Kelly and Giselle
Kelly Slater (right) pictured lounging on the beach with Tom Brady's wife.

Breaking: Kelly Slater in Super Bowl!

Singing "I like beer!"

In less than one week the National Football League will host the LII Super Bowl in Minneapolis, Minnesota. This year’s big game pits the dominant New England Patriots against the upstart Philadelphia Eagles. The Eagles are being led by second-string quarterback Nick Foles, who nobody likes, while the Patriots have Tom Brady under center. He is considered the greatest football player of all time with some considering him the greatest athlete of all time.

He is married to the Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bündchen who once dated Kelly Slater.

Speaking of, Adweek reported just five minutes ago that the greatest surfer of all time will be in the Super Bowl too, appearing in a Michelob Ultra commercial starring the actor Chris Pratt.

“Michelob Ultra has always been a different beer,” said Liz Taylor, CCO at FCB Chicago, in a statement. “The beer for the fit. Who better to help us get that message across in an entertaining way on the world’s biggest advertising stage than an actor who embodies the ethos of the brand: Chris Pratt. He’s fit. He’s funny as hell. He loves beer.”

Pratt will star alongside famous athletes, including golfer Brooks Koepka, surfer Kelly Slater and runner Shalane Flanagan. Together, the group will sing along to a Michelob Ultra anthem: “I Like Beer” by country singer Jon Pardi.

Michelob Ultra, as you know, is the title sponsor of the World Surf League.

Here is the commercial that doesn’t have Kelly Slater singing “I like beer” but it will be posted as soon as available.

Would Derek and I look good serving Michelob Ultra when we get our bar gigs?

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omlete
omlete
8 years ago

I would never order a Michelob for fear that I would pronounce it wrongly. You can’t go wrong with XXXX.

brye
brye
8 years ago

has kelly decided to grow his hair for 2018? could we possibly see the middle aged mullet throughout the year?

nicky buttonshaw
nicky buttonshaw
8 years ago

Thats why kelly hates going to Brazil.
Burnt by a Brazo goddess.
The guy has been with some fine woman though. Respect.
Michelob Ultra…anyone that names their own product Ultra is lame.. imho

nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
8 years ago

thought kelly didnt drink?

brye
brye
8 years ago

I wonder if the WSL will announce Michelob Ultra its major sponsor at the KS wavepool this year?

Otto
Otto
8 years ago

On an unrelated matter, I chuckled when I saw a Stab badvertorial article posted with a ***Disclaimer*** – they did not pay us to do this.

Chas is in Ashton’s head. Disclaimer!?! Ha!

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
8 years ago
Reply to  Otto

Who paid for the disclaimer?

Otto
Otto
8 years ago

We should dissect who “will pay” for the disclaimer. The author?
Bad optics in light of the embargo. A comment but not really. Slipped past Ash during a cunty hat change.

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
8 years ago
Reply to  Otto

So we can safely assume that any badvertorial that doesn’t feature this disclaimer is an fact a paid badvertorial. I guess.

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
8 years ago

The question is irrelevant. The People’s bar must serve salty lumps of driftwood.

PS: The beer for the fit?

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  Bleach'd Git

Packed with nano robots disguised as sugar / alcohol that convince the zinc atoms in the cells they are oxidizing beer giving one the euphoric impression that one is drunk while simultaneously chewing on ones excess fat . And now for the gamma ……..gamma =3 rd letter of the Greek Alphabet,helium = inert gas first detected on the sun(Helios)Slater=GOAT.

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
8 years ago

You been hitting the soma again, James?

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago
Reply to  Bleach'd Git

Brave New World needs a brave few who need a big cold soma( served in hand made driftwood chalices).

david fffff
david fffff
8 years ago

Chas, how much did Michelob pay for this article? You sellouts! You fraud hacks!

Brutus
Brutus
8 years ago
Reply to  david fffff

I can see it now , BG/derek/Chas , working in the Michelnob club , serving a gay ,joyful and happy clientele , with nobs of beer!

