He is out of Snapper but here for ten more years!
Much consternation is ripping around the globe right now as the great Kelly Slater just let it be known, via Instagram, that he will not surf at 2018’s Snapper opener. That his foot is ouchy and panicking is not the right call and… oh what am I doing paraphrasing the man. He has fingers. He can speak for himself.
I have officially withdrawn from the #QuikProGoldCoast. For many months, my gut feeling has been to use this injury as a platform to overhaul and reset my mind and body. The looming excitement about a new year starting, my foot sort of magically allowing me to surf the past couple of days, and a number of other factors had me talking myself back into jumping in as soon as possible against my better judgment. I feel I’ve had a couple of half hearted attempts these past couple of years fighting injury and desire. The foot injury symbolizes a lot at this point in my career both as an ending and as a beginning. Hearing @mfanno talk about his reasons for retiring at the upcoming Bells event yesterday rang true for me also around going in the direction of doing things that make you uncomfortable. Competing is a natural environment for us both and it’s the easy route for me. I think it best that I properly rehabilitate the injury and choose to surf wholeheartedly, not from the excitement or stress of a last minute arrival. It’s not very professional or responsible and it won’t allow me to be at my best potential. I really love the energy around the events, especially a new year, and I find myself at odds especially with a potential Kirra swell approaching. I wish the best for everyone this event and a special good luck to @mikeyfebruary who will surf in my absence. Let him know if he wins I’m requesting a 10% caddy fee!😀🤷🏽♂️ Thanks to the WSL and crew for helping accommodate my predicament and I’ll be back when the time is right for me.✌🏽
Long, I know, and those inclined to dismal outlooks/ in bad relationships will read the parts about Mick and taking 10% of a poor South African’s winnings as tacit admission of defeat. That the end snuck up on them while they were… checking Instagram.
But here is the thing. Kelly Slater is not Mick Fanning. He is not a fast bogan who hunchbacked his way to three accidental world titles and a fortuitous shark punch.
No.
Kelly Slater is the greatest athlete of all time. He is even greater than Tom Brady and Tom Brady has vowed to play professional football until he is 50.
Professional football, for those unaware, is a difficult game. A hard game where men leave and commit suicide because their brains are so rattled and bodies so broken.
Professional surfing is not professional football and moreover with the new changes. Do you not think Kelly will surf at his own Surf Ranch? Do you not think he will surf in the four global Surf Ranch events that will define the tour in four years? The future is Kelly’s and he knows it. He will surf professionally until he is 50 or maybe even 60 in pools that he invented because what the hell else is he going to do? Launch a beer company?
No.
Except that MF is a generous man, not a snide, insecure passive-aggressive. Slater’s surfing was phenomenal, and in good health he would probably still be a threat at specialist spots like Kirra, Pipe and Teahupoo, but he’s rapidly painting himself into a corner as a human.
Blogger takes cheap shots at world champ for being nasty to him.
Be the better man Chas, if you keep up this vendetta the surf industry will take sides and it won’t be on yours.
How many titles do you have Chas 🙄 dickhead
fannings best video parts were from the reef movie and campaign one and momentum:under the influence
lets get real now Chas. American football is not a hard game. you guys wear pads & helmets to protect yourselves. It’s a pansy act dont you think? I am surprised that you even call it professional, given all the cotton wool your players are hidden in.
At least Mick is smart enough to realize his time is done. He doesn’t have the skills to compete with the current new crop of surf gymnastics. Not sure what Slater’s motivation is to continue to try and compete? Zero chance a another world title. He’s the same age as most of the kids on tour fathers. He’s becoming the creepy old man still going to college age parties and concerts. Time waits for no man. Age gracefully and move on Kelly. The golf course awaits…
You’re a fuckin Jew!
Speaking of beer company launching have you been taking note of Taj and mates beer brand Honest and it’s ads staring honest blokes, quite amusing.
Unlike others, Mick wouldn’t let a coffee table get in the way of his dreams.
A slower surfer at J bay would have suffered a lot worse than bruised knuckles; but fastest doesn’t mean best in surfing. Fanning doesnt even come close to Jimmy Slade. Slater is still in a league all his own statistically, professionally, and Fannings’ air game is a joke compared to slater with his 720s and rodeo clowns. I honestly think Fanning is boring and was pushed through to more titles and wins than he deserved.
(And outside of pro surfing, Fannings beer and softboard companies are fairly lame compared to the fake wave co.)
SPEED POWER FLOW ?
They are guidlines. Sunny Garcia should of had more titles if that ws really all that mattered.
Fastest doesn’t mean best in surfing ? On which f.cking Planet ?
It aint nascar. Its not a race.
Ok so mick passes on the fastest surfer on the planet title to Toledo. Are we now understanding the importance of speed in surfing ?
Yes. Its everything. But Mick didnt beat Yadin at pipe, he got pushed thru. Judges just a had a boner for Fanning over the years. Slater was a league above the rest in his time. I agree with this article, Mick is great, but he’s no Jimmy Slade.
Good .
Nobody wins world titles over a years worth of events “accidentally”.
Way too farken harsh.
Mick might not bust massive airs but his surfing is faster than anyone’s.
Anyone on this forum would be stoked to do just one turn as good as he does.
Credit where credits due, cmon.
When you burn Mick, you Napalm him from existence in one simplistic sentence. As far as Slaters ability to have form in his 50s? Mike Stewart’s in his 50s and still frothing hard, so why not? Not impossible nor improbable.
I’m calling bullshit on the punching part. No photo evidence Bro. Wave was in the way.
He had grazes on his hand mate. Fact.
Ya dont get them punching water.
If you’ve ever rubbed your hand against a sharks skin you’d know its bloody sharp.
Oh whoa gnar! Thanks for the info bro. I was being a barn there.
Barbed-tongue dolphin.
Wicked sense of humour but in a nasty mood often.
Could be from surfing like a hunchback and dragging knuckles on the reef though.
Oh hey, I heard Purps is going under too. Rough week for The GOAT.
slater has been blowing tenore of rvca for a while now and loves anything he touches. tenore is the only head honcho in the industry that has a real connection to the surf scene. wooly is gone. volcom went haywire. rvca could step up and sponsor a lot of events instead of giving money to christian fletcher
Sure Christian, but especially Ford Archbold.
Kelly will keep competing, own the tour, be head judge as well as commissioner all whilst throwing shade on anyone else!!!
Surfing and football have more in common than you give credit for Chas. Adam Sandler made a football movie called The Waterboy. Who is more of a Waterboy than Kelly? He makes his own damn waves! The Fonz was in that movie. On Happy Days he jumped a shark. Mick Fanning says “I’m not jumping this fucker. I’m knocking it the fuck out!” (Its been my experience that Australians say fuck a lot)
Lots of similarities between sports. No?
Personally, I hope Kelly doesn’t retire to exclusively splash around in his gated community of wave pools. Losing Mick from the line up is bad. Losing Kelly as well would be….bad-er.
Personally, I would have preferred if he never surfed , stayed in Florida and got shot into space by NASA. Just joking smelly fans .A mate organized a QS at Maroubra , sponsored by Snickers , which Kelly won . Was a joy to see the genius at work ! Will never forget him swallowing whole a family size packet of cookies after the final .
His contract with Michelob Ultra has a non-compete.
“fast bogan who hunchbacked his way to three accidental world titles and a fortuitous shark punch”…that’s a podium for grudge holding, Chas.
Unlike Slater and Andy I will never look back in history and remember any stand out moments from Mick other than that shark wrestle and his signature flipflops.
Micks wave? Or was it Joel’s? Fuck I can’t remember now, they’re basically the same person. You know, that fast right in Yemen or Oman or the Congo or maybe it was Argentina. Did they ever tell us? Was that Mick? I think he had bottle opener thongs? Or was that Joel??
Unlike Germany’s Greatest contribution to surfing the Blockhaus( the bloody council destroyed my favorite at Hourtin and I am still shitty about it 20 years later).Slowly being swallowed by the beaches on which they were built ,along the Atlantic Coast.History may be viewed in diverse ways dependent on the shared cultural myths of the observers .Would have thought that a kid winning Bells as a wildcard and then going on to wrestle 3 world titles from the smelly skater would qualify as standout moments ?
Who can ever forget the savage bottom turn at Pipe that won him the title?
Bogans come from Melbourne . Mick coming from Penrith is a Sydney Westie n’est pas.
Bogans do come from Melbourne!! The term was first reportedly used in print in Tracks magazine cira 1985.
What would you call someone from your neck of the woods who resembles a Bogan ?
A Bogan.
Silly me I forgot that NZ was an outer suburb of Melbourne.
My old man just came back from a holiday in New Zealand and wants me to take him on a surf trip there which will suit his geriatric ability. He said he saw some nice waves that weren’t that crowded. Where do you reckon I take him, Negz?
Orewa.
I looked up Orewa. I’m not going but thank you for the suggestion.
Good call, as Neg said a camper Van’s a good way to do it. The Central North Isand block between Taranaki, Raglan, Gisborne and the Coromandel is a sure bet. Just be aware that tides are generally bigger than Oz and winds tend to swing around a lot more.
Just get a camper van and cruise… east to west at the most is 4 hours. Full of fun waves, if you haven’t much time stick to the North Island. 2 weeks or more head South…
Ok thanks mate
flat earth ale
*bitter*