS ARE SO IMPORTANT

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Synchronised team round to musical theme.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Yes at night with laser light show and celebratory pyrotechnics or should the spectators just wave their i phones in the air like candles in the wind .

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

The main round should have random explosions of water within field. Resettable random high-pressure pulses from sea-bed installed ‘cannon’ that knock competitors off wave into flats.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Yes I can see it now . Apocalypse Now Olympic Surfing Extravaganza . Can someone from LA call Francis Ford Cappola and invite him to collaborate with the A.N.O.S.E Project . I love the smell of A.N.O.S.E in the morning . It smells like ( Olympic) victory .

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

let them wrap their hands in cloth, resin, and broken glass

janeausten
janeausten
8 years ago
Reply to  bitter guy

Possible but wierd. WSL will be down on all fours lobbying for the contract to build the pool.

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

and Webber will claim their wave has no trough

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Sounds a bit like a 5 ring circus to me .

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
8 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Is true? Boxing format, perhaps. Red Bull Cape Fear in one-foot Tsurigasaki.

Dipset
Dipset
8 years ago

I think he was just awkwardly trying to cover up their gambling in front of the camera. Way more boring but.. ah shit i wish i had time to write something funny.

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
8 years ago

Aleeda, counter culture and surfers alliance paid him a handsome sum not to wear their wetsuits and clothes.

Miki Dora's bastard son
Miki Dora's bastard son
8 years ago

Kelly is referencing the fact that when his contract with Quick was up several years into it . He used Hurley as leverage to get more dough from Quick. Having a meeting with Bob and Bob telling him he’s worth more. Also winning Trestles and Bob adding more prize money.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago

Well that’s a lot different than “Your father sponsored me for years…”

Miki Dora's bastard son
Miki Dora's bastard son
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

It’s just Kelly being cute and sarcastic is all. No need to read into it any deeper.

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Maybe Kelly was in A.A. And bob was his sponsor.

Mapski
Mapski
8 years ago

Multiple Trestles victories. At least three at Hurley’s expense.

Slurpline
Slurpline
8 years ago

He admitted it at Surfer Poll a few years ago. Juicy part starts at 4:45. In an unrelated note, y’all looking to hire a surf conspiracy theorist?

https://youtu.be/b8BvpyNu2F…

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago
Reply to  Slurpline

Boom. The plot thickens…

Stu Azole
Stu Azole
8 years ago

I don’t think Kelly is the draw he thinks he is anymore.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Stu Azole

He’s big in the 40+ demographic. You know, the cheapskate bastards who won’t shell out for any corporate tat.

wincy
wincy
8 years ago

Those losers. Nothing better than getting up on a cold winters day to emblazon myself with blue below the knee length Billabong board shorts complete with Billabong wallet packed full of receipts in the small pocket down the leg to make my shorts swing eccentric as I walk with a green Volcom tshirt to let the world know I’m still rebellious and a red Quicksilver hat to let my ex-wife know I mean business as I try and get my kids attention at the footy match from the police enforced distance throwing odd shakas whilst I smoke Marlboro’s to let them know that I still surf.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
8 years ago
Reply to  wincy

Mate the velcro wallet is alright I reckon

wincy
wincy
8 years ago

I prefer the cheap leather ones stuffed full of Blockbuster cards, coins, receipts, a $2 scratchie, loyalty cards, no drivers license and emptiness.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
8 years ago
Reply to  wincy

Where’s your Timezone card mate don’t you know how to have fun?

wincy
wincy
8 years ago

Pokies mate.

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago

too right, he’s big with golfers and boardroom beach boys

Samuel Hall
Samuel Hall
8 years ago
Reply to  Stu Azole

You obviously haven’t been at a comp when he’s heat is on then. The beach will be empty unless its a JJF or Kelly heat.

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
8 years ago
Reply to  Samuel Hall

uh, yeah. Nobody even noticed he was gone after J-Bay

J H
J H
8 years ago

A scarf? On the beach in Hawaii? Chas, please…talk some sense into that boy.

Dipset
Dipset
8 years ago
Reply to  J H

serong* so hot right now

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
8 years ago
Reply to  Dipset

sarong so right

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  Bleach'd Git

Sarong and thanks for the memories.

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

sarong suckers

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago
Reply to  Bleach'd Git

Sarong and thanks for all the fish.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  Bleach'd Git

And you can tell everybody this is your sarong

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Two sarongs don’t make it right.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

Que sarong, sarong… whatever will be, will be.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

The Futures™ not ours to see.

f u
f u
8 years ago
Reply to  Dipset

pareo


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