Craven Morehead
Craven Morehead
8 years ago

There’s you’re advertorial

Manuka
Manuka
8 years ago

Chasvertorial

Blunted Sultan
Blunted Sultan
8 years ago

Had a chance encounter with Kelly as he was about to paddle out at my local break last week. No else around, we exchanged pleasantries and a very brief chat about the swell.

He was completely engaging and cool. Dude looks like he is 25 years old too.

It must be all the Michelob Ultra.

GabbyHatesToSurf
GabbyHatesToSurf
8 years ago

I Like Cocaine

Robinhood
Robinhood
8 years ago

I would like to be Kelly slater and never have done cocaine.

Brutus
Brutus
8 years ago
Reply to  Robinhood

shit how do you drink beer without cocaine?

regularguy
regularguy
8 years ago

A 42 year old woman who looks no younger than 53 that just hopped off the back of a Harley and put the last cigarette of her 2nd pack that day out just in time to wheeze “Got Mick Ultra?” to the bartender. That’s generally who orders Michelob Ultra. Good people nonetheless.

surfmom
surfmom
8 years ago
Reply to  regularguy

You’ve mistaken Michelob; a beer that, in America, is primarily consumed by golf and tennis fans (and to a lesser extent other sports) at the 19th hole or clubhouse pub respectively, with Budweiser – the definitive beverage of the bar-going, ciggy sucking, old-but-still-older-looking biker broad.

regularguy
regularguy
8 years ago
Reply to  surfmom

I’m sure those people do drink michelob. These are just my observations from working at a bar. They aren’t so much someone who drinks bud but someone who used to drink Coors Light.

surfmom
surfmom
8 years ago
Reply to  regularguy

Fair assessment.

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
8 years ago

I’m super excited to see Kelly singing!

Otto
Otto
8 years ago

I think you should let Derek sling fit bit beers while you post up at the omelet bar. The eggs are a metaphor for your articles; some standard scrambled, some egg whites and some egg substitute. Enjoy ample time to rumor monger waving your open palm above the impressive array of omelet accompaniments.

Kelly will have to capitulate to the
auto-tune.

SoCalGary
SoCalGary
8 years ago
Reply to  Otto

I think you left out the metaphorical Deviled Egg (a story that is just plain evil, Easter Egg (a story hidden within the story or buried lead) and Rotten Egg….(I will let Chas or Derek fill in the details on this one).

Otto
Otto
8 years ago
Reply to  SoCalGary

Fuck! You’re right. Shit! Better than mine!
“Rotten Egg” should be the first single release of your band Puking Gatorade.

Robinhood
Robinhood
8 years ago

That’s old photo right? Like when Kelly used to eat meat?

Otto
Otto
8 years ago
Reply to  Robinhood

Flat earthed photos add like 10lbs.

Robinhood
Robinhood
8 years ago
Reply to  Otto

And hair? I could do with a little more hair like 10lbs.

Otto
Otto
8 years ago
Reply to  Robinhood

Judging by Kelly’s follicle challenges evidenced in the photo, I wish I had better news for you, but, I don’t.
Either that or Kelly’s follicles formed a united front to be closer to Gisele. I’m pretty sure that’s solid flat earth science.

J H
J H
8 years ago
Reply to  Otto

Kelly got out just in time. Rumor has that Tom has gotten hair transplants at the behest of his wife.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
8 years ago

“Michelob Ultra is considered the greatest American beer of all time with some considering it the greatest alcoholic beverage of all time”, there fixed it for you!

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
8 years ago

That’s exactly what we’ll say!

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
8 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

You wouldn’t lie to me Chas?

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
8 years ago

Tonight Special Guest Barmen from Beach Grit will be giving away Michelob Ultra and one lucky customer will win a brand new Gamma Helium Slater Surfboard while some dumb fucker like me will wash the glasses, look after the pokies and clean the ashtrays in the smoking area . Writers / Advertisers = Hoax?Fuck I forgot The T-shirts for the bar owner and the barely post pubescent princesses.THE BEER THAT GIVES YOU A FAT AND NOT A FIT!


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