Snowboarding's Todd Richards is the answer to WSL commentary woes!
The World Surf League’s 2018 season will commence next month and, before last night, I had completely given up on any changes to the announcing crew. Oh you’ve read the gentle prodding directed toward the booth here for years. Like when the great surf historian Matt Warshaw wrote: “Martin Potter’s jaw-grinding voice sounds as if its been filtered through six espresso shots and a migraine headache.” And “Turpel hurts me on a both a professional and personal level.”
But what are we going to do? Every season the prodding gets less and less and less because I’ve lost hope. Complete and utter hope. The WSL is not going to change the lineup and, what’s even worse, before last night I couldn’t even imagine who they could/should introduce. Sal Masekela is too satisfied with his pro surfer friendships, Wassel too hyped, Todd Kline has gone fishing and Trippie Redd is busy leaning. Cote might be great but as a color man not the anchor that holds it all down.
There is no anchor to hold it all down. No savior.
Until last night.
I was watching Olympic snowboarding, you see, and into my ears flooded the velvety pipes of Todd Richards. He is NBC’s “man on the mountain” and was knowledgeable, authoritative, intelligent. He mixed the exact right amount of insider information with helpful beginner explanation all in a rich baritone. He knew when to talk and knew when to shut his mouth, letting the moment breathe.
And he’s handsome. Like, a more masculine/less pudgy Mexican nativity cherub version of Joe Turpel.
“So what?” you say. “Todd Richards ain’t no surfer…”
And I almost lunge across the coffee table right at you because yes he is. Todd Richards lives very near to me in bucolic North County San Diego, surfs often and well. He knows all the grabs, he knows all the jams off the top and squirts off the bottom. He knows it all and I don’t know how this very obvious solution had not become obvious to me before last night.
Todd Richards is the answer to all our surf commentary problems and we should all email the World Surf League’s Santa Monica office today and demand his inclusion. Maybe let’s try [email protected] and if that doesn’t work I’ll give you Dave Prodan’s phone number.
Todd is also from New England too .. Get him in …
Chas is right here, he just makes a crappy case for why Todd Richards should be in the booth. Richards is competent in all three major board sports and the easiest new audience for the WSL to pull in outside of surfers are other boarders (skaters and snowboarders). Coming from skating and snowboarding it is painful to watch the WSL and pro surfing in general bumble around and not have a clue what’s going on when it comes to airs. Christian Fletchers mom literally knows more about the origins, technicalities, and history of airs than anyone (including surfers) at the WSL. Bringing in Todd Richards would only clarify the air game and help broaden the audience. There’s a difference between Albee Layer’s flatspin alley oop backside five forty and Julian Wilson’s alley oop backside rodeo, but from what I’ve seen even Julian Wilson can’t explain it (in one interview he called Albee’s air ‘kiteboardy’, it’s not, it’s a trick. Craig Kelly was doing them on a snowboard in 1988. Peter Line did Julian’s more inverted version in the mid 1990’s. Todd Richards was part of that progression, he understands it and can explain it simply). It seems like surfing desperately pushes back against progress to protect and maintain its current state. Nick Carroll hypothesizing that bringing TR into the commentating booth is somehow a corporate conspiracy is a great example of that. Remember Shaun Thompson’s petition to keep Christian Fletcher’s air game out of contests? Maybe Nick Carroll can create a petition to keep compitent commentators like Todd Richards out of the booth too. It takes work and a real group effort to keep pro surfing in the dark ages. There’s plenty of progress in surfing that has yet to be done, although it’s already been done and defined in other board sports. Why not use the knowledge that’s already there, surfing would benefit from it (Christian Fletchers been saying that for how long?).
How the fuck did I become responsible for Todd not commentating?
Hey Nick, my comment was written quick and hasty, at work. I probably misinterpreted your comment projecting my own biased (coming from other sports and late to surfing) sense that most of surfing wants to protect the status quo. After reading the Russian analogy I wrongly assumed you were making a subtle case against TR. My argument would have been better without that assumption (I was just fired up). I didn’t mean to misrepresent whatever you were saying. I just can’t wait to see surfing progress into doing and understanding classic airs that have already been done!
Yeah I was just making a dry comment about how many people disliked how the surf industry ran pro surfing, but might wish now it was still in charge, in a Stockholm-Syndrome sorta way. Zero to do with Todd’s capacities as a commentator or with protecting anything.
I may be biased but I quite like Adam Replogle’s work in the booth. He’s never called a CT to my knowledge but he’s done some good gabbin’ in a number of QS and ISA events. He’s collected and well spoken. He’s been around pro surfing since he was a just a pup. He qualified for the CT in the early 90’s and blew minds at J-Bay. He even has his signature move, “The Kill”! C’mon Condor, pull some strings!
I want the Swedish Chef to commentate.
I’d tune in religiously for that.
Exhibit A:
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I don’t know how to tell you this. Todd Richards has spent considerable time in the pro surfing commentary box. However this was before the WSL existed — back in the days when the surf industry ran the pro surfing show. Todd could be seen regularly at Quik Pros doing both online commentaries and some live stuff.
I wonder if in some ways there is a desire among the Grit commentariat for the return of the Industry Gig. A bit like the Russians who crave the return of Communism. Once it apparently beat you down — now it seems like a long lost dreamworld.
Wont need any commentators when there is no events!!!! Had a quick look at WSL QS events for 2018 – most are slated as TENTATIVE!!! wont be a tour
Question: What do you get when you cross Gigs Cilliers and Martin Potter? https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Answer: Gigs Cilliers and Martin Potter
What if Turps and Potts had a child together?
What species would it be?
Distant relative of lemurs and Northumberland acorn barnicles.
They’d name it T-Purps. And potty training would be onerous.
Surf Splendor bout II Turpel vs Smith..
Final boss is Dave Stansfield
But I like being told what a barrel is , seeing as I’ve never been in one ? Pottz “91” reverse is still relevant . ALOHA AKBAR
That jacket! It relegates Chas’ pink culottes to the dust bin, a strong sartorial bitch slap, with a no irony chaser
I think it high time we submit a skit request to Dave Chappelle. Charlie Murphy v. Rick James but a fuckin’ nerd surfer and a charade with a chin scar from when they had to surgically remove the corporate nutsack.
https://youtu.be/ZdVAH8Z5O90
Rick James’ hair ! Yeh yeh .
I think he is from Florida, but it’s the same thing more or less, whiny yank accents are all the same!
You gotta be a really skilled broadcaster to do good job at surfing play by play, so much downtime. I like Barton Lynch or the local guys at the Pipe contests.
Barton with Ricky and Bubbles playing hash hockey in the background.
https://youtu.be/TM0i0wU5P9c
I am still blown away that people actually watch the webcasts with the volume on.
May I introduce the esteemed Mr Laird Hamilton to the commentary booth.
esteemed or estrogen teemed?
Are you suggesting there is a causal link between consuming Laird SuperFoods and excessive estrogen production? I’m convinced.
There Will Be Blood !At least periodically.
yasssss here for any and all laird period jokes
Please don’t expose poor Todd to the pissiest, most hopeless professional sport in the universe. Sophie just might forget to sign his contract, pay him or countless other unimaginable oversights.
Man I enjoyed the Red Bull/Volcom produces Pipe Pro product so much… the production, the commentators, the other guys …. The WSL feels like the Olympics product and Pipe Pro was X Games/Dew Tour… I can take the Olympics for a week but if it was the full time content producer for skiing and snowboarding, no thanks..
I’m plumping for Marcel Marceau
Shirley your joking ? The WSL already has a wall of silence .
So many words, so little said
The only commentary team I want for a dreary 1st round is Chas and Ashton!
A preview:
Ashton: This is an amazing heat. The WSL is a perfect platform to see these guys who rip so hard. Owen, a potential World Title contender, Caio, the Brazilian former Rookie of the Year, and Zeke Lau, the big Hawaiian, heir to Sunny Garcia on Tour… this heat is so interesting and full of intrigue, any of these guys can take it to the next level, performance wise…
Chas: They can? None of these guys have a chance at the World Title. The most interesting things to talk about each of these guys would be the questions surrounding each, like what do we not know about Owen’s head injury? Why was Zeke not suspended for storming the judges tower last year when Fileep was? How did Caio bag Alessa Quizon? Why did you file a police report against me?
A: Oh, Chas, you’re such a muckraker… why so negative? Think of the children! The WSL is amaz…
C: None of that answers any of the questions. There are interesting storylines that never get talked about…
A: What’re you talking about. Stab is breaking every single important story… and by the way the WSL let us surf Wave Ranch! Amazeballs…
C: Come on, give me a break…
A: Give me an example of a story…
C: I already gave three… but since you asked, What about the fact that there might be no Pipe!… *talks about Hawaii being surfing, Yemen, Mick, sharks..*
A: I LOVE lontom’s comp write-ups. The best in the biz. That guy is amazing, I wish we had him..
How did Caio bag Alessa Quizon?
There was a Quiz on at a bar and there was a question about the play Children of Alessa God ……..
Something tells me the work you put into this reference was headache inducing. You’re classic brother!
No one else here makes me Google shit as much as you.
I’ll Google this shit too.
I was and absolute surfing Zealot but with a thirst for knowledge and pop culture trivia. I love to play with words in English and in French while battering my head learning German .
Why so negative? Because it’s funny.
Well apparently you can script this! That was in the board review league Karl.
lontom is my thai half brother
Also, caio ibelli is a bad ass kiter and rips on that so maybe alessa wanted to learn? Dunno.
Separated with industrial strength chicken wire?
Fuck I don’t care about the commentary , as the product they have to comment on is fucked .
what fucken sport has 30 min performance windows to entertain the masses, and 5 minutes of action ……25 x 16 heats = 400 mins / 6.75 hrs a day of having to talk shit day after day , event after event ….
If there was a mandatory 15 waves minimum for each surfer there would be action , but at the moment live surfing does not work , and the commentators have mission impossible!
Perhaps the WSL should take a cue from golf, somewhat comparable in length it takes to decide a winner, and tell the commentators to shut the fuck up most of the time, whisper some of the time, and be Anchorman pompous all the time.
You’re right about live surfing does not work at the moment. But, just wait till we get dead surfing in 45 second moments on the Ranch. Uptick in mad cow disease. You heard it here first.
The pool will be interesting as , if there is the same wave every 4.5 mins , well we have at least 12 waves per hour .
I imagine there will be no man on man , do 36 surfers get one wave ,get a score like snowboarding ,then get one more run and the highest wave or aggregate x 2 will win …….is that entertaining and exciting?
Not in my opinion. But, Farcebook thinks so. I bet the WSL signed that broadcast deal with their sights firmly fixed on VR Oculus applications and what VR could do to generate profits.
The golf comparison made me think. What if 16 surfers could be in the water at one break, say hossegor at the same time and they just surf any peaks they like, traditional priority. 16 camera men catch the footage, judges judge the waves / replays and after 1 hour we’ve watched heaps of surfing and have 4 go through into a 1 hour final, same format. 2 hour tv broadcast, easy.
But what do we do when it comes to Pipe? Oh, yeah…
If we have pipe it could run as is, worth the wait in my opinion. Maybe chuck 8 in the water for pipe. I wan’t to see guys paddling over each other, create some stories that this sport needs.
Yep! Great idea. I fucking hate golf with a passion. However, the cameras manage to follow around 120 fools, playing in potentially 120 different locations and manage to put a broadcast together. There is NO lull in any action and the best golfers are featured extensively. Surfing is so hung up on a handful of people surfing in exactly the same location that opportunities are lost for an exciting broadcast.
Cricket